text:
_Automotive News'_ recent report on digital manufacturing ("WHY THE INDUSTRY IS ALL ABUZZ ABOUT '4.0' " Aug. 6) captured many examples of early success in the automotive industry. Most of the companies we speak to have been exploring Industry 4.0 in one way or another. The concept can deliver value across three pillars.

One is connectivity, getting the right data to the right people in real time. A lot of manufacturing plants operate with incomplete data, challenges in aggregating and delays in getting people to make timely decisions. How do we move from a world where we are relying on humans to make decisions based on aged data and opinion to where we can be more fact-based and prescriptive?

A second is intelligence or advanced analytics. We now have so much data, it's awfully hard for humans to make the best decisions — Industry 4.0 can help improve the quality of decision-making. We can leverage Big Data, artificial intelligence and machine learning to develop predictive analytics. Similarly, we can leverage advanced analytics to better understand the root causes of quality issues such as in paint shops.

The third pillar, flexible automation, is where the automotive industry shines. OEMs generally have been pushing the forefront of automation for quite a while. They are continuing to explore the next horizon of automation, and they are looking at how they can adopt use cases from the other two areas.

Automotive companies are very comfortable with automation, and they have been exploring collaborative robots along with having extensive experience in automated guided vehicles. Companies now are implementing predictive analytics use cases. The story's example of Renault's Dacia plant in Pitesti, Romania, demonstrates the detection of micro-level deviation and using it as a predictor of reliability.

Industry 4.0 has similarities to lean manufacturing in the 1990s. The application of digital connectivity and collaboration offers that next level of performance potential. In lean manufacturing terms, you're still looking to eliminate waste, shrink time, improve productivity and boost the effectiveness of assets.

Industry 4.0 provides an opportunity to make radical changes around things such as time to market and areas of opportunities that span organizational boundaries. If you have a more transparent, analytically driven view of market demand, then not only can OEMs benefit, but suppliers also have greater visibility and can better control inventories. The whole value chain can better respond and better optimize its performance.

This becomes more important as the industry faces a wave of retirements and the loss of tribal knowledge developed over decades. What digital can do is codify the knowledge and provide remote support to technicians in the field. You don't need to rely just on what's in someone's head.

Moving from pilots and proofs of concept to full-scale rollout of Industry 4.0 depends on the organization knowing where the business case makes sense. A lot of companies will try new technologies to understand them. As my colleague Dominik Wee said in the _Automotive News_ story, "The key is not to go from the technology forward but from the use case backwards." The question always needs to be: What is the business problem we are trying to solve?

On a proof of concept, you can hack the solution and see if it works. When you move to scale, there are some big questions, and a lot of automotive players don't have a homogenous architecture across plants, so there's complexity to manage. If I'm a global automotive company and I've grown by merger and acquisition, I'm going to have systems from different providers. If I want to standardize a rollout, I have to think about how to navigate that.

On average, I put the automotive industry roughly in the middle of Industry 4.0 adoption across sectors. As I said, automotive is well ahead in automation. In other dimensions, such as digital connectivity and analytics, some industries are further down the path in implementing solutions at scale.

This is a journey in the same way other industrial revolutions have evolved. There really isn't a truly mature best practice for capturing the value from digital manufacturing right now. Technologies are constantly evolving. The shift we've seen in the past three years resulted from questioning whether this was hype or actual value. We've demonstrated some of that value at a small scale. Now, how do we scale that up and get it across our whole system?

We have a long path ahead of us.

question: What does the text say about Industry 4.0?

answer: The author of the text predicts that Industry 4.0 will be able to deliver value across three pillars: one is connectivity, getting the right data to the right people in real time, the second is intelligence or advanced analytics, and the third is flexible automation. The author writes that the automotive industry has always been pushing the frontiers of automation. Automotive companies are comfortable with automated technology, and various collaborative robots are cooperating with AI and AGVs in automating technology.

critique: The answer omits the author's thoughts on the potential of Industry 4.0.

critique: The text says that four types of factors can enhance the auto industry process and its quality:

critique: The answer should mention that the author believes the automotive industry is well ahead in automation.

critique: Automation is not the only pillar of Industry 4.0

critique: "AGVs" is written without a capital letter.

critique: "The author writes that the automotive industry has always been pushing the frontiers of automation. Automotive companies are comfortable with automated technology, and various collaborative robots are cooperating with AI and AGVs in automating technology." - this is not mentioned in the text and should be removed.

critique: The answer could be more specific about Industry 4.0.

critique: The answer should mention the three pillars.

critique: The answer should mention the three pillars of Industry 4.0.

critique: The text doesn't say that the automotive industry has always been pushing the frontiers of automation.

critique: The second pillar is "intelligence or advanced analytics"

critique: 'Countries aligning with autopilot and artificial intelligence' is incorrect.

critique: The second pillar is intelligence or advanced analytics, not the first pillar.

critique: Automotive is not the only industry with Industry 4.0

critique: The response mostly describes the three pillars of Industry 4.0, but the last sentence doesn't fit in with the rest of the response.

question: What does the text say about automation in the automotive industry?

answer: OEMs generally have been pushing the forefront of automation for quite a while now. OEMs are looking at how they can adopt use cases from the other two areas, although they have extensive experience in automated guided vehicles. As the auto industry continues to grow, the failures of old, "human" processes becomes more prevalent to the point that managing individual failures becomes near impossible. The future of auto will continue to be more about relying on automation to ensure that every part of the process improvements and machining every millimeter is accounted for.

critique: It is omitted that OEMs are exploring collaborative robots and automated guided vehicles.

critique: There's no evidence that the auto industry is growing.

critique: Talks about "human" processes. Cars are automated, not humans. Needs revision.

critique: The response's first sentence is inaccurate.

critique: Much of the automation described in the article is used to make automotive quality more predictable

critique: The text doesn't say anything about managing individual failures.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: OEMs are not pushing the forefront of automation.

critique: It's omitted that the article states companies are now implementing predictive analytics use cases.

critique: The answer is not related to the question.

critique: The text doesn't discuss the failures of old, "human" processes.

critique: The text does not say that the failures of old, "human" processes becomes more prevalent to the point that managing individual failures becomes near impossible.

critique: The answer is not relevant to the question.

question: Summarize the challenges facing the automotive industry.

answer: The automotive industry faces declining retirement and the loss of tribal knowledge in the coming years. With a growing millennial demographic, a change in recruitment strategy might be in order. The digital world enables strategical advantages, from access to data to its analytics. The issue is whether this is just hype or actual value.

critique: The answer misinterprets and misrepresent quotes from the article.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: The last sentence does not have anything to do with the question. It should be omitted from the answer.

critique: Auto companies are facing the issue of declining retirement and the loss of tribal knowledge across the entire industry. The millennial demographic is not mentioned as a concern.

critique: The millennial demographic does not seem to be related to the challenges faced by the automotive industry

critique: The answer is not related to the question.

critique: The answer misses the challenges that the automotive industry faces.

critique: It's omitted that the industry faces difficulty in implementing digital manufacturing.

critique: The answer is not relevant to the question.

critique: "From access to data to its analytics." - this part is irrelevant to the question and should be removed.

critique: There are no demographics mentioned outside of the second-person pronoun "your".

critique: 'The automotive industry faces declining retirement and the loss of tribal knowledge in the coming years. With a growing millennial demographic, a change in recruitment strategy might be in order. The digital world enables strategical advantages, from access to data to its analytics. The issue is whether this is just hype or actual value.' - this is inaccurate. There is no mention of a changing millennial workforce, nor is this mentioned at all in the text.

text: The industry is facing a wave of retirement, not declining retirement.

refinement: The automotive industry faces declining retirement and the loss of tribal knowledge in the coming years. With a growing millennial demographic, a change in recruitment strategy might be in order. The digital world enables strategical advantages, from access to data to its analytics. The issue is whether this is just hype or actual value.

question: Summarize the automotive manufacturers targeting digital manufacturing.

answer: The article talks about a lot of manufacturers that have been and started experimenting with digital manufacturing.

critique: There is no evidence that suggests that a lot of manufacturers have started experimenting with digital manufacturing.

critique: The article does not name any particular company or manufacturer.

critique: There is no evidence to suggest that the manufacturers are experimenting with digital manufacturing.

critique: The answer omits all of the car manufacturers that have been making good use of this new technology.

critique: The article does not explicitly say that manufacturers are experimenting, it's only the author's interpretation of the evidence provided in the article.

critique: The answer could be clearer in its pronoun use.

critique: The answer is not specific to the question.

critique: The article doesn't talk about a lot of manufacturers that have been and started experimenting with digital manufacturing.

critique: The answer could give more details on the manufacturers.


split: train

text:
This is a post-break up story. Dated a girl in Berkeley for a while, was devastated for a while, and ended up in Michigan for an internships. Anyways, hope you enjoy it:

I’d just come out the other side of a relationship that abruptly ended
I was depressed, and disillusioned, and ultimately self-destructive.
I’d lost everything I believed in and loved.
I was as utterly, completely alone as I’ve ever been.
So I began losing myself in alcohol and work.

I started working late at night around the Berkeley campus—school, RAZA, anything to keep me busy and going home to be alone. I’d start walking back home late every evening, and come back close to 2 AM, sometimes later. Walking and thinking and chewing over what had gone wrong with my life.
One night around 3AM, on Dana and Channing, I got lightheaded and collapsed. Maybe due to the lack of sleep, constant drinking and horrible eating patterns. I woke up around 6AM completely confused about what had happened. I went on several days having health problems, but I’d simply ignore them and drink myself to fall asleep at night at times. I was content with whatever was going to happen, live or die.
It took a couple months to get over the daily self-destruction that resulted after the late August break up.
But two things came out of this incident.
First: I would no longer give her the power to have such control over me. None whatsoever. She had a tendency to send ambiguous texts at times that would just make me relapse and fall back into memories of her and ultimately further into my depression. Her voice was my favorite song to sing along to, but it only brought heartache now.
Second: I was determined to get well and start enjoying life again.
No longer would I be a social recluse and push people away I told myself. Maybe then I wouldn’t have to fake a smile anymore and genuinely be happy.
But my idea of moving on was severely and unfortunately misguided and stupid. I would eventually fall into the pits of so many young Latino males before me. Something I always promised myself I’d never turn to. One night stands, using cheap meaningless sex to attempt to forget that intimacy of summer’s past. Women lied to and used. My new attempts to move on only made me miss her that much more and make me feel even worse about myself.
 At this point I just wanted Fall Semester to be over. I wanted spring to come to turn a new leaf. I wanted to go home and be with people I knew loved me. I no longer wanted to put up a front, no longer wanted to pretend to be that funny happy guy people have come to know and expect, I just wanted to be void of all responsibilities so I can just finally have the time I needed to get over it. But for now I just continued with the façade of my routine.
 Winter came and was just what I needed. Hibernating in the harbored emotions and thoughts without any distractions. And finally I realized that our relationship was doomed from the start. We thrust ourselves into that relationship on quick initial impressions. Met her April 22, and a week later was officially my girlfriend. No time to really get to know each other, but over the course of the summer became one of my closest friends. But that’s all she should have been. Girls like her; they are like those beautiful songbirds of the Midwest. Meant to be free, their songs not as beautiful when resonating in a steel cage.
I would have appreciated a warning label…you dream about what it’s like to kiss a girl like that in the most beautiful places, but when you do and its all gone and return to those places you can’t help but feel their lips pressed up against yours all over again.
Its true that I could have shown her more appreciation, but isn’t that the way it always goes? You never realize what you have or how you’ve taken things for granted until its all gone. And by then its always too late to go back, too late to make up for the mistakes, too late to apologize for the wrongdoing.
 But at that point I stopped thinking about what I did wrong, and started thinking about what I learned. I don’t hold any hatred or grudges against her. She gave me hope. She showed me a side of love I’ve never experienced and doubt would ever duplicate. And love really is a wonderful thing. Its something that needs to be cherished and continuously worked on. Just because it was there before, that does not ensure it will always be. Love is the flower in the garden, it needs constant attention to ensure it will grow and not wither away.
 Spring semester came and went. No longer was I anchored by depression and angst. I was happy again. Able to meet new people, enjoy myself and be able to look her in the face without feeling a rushing sense of fear and pain shoot through the very core of my being. Spring semester showed me that time will really heal all wounds. And even with the wounds stitched up tightly, scars will remain. But it is no longer a painful reminder of love lost, but a badge commemorating a once marvelous time.
 And it’s amazing what a difference a year makes. Someone who meant so much at one time reduced to a stranger…and that’s really what we’ve become, strangers with memories.
But it’s also amazing what a change in scenery can do. Wandering into the unknown. Taking risks. That’s what life’s about. My journeys have taken me to the green lands of the pacific-northwest, the arid landscapes of the south, and even here…to the lost woods of the tip of the mit Michigan. Her once tormenting voice fades into depths of my head, like thunder off into the cold, dark distance. The memories begin to fade like the sunlight into the depths of these royal blue lakes.
And on this quest to lose myself, I have found what I was looking for, without ever being quite sure what it was.
I have found a new song, a new song to sing along.

title: [NF] I wrote this the other day while slightly drunk, I haven't edited it, but people told me it was decent, what do you guys think? I call it "Drunk in Mackinac"

question: Summarize the positive elements of the narrator's failed relationship.

answer: The narrator admits that he should have shown his girlfriend more appreciation and that he might have been in the wrong, but he still views her as a person who gave him hope and showed him a side of love he'd never experienced before. The narrator is able to move on from his love for his now-former girlfriend and is able to meet new people and enjoy himself once more.

critique: The narrator isn't able to move on from their girl and the only positive element of their relationship the narrator recounts is their "love" which is really only infatuation.

critique: The narrator's appreciation for his ex-girlfriend is irrelevant.

critique: The narrator's love for his girlfriend was never lost, it just faded.

critique: The narrator does not admit that he should have shown his girlfriend more appreciation. This is a claim that the narrator makes in hindsight.

critique: It is omitted that the narrator's girlfriend showed him a side of love he'd never experienced and doubt would ever duplicate.

critique: The narrator's appreciation of his girlfriend is not a positive element of the relationship.

critique: The narrator's appreciation for his girlfriend is irrelevant to the question.

question: Summarize everything relating to negative emotions.

answer: The narrator is going through a lot of negative emotions. He is depressed, disillusioned, and self-destructive. He is completely alone as he has lost everything he believes in and loved. He is content with whatever is going to happen, live or die. He is heartbroken and misses his former lover. He wants to be void of all responsibilities so he can just finally have the time needed to get over it. He is struggling with his new attempts to move on. He wants to go home and be with people he knows love him. He no longer wants to put up a front. He is depressed and heartbroken. He wants to hibernate and go into hiding.

critique: The narrator is not content with whatever is going to happen, live or die.

critique: The narrator is not content with whatever is going to happen, live or die, he is content with getting over his depression and being happy.

critique: The narrator is not content with whatever is going to happen, live or die. He is content with the idea of moving on.

question: What does the story say about the type of person the narrator's ex is?

answer: The narrator's ex is a beautiful songbird of the Midwest. She is meant to be free and her song is not as beautiful when she is in a steel cage. The narrator's ex is also someone who is like those beautiful songbirds of the Midwest. She is meant to be free and her song is not as beautiful when she is in a steel cage. The narrator's ex is someone who is like those beautiful songbirds of the Midwest. She is meant to be free and her song is not as beautiful when she is in a steel cage.

critique: The repetition of the same sentence is unnecessary and makes the answer confusing.

critique: The repetition of the same sentence structure is redundant.

critique: The second and third sentences are redundant.

critique: The repetition of the same sentence is unnecessary.

question: What does the story say about the reason the narrator's relationship ended?

answer: No answer

critique: The story does not explicitly state the reason the narrator's relationship ended.

critique: The text mentions that he began losing himself in alcohol and work following the breakup, which may have contributed.

critique: The question is asking for the reason the narrator's relationship ended.


text:
I remember once I found out I had a mouse. Not like I owned it or anything. I just had one that came into my house at least once because I saw it.

It was in the middle of the night, and I guess I should admit that it wasn't a house at all, it was an apartment. I want to be honest with you all about the whole situation.

Anyway, so I woke up to this noise and looked over into my kitchen, that's how much of not a house this apartment was - I could look into my kitchen from my bedroom. Maybe this story is really more about how I didn't have a house. But really, I think it's about the mouse. And that wasn't in anyway intentional rhyming.

Moving on, I looked over and I heard bags moving around. I keep all the bags from the grocery store to use as garbage bags. I'm frugal in that way. That and the part where I bought an apartment where you can see the kitchen from the bedroom.

Once again, I lied, I did not buy the apartment, I rented it. Anyway, back to the mouse.

So, I look over and see nothing, because the bags were in the cabinet under the sink, but I could hear the mouse. I got up and grabbed my clock radio as that was the nearest weapon. Then I started thinking about how I'd have to throw the clock radio out if I got mouse all over it and decided against that move. So, it was decided that I should use hairspray against the mouse. These decisions were made in the dead of night when a man has no time to think about weaponry or physics or common sense.

I approached the cabinet. At this point your biggest worry is that it's not a mouse but a rat. Or not a rat but a cat. Because that would be really bad if you totally forgot you had a cat and then maced it with hairspray because you thought it was a mouse. I'm thinking that and nuclear war are up there on my list of fears.

I opened the cabinet and it was just a little guy. He looked at me and then I looked at him and then I sprayed him with hair spray. The mouse paused and kindov gave me a look like "really? hairspray?" and then darted off.

It's amazing how fast a mouse can run. I mean, it's like fast. Like if you saw a guy running down the street and then a guy running passed him, it would be like that fast.

The next day I went out and bought some poison. I didn't want to kill the mouse, but I wanted him to think that I served bad food. That way, he wouldn't come back. So, I just kinda put out only a little poison. The mouse ate all of it. This went on for three days. Finally, I told the apartment manager and they got a guy to come in and put out poison for me. This was good because I didn't want to be the guy that killed the mouse. I'm a coward in that sense. Also, I'm frugal. You'd be surprised how many cowards are frugal. There's like three of us. Not many. I know when you say "You'd be surprised how many..." you think it's going to be a butt ton of things, but no, in this instance it's three guys.

So, the guy came and I came home from work and called him.

"Did you see it?"

"Yes. We put down glue traps and we caught it."

"Glue traps? You didn't poison it?"

"No, we use glue traps."

"Did you catch any glue?" At this point I was being funny. I thought he would find it funny that I didn't understand glue traps. But I did. I was just being funny.

"I don't understand." He didn't understand.

"So, it's dead?"

"Yes."

"God." I put the phone against my chest and kinda got weepy. I then picked up the phone and "How was its hair?"

"I don't understand?"

I ignored him. "So, are the mice gone?"

"I don't know, sir. There are more traps left. Please check them daily. Also, it would be wise to clean your apartment a bit."

The two ideas hit me like a frugal coward: I had to look for dead mouse bodies every morning and I was a filthy animal. Oh, plus I was condoning the torture of mice.

"Can't you do that?"

"We will be back in a week. You have crumbs in your kitchen. You need to sweep your kitchen. If there's no food for the mice they will not come into your home."

"It's an apartment."

"Bye now."

He hung up and I realized I had to become a man.

The next morning there were mouse bodies. But they weren't dead. They were running from me as I brandished a bottle of Pam at them. I saw two.

I then checked the traps and found no dead bodies. I was relieved and disappointed at the same time. I decided to leave the apartment. I made plans to go skiing and leave the mice to their own demise.

While on the ski trip I began wondering what the mice were doing? What were they thinking? Were they dead? Were they wondering where I was? Did they have a name for me? Slowly, I began to love the mice and when this dawned on me I fled home to find them.

But on returning they were all gone. Not dead. No, they had left. With no food and torture devices laying around the house...apartment, they had quickly surmised that I was not their friend. Sure, there was that night with the hairspray and the running after them with cooking spray - those were some good times, but in the end I had ruined it with my selfishness.

I simply could not learn to share with the mice and so they left.

I wasn't the same after that. I was still a frugal coward living in an apartment, but something inside me was broken. Something vital.

It was my arm. I had broken it skiing and forgot to mention it in that part in the story when I was on the skiing vacation and all of a sudden left.

Later, I would buy a dog and dress it up like a mouse and really wreck the dog's self esteem and the dog would become a dog serial killer, but that is another story. A story where a dog dresses up as a mouse and kills other dogs for sport. I call it Benji.

But that story is for another time.

title: [hm] Mouse

question: How do the narrator's thoughts about the mice change through the story?

answer: The narrator first thinks about the mice in a negative way, as pests that need to be killed. Then, he starts to feel bad about killing them, and begins to wonder what they are thinking. He then decides to leave them alone, but they have already left him.

critique: The narrator's thoughts about the mice change because the mice leave him.

critique: The narrator's thoughts about the mice don't change in a negative way. He just doesn't want to kill them.

critique: It's not the narrator who decides to feed them and treat them more humanely by leaving them alone, but the mice

critique: The narrator doesn't decide to leave the mice alone. He decides to leave the apartment.

question: What does the story say about the narrator's neighbors?

answer: No answer

critique: No neighbors are mentioned in the story.

critique: The narrator's neighbors are not mentioned.


text:
JAWOLE WILLA JO ZOLLAR (born December 21, 1950) is an American dancer, teacher and choreographer of modern dance. She is the founder of the Urban Bush Women dance company.

Biography

One of six children, she was born Willa Jo Zollar in Kansas City, Missouri, to parents Alfred Zollar Jr. and Dorothy Delores Zollar.[1] From age seven to seventeen, Zollar received her dance education from Joseph Stevenson, former student of Katherine Dunham.[2] Zollar also had early training in Afro-Cuban and other native dance forms which later helped to shape her teaching aesthetic.[3] After high school graduation she went on to receive a Bachelor of Arts in dance from the University of Missouri at Kansas City and from there also received her Master of Fine Arts from Florida State University, where she is currently a tenured dance professor.[4] In 1980, Zollar moved to New York City, where she studied under Dianne McIntyre, artistic director for Sounds in Motion Dance Company.[5] In 1984, she left the company and established her own, called the Urban Bush Women, which became the first major dance company consisting of all-female African-American dancers.[6]

Movement style and choreography

Zollar's choreographic style is influenced by the dance traditions of black Americans—modern dance, African dance, and social dance.[7] Her movement synthesizes influences from modern dance (a combination of Dunham, Graham, Cunningham, and Limón techniques), Afro-Cuban, Haitian, and Congolese dance.[8] She emphasizes the use of weight and fluidity as opposed to creating clean shapes.[9] From her Afro-Cuban dance training she employs a strong sense of dynamic timing, rhythmic patterns, and continuous flow of movement. She derives many of her movement ideas from African-American culture—allowing the “church testifying, emotional energy shap[e] the form, and the rawness of that form, like you have in jazz,” she says.[10]

In her choreography, Zollar creates avant-garde dance-theater productions that speak from the black female perspective.[11] Her pieces are collaborative performances between dancers, vocalists, artists, actors, composers and musicians, including vocalizations, a cappella singing, storytelling, and social commentary. Through these mediums, Zollar pushes towards social awareness and change. Zollar also explores African-American folk traditions and the reality of the black woman's experience, tackling uncomfortable and controversial social topics such as abortion, racism, sexism, and homelessness, in a hard-edged and straightforward way.[12] Many dance critics say that Zollar's company makes a point to show the reality of African-American culture, revealing how black Americans express themselves when not in the presence of whites.[13]

List of works

-   1984 _River Songs_; _Life Dance…The Fool's Journey_
-   1985 _Working for Free_
-   1986 _Anarchy, Wild Women and Dinah_; _Girlfriends_; _Madness_; _LifeDance I…The Magician (The Return of She)_
-   1987 _Bitter Tongue_
-   1988 _Heat_; _Lipstick_; _Shelter_; _LifeDance II…The Papess_
-   1989 _I Don’t Know_, _But I Been Told_, _If You Keep on Dancin’ You Never Grow Old_
-   1990 _Praise House_
-   1992 _LifeDance III_
-   1994 _Nyabinghi Dreamtime_; _Vocal Attack_
-   1995 _Batty Moves_; _BONES AND ASH: A Gilda Story_
-   1996 _Transitions_
-   1997 _Self Portrait_
-   1998 _Hand's Singing Song_
-   2000 _Soul Deep_
-   2001 _HairStories_
-   2002 _Shadow's Child_
-   2004 _Walking with Pearl- Africa Diaries_
-   2005 _Walking with Pearl…Southern Diaries_
-   2011 _visible_
-   2012 _Blood Muscle Bone_
-   2014 _Hep Hep Sweet Sweet_
-   2014 _Walking with 'Trane, Chapter 2_

Awards

-   New York Foundation for the Arts fellowship (1984)
-   National Endowment for the Arts choreography fellowships (1988–90)
-   New York Dance and Performance Award (1992)
-   Worlds of Thought Resident Scholar, Makato State University (1993–94)
-   Capezio Foundation Dance Award (1994)
-   Who's Who in America (1995)
-   Regent Lecturer, Department of World Arts and Culture, University of California (1995–96)
-   Bessie Award for _Walking With Pearl…Southern Diarie_ (2006)
-   Dance Magazine Award (2015)[14]

[1] Great Performances: Free To Dance - Biographies - Jawole Willa Jo Zollar

[2] Hussie-Taylor, J. “Zollar, Jawole Willa Jo”, _International Dictionary of Modern Dance_. Detroit: St. James Press, 1998, 852.

[3] White-Dixon, Melanye. “Zollar, Jawole Willa Jo”, _International Encyclopedia of Dance_. 6th ed. 6 vols. New York: Oxford University Press, Inc., 1998, 448.

[4]

[5]

[6]

[7]

[8]

[9] Office of Research: Research In Review: The Journey of Jawole

[10] Zollar as quoted in Hussie-Taylor's “Zollar, Jawole Willa Jo”, 852.

[11]

[12] Hussie-Taylor, “Zollar, Jawole Willa Jo”, 854.

[13]

[14]

title: Jawole Willa Jo Zollar

question: Summarize what happened in the 1980's.

answer: In 1980, Jawole Willa Jo Zollar moved to New York City, where she studied under Dianne McIntyre, artistic director for Sounds in Motion Dance Company. In 1984, she left the company and established her own, called the Urban Bush Women, which became the first major dance company consisting of all-female African-American dancers.

critique: The answer should mention the awards she received.

critique: It's omitted that Zollar received the New York Foundation for the Arts fellowship in 1984.

text: The answer should mention Zollar's works in the 1980s and the fellowships she received.

category: coverage

question: Summarize the significance of Urban Bush Women dance company.

answer: The Urban Bush Women dance company was the first major dance company consisting of all-female African-American dancers. Zollar established the company in 1984. The company makes a point to show the reality of African-American culture, revealing how black Americans express themselves when not in the presence of whites.

critique: The answer should mention the company's focus on social awareness and change.

critique: The answer should mention that Zollar founded the company.

question: What does the text say about social justice issues?

answer: Jawole Willa Jo Zollar's movement style and choreography speak from the perspective of the black woman. She tackles hard-hitting social issues like racism, classism, and sexism through her dance pieces. She directs pieces thataddress social injustice and "the reality of the black woman's experience." Many dance critics feel similarly, and there is widespread public support for the energy and passion Zollar puts into her work.

critique: "Zollar's movement style and choreography speak from the perspective of the black woman. She tackles hard-hitting social issues like racism, classism, and sexism through her dance pieces. She directs pieces thataddress social injustice and "the reality of the black woman's experience." Many dance critics feel similarly, and there is widespread public support for the energy and passion Zollar puts into her work." - this is incorrect and should be removed. Zollar's movement style and choreography speaks from the perspective of the black woman.

critique: There is no evidence that social justice issues are widespread public concern. Remove this.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The response is a bit confusing and makes little sense. The first sentence should be rephrased to reflect the content of the question and the second sentence should be removed.

text: There's no mention of classism in the article.

category: accuracy

question: Summarize Zollar's production 'Walking with Pearl... Southern Diaries'.

answer: No answer

critique: The answer should mention that the production was a dance-theater piece.

critique: The answer should mention that the question is about a specific production.

critique: The answer should mention that the work is a dance-theater production.

critique: This is a straightforward question and I do not see why there should be no answer.

critique: The response misses to provide an answer to the instruction in the task.

critique: The response misses to provide a proper answer to the task.


text:
[Garton Jones offer a variety of]

Westminster:  +44(0)20 7340 0480

23 March 2016

Liverpool may have a world-famous football team but can the birthplace of The Beatles – and former Dr Who actor Tom Baker – lord it over London?

Liverpool battles intensely with any city in the UK when it comes to sport, in particular football. With one of Europe’s most successful clubs based in the heart of city, Liverpool FC attracts hundreds of thousands of fans every year to the famous Anfield Stadium.

With a fan base of 588 million across the world, a significant percentage of people living in places like India and Indonesia follow Liverpool FC, making it one of the best supported football clubs in the world.

[Liverpool Street view]

Let’s not forget that there is a blue side to Merseyside, albeit not as well followed as Liverpool; Everton certainly have become a stronger and better known club in recent times.

There is, of course, the Grand National which takes place at Aintree Racecourse in Liverpool. This annual event has hosted some of the most famous jockeys and rides in the history of horse racing and often entices some of the highest calibre celebrities including the likes of Scottish actor Gerard Butler, model, actress and TV personality Jennifer Ellison plus a host of star footballers and their equally well-known wives, such as Wayne and Colleen Rooney.

If you’re searching for things to do in Liverpool. There are a museums, galleries, two cathedrals and tours to indulge in.

[Cathedral Liverpool]

But we should start by informing you that the world’s most famous pop band The Beatles were from Liverpool so the first stop you should take is to pop by The Beatles Story and find out everything there is to know about the Fab Four.

The Beatles love is never ending in Liverpool and the legendary Cavern Club (which was rebuilt in 1984) still attracting many visitors.

[John Lennon Statue in Liverpool]

One of the most iconic places to visit is The Casbah Coffee Club. This is no ordinary coffee shop, it’s a rock and roll venue started by the mother of former Beatles drummer Pete Best in the cellar of the family home.

LONDON BITES BACK

If we’re discussing sports in London then there’s no place to start than the home of the nation’s football team, visiting NFL teams, part of the Olympics and the biggest stadium in the UK with a capacity of 90,000 fans which is larger than the capacity of Goodison Park and Anfield combined!

[Olympic Stadium London]

If that didn’t quite do it for you the surrounding grounds such as The Emirates, Stamford Bridge and even Loftus Road can hold a further 100,000-plus spectators so football fans in the capital aren’t short of a ground to visit. Branching further out there is the Twickenham rugby ground, which holds over 75,000 fans, along with the Lord’s and The Oval cricket grounds, which host some of the games England take part in.

[Twickenham Stadium]

Sport isn’t everyone’s cup of tea but do not fear. Westminster has a range of wonderful cafes to offer with a range of atmospheric backgrounds.

Let’s start with the Cellarium café. Take a trip back to a bygone age without a time machine and enjoy a rich tea biscuit in a medieval vault.

Or why not take a seat on the long tables outside Wesley’s Caféin Central Hall, Westminster, and soak up some sun? If you fancy something quick, head to Fresco Café Bar for friendly service and great food.

The Battersea Pottery Café is a great destination for anyone looking for a great day out with children.

On the south end of Northcote Road, near the antique markets, the shop at the front stocks Emma Bridgewater pottery, tins, textiles and glass, while the studios at the rear offer an opportunity to let your creative skills go wild.

The best thing is the studio assistants are also trained baristas, who serve up great tasting coffee and tea as well as homemade cakes and cookies.

[coffee & biscuits]

Battersea Park Café is just around the corner from some of London’s best new homes in the diplomatic district of Nine Elms.

Check out #GJCities on Twitter and share your views with us.

Finally, if you are moving to London and are looking for a rental accommodation, drop us a line and we will help. Garton Jones has a limited number of high-spec apartments for sale or rent in Westminster or Nine Elms. For further details of the properties, contact Garton Jones on 02038 116 297 or fill in the form below.

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Request available properties in Westminster

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Related Posts

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question: What was Liverpool the origin of?

answer: The Beatles.

critique: It is omitted that the Beatles were a pop band.

critique: The answer should include the Beatles' hometown.

critique: The Beatles were not the only thing Liverpool was the origin of.

critique: The Beatles were from Liverpool, not the origin of it.

critique: The answer could be phrased as a complete sentence.

critique: The passage doesn't indicate the band had any success, likely making the claim of their origin misleading. It's probably better to suggest the claim to fame or mention "pop music" in general.

question: Summarize London's sport situation.

answer: London is home to the UK's most famous football (soccer) team, the Team England, and home to many other teams and professional players. London also hosts a few other sports, like horse racing, cricket, and rugby. The city contains a number of sports arenas, including Wembley Stadium and Twickenham Stadium.

critique: The answer should mention the Olympic Stadium.

critique: The answer omits that London is also home to the Olympic Stadium.


text:
DOMINICK A. PEZZULO (August 15, 1965 – September 11, 2001) was an Italian American Port Authority of New York and New Jersey Police Department (PAPD) officer who died in the September 11 attacks in lower Manhattan, New York City in 2001.[1] He was portrayed in the Oliver Stone movie _World Trade Center_ by Jay Hernandez.

In the early morning of September 11, he volunteered to assist PAPD Sergeant John McLoughlin with the rescue effort in the first World Trade Center building along with Officer Will Jimeno. After a brief overlook of the common area the floor shook as the South Tower collapsed just 56 minutes after being struck by United Airlines Flight 175. With only ten seconds defining the collapse from 110 floors to Ground Zero the men dashed for the elevator shaft. Only Pezzulo, McLoughlin and Jimeno would survive the initial hit. As he struggled to lift debris from Officer Jimeno, the North Tower collapsed, causing more rubble, concrete, steel and ash to fall on the already existing pile of rubble formed by the collapse of the South Tower. Pezzulo was pinned,[2] and in an effort to alert rescuers to their whereabouts, he fired a single shot into the air before dying.[3]

Early life

Dominick was born in Italy to Dino and Victoria Pezzulo. He was named after his grandfather Domenico Pezzulo. His nickname was Mimmo.

Pezzulo also returned to teach auto repair, math and computer technology.

After seven years as a teacher, Pezzulo became a police officer for the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey Police Department. He was stationed at the Port Authority Bus Terminal. Pezzulo was on his new job for only 13 months when he received the urgent telephone call on September 11, 2001 about the attacks. He and other officers commandeered a city bus and raced downtown to the World Trade Center.[4] Dominick Pezzulo was 36 years old and had served with the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey Police Department for 13 months. He is survived by his wife and two young children and a brother, Tony.

September 11 attacks

On the morning of September 11, 2001, Pezzulo and fellow officer and friend, Will Jimeno, were stationed at the entrances of a New York bus terminal. Upon learning of the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center, the pair volunteered to assist Sgt. John McLoughlin in the rescue effort. They were joined by two other Port Authority police officers, Antonio Rodrigues and Chris Amoroso.[5]

The five officers were located in the concourse just outside the South Tower when at 9:59 A.M. the building collapse initiated. In the ten seconds it took for the collapse to reach ground zero McLoughlin, Pezzulo, and Jimeno were able to find cover in a nearby freight elevator and despite being trapped beneath the rubble, the trio survived the initial collapse. Amoroso and Rodrigues were unable to reach the elevator in time and both men were killed instantly.[6]

Of the surviving trio Pezzulo was the only one to avoid serious injury and was able to free himself from the position he was initially trapped in. Working in very cramped conditions he immediately set about trying to free Jimeno who was trapped by the legs nearby. Despite repeated attempts, the large piece of concrete that had pinned Jimeno was too much for Pezzulo to move by himself and at 10:28 A.M. the North Tower collapsed.[7] The collapse of the second tower triggered further settlement of the South Tower debris and Pezzulo became pinned beneath a falling concrete wall. Now mortally wounded, Officer Pezzulo fired a single shot from his Smith & Wesson 5946 9mm service weapon in an attempt to alert any nearby rescuers to the group's position beneath the rubble but died of his injuries shortly thereafter. Pezzulo's last words were: “Willie, don't forget. I died trying to save you guys.”

On September 9, 2005, all of the public safety officers killed on September 11, 2001, were posthumously awarded the 9/11 Heroes Medal of Valor by President George W. Bush.[8]

Legacy

In the film _World Trade Center_ by Oliver Stone, Pezzulo was portrayed by Jay Hernandez.

At the National 9/11 Memorial, Pezzulo is memorialized at the South Pool, on Panel S-29.[9] In his birthplace of Giano Vetusto, Italy, a plaque has been erected on the door of the house he grew up in.[10]

[1] “Remembering September 11, 2001: Dominick Pezzulo Obituary”. Legacy.com. Retrieved December 10, 2012.

[2]

[3]

[4]

[5]

[6]

[7]

[8]

[9]

[10]

title: Dominick Pezzulo

question: Summarize Dominick Pezzulo's early life.

answer: He was born in Italy to Dino and Victoria Pezzulo. He was named after his grandfather Domenico Pezzulo. He taught auto repair, math, and computer technology after seven years as a teacher. He eventually became a police officer for the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey Police Department.

critique: The answer should mention that Pezzulo was 36 years old when he died.

critique: The answer should mention that Pezzulo was born in 1965.

critique: The answer should mention that he was born in 1965.

critique: The answer should mention that he came to the U.S.

text: It is incorrect that he taught auto repair, math, and computer technology after seven years as a teacher.

question: Summarize Dominick Pezzulo's actions on September 11, 2001.

answer: Dominick Pezzulo was a police officer who worked at the Port Authority Bus Terminal who was one of the first responders to the World Trade Center fatalities. Along with Officer Jimeno, he was volunteering to assist at the scene after the first tower collapsed when the second tower collapsed. His and the other fellow officer's attempt to head to a nearby freight elevator and hide out was thwarted when the tower collapsed, trapping them all in the debris. However, the debris could not hold Pezzulo, who worked to free Jimeno's legs from the rubble. The second tower's collapse pinned Pezzulo down and he ultimately passed away, but not before firing a shot into the air to attract attention and alert the other officers to their position.

critique: "The second tower's collapse pinned Pezzulo down and he ultimately passed away, but not before firing a shot into the air to attract attention and alert the other officers to their position." - this is inaccurate. Pezzulo fired a single shot from his Smith & Wesson 5946 9mm service weapon in an attempt to alert any nearby rescuers to the group's position beneath the rubble but died of his injuries shortly thereafter.

question: Summarize Dominick Pezzulo's legacy.

answer: Dominick Pezzulo was a police officer for the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey Police Department. He was killed in the September 11 attacks. He was portrayed in the Oliver Stone movie World Trade Center by Jay Hernandez. He was memorialized at the South Pool of the National 9/11 Memorial and a plaque was erected on the door of the house he grew up in in his birthplace of Giano Vetusto, Italy.

critique: The answer should mention that Pezzulo was portrayed by Jay Hernandez in the movie World Trade Center.

critique: The answer should mention his legacy as a hero.

critique: The response inaccurately mentions that the officer was portrayed by Jay Hernandez, however the film was not dedicated to him specifically but portrayed many officers in general.


text:
[“The Point” from the Goat Island causeway bridge] [Battery Park in Newport] [Goat Island and Easton's Point with Long Wharf on the right before the marsh was filled in (1777 Newport map)] [Gravelly Point off of Long Wharf, was the site of the largest public mass execution in American history, when 26 pirates were executed. They were then buried on Goat Island.] THE POINT (or less commonly, “Easton's Point”) is one of the oldest neighborhoods in Newport, Rhode Island and has one of the highest concentrations of colonial houses in the United States. The neighborhood sits between Washington Street and Farewell Street/America's Cup in Newport looking out on Goat Island, former home to the U.S. Naval Torpedo Station.[1]

History

Nicholas Easton, a founder of Newport, first settled in the area in the 17th century. Easton's heirs divided the property into lots in 1725 and sold parcels to many of Newport's early tradesmen and merchants. Many of the early inhabitants attended the nearby Quaker Meeting House or Touro Synagogue. None of the streets were originally named after people because of a Quaker tradition, so 1st (now Washington), 2nd, and 3rd Streets were intersected by streets with tree names (Elm, Poplar, Willow, Walnut, Chestnut, Cherry, Pine, Sycamore, and Cypress). Marsh Street was formerly the site of a marsh, and Bridge Street was the site of a bridge traversing the north side of the marsh. Long Wharf jutted across the south side of the marsh until it was filled in the 19th century.

In 1723, Gravelly Point (off of Long Wharf) was the site of the largest public mass execution in American history, when 26 pirates were executed. They were then buried on nearby Goat Island.[2]

Various houses in “The Point” were occupied by British and French forces during the American Revolution around the time of the Battle of Rhode Island. The famous Goddard and Townsend furniture makers lived and worked in The Point, and their houses still remain.1 Battery Park was created from Fort Greene, a former military battery from the War of 1812, on the site of a previous battery from the American Revolution.[3][4]

Revitalization

Newport has remained largely unindustrialized, so many of the historic colonial houses were not demolished, as was done in Boston and New York. As a result, Newport allegedly has the highest concentration of colonial homes of any American city. The Point, however, was largely neglected by the 1950s and remained a working class area. In the 1960s and 70s, Doris Duke's Newport Restoration Foundation bought 27 historic houses in The Point, restored them, and currently rents the homes to tenants. In the 1960s, the construction of the Newport Bridge divided the neighborhood in two.

The Point is home to the Hunter House museum, the Rumbline Restaurant, and Saint John the Evangelist Anglican-Catholic Church.2 The old docks disappeared at the end of the streets but the driftways remained, allowing public access to the harbor for boaters.3

Images

Image:Goddard House Newport Rhode Island.jpg|18th century Second Street home of the Goddard family (of Townsend and Goddard furniture) Image:Tripp House Newport.JPG|Tripp House stone-ender, 1720, on Washington Street Image:Newport Harbor Light in Newport, Rhode Island (2008).jpg|Newport Harbor Light (1842) on northern tip of Goat Island and the Newport Bridge Image:Tom Robinson Vicomte De Noailles House.jpg|Home of Quaker Tom Robinson and his descendants since 1759, headquarters of French Vicomte de Noailles 1780-1781 Image:Captain John Warren French Artillery Headquarters House Newport RI.jpg|Home of Captain John Warren, built in 1737, Headquarters of French Artillery 1780-1781 Image:Hunter House Newport Rhode Island.jpg|Hunter House Image:Saint John Church Newport Rhode Island.jpg|Saint John the Evangelist Church (Anglican) on Washington Street Image:Driftway Washington Street Newport Rhode Island.jpg|A public access driftway on Washington Street in The Point Image:Washington Street house, Newport, RI.jpg|Washington Street house, home to a Quaker family

References and external links

-   Saint John the Evangelist Church in the Point
-   Christine Dunn, “Newport’s the Point: A mingling of mansions, modest residences,” _Providence Journal,_ April 8, 2008
-   Point pictures and info

[1] Providence Journal, 4/6/09

[2]

[3] Fort Greene (Newport) at American Forts Network

[4] North Battery at American Forts Network

title: Easton's Point

question: Summarize what happened in the 1720s.

answer: The Easton heirs divided the property into lots and sold parcels to many of Newport's early tradesmen and merchants. In 1723, Gravelly Point was the site of the largest public mass execution in American history, when 26 pirates were executed.

critique: The execution is irrelevant to the question.

critique: The answer should mention the execution of the pirates.

question: What was the reason behind naming the place 'The Point'?

answer: The place was named 'The Point' because it was the site of the largest public mass execution in American history.

critique: The answer should be clearer about the fact that the place is named after the point of land that juts out into the harbour.

critique: The answer is not a complete reason for the name "the point".

critique: The answer is not related to the question.

critique: "because it was the site of the largest public mass execution in American history." - this is incorrect. The place was named after Nicholas Easton, a founder of Newport.

critique: The answer should mention that the name is a reference to the geographical location.

question: Summarize the reason behind the presence of colonial houses in Newport.

answer: As Newport has remained largely unindustrialized, the colonial houses weren't demolished as was done in Boston and New York.

critique: The answer should mention the high concentration of colonial houses.

critique: The answer should mention the high concentration of colonial houses in Newport.

critique: The answer doesn't mention why the colonial houses weren't demolished.

critique: The reason the houses are still there is a bit vague so this should be clearer.


text:
PAT MCLAUGHLIN is a singer/songwriter based in Nashville, Tennessee.

He was raised in Waterloo, Iowa, but moved to San Francisco, California in the early 1970s. There McLaughlin began to write songs, playing alone at open mic nights and in the streets near the bay. After a brief stint in Boston, he moved to Nashville where he formed a band and released his first album in 1980. Two consecutive projects for Capitol Records followed. His first major label album _Pat McLaughlin_ made its debut in 1988.[1]

In the late 1980s, McLaughlin experienced his first mainstream country music success when Steve Wariner recorded McLaughlin's song “Lynda”. Wariner's version climbed to the top of the charts, winning McLaughlin his first BMI Country Award in 1988.[2] In 1992, Tanya Tucker and Delbert McClinton had a hit with McLaughlin's “Tell Me About It” — another BMI award resulted from this song.[3] During his years in New Orleans, McLaughlin also released records produced by Jim Rooney (Hal Ketchum) and Ben Keith (Neil Young).

In 1997 along with former Subdudes members Tommy Malone and Johnny Ray Allen plus drummer Kenneth Blevins, McLaughlin formed Tiny Town. The quartet recorded one self-titled album, produced by Bernie Leadon in 1998.[4] McLaughlin's compositions have been recorded by artists including Bonnie Raitt, Alan Jackson, Taj Mahal, Trisha Yearwood, Al Kooper, Nanci Griffith, Josh Turner, Gary Allan, Shawn Camp and Don Williams.

Gary Allan recorded McLaughlin's “Songs About Rain” in 2003, securing yet another BMI Country Award for McLaughlin. Allan's 2010 release, _Get off the Pain_, includes two McLaughlin co-writes: “I Think I've Had Enough” and “When You Give Yourself Away.”

As a studio musician he has contributed guitar to projects by Jamie Hartford, Rosanne Cash, Julie Roberts, Don Williams, Al Cooper, Shawn Camp, Cowboy Jack Clement, Neil Diamond, Johnny Cash and many more.[5]

2010 has found McLaughlin continuing his monthly gigs at Douglas Corner Cafe in Nashville. In spring 2010 he was featured on “Jammin' at Hippie Jacks,” which airs on select public television stations across the U.S. He has also been performing with songwriters Shawn Camp and Al Anderson (formerly of NRBQ) in a band called The World Famous Headliners. There has been some speculation that a World Famous Headliners CD will be released while McLaughlin's website also makes note that a solo CD and DVD are forthcoming.

In November 2010 Pat McLaughlin appeared as an opening act for John Prine. “Summer's End,”[6] a song McLaughlin wrote with Prine, was The Americana Music Association 2019 Song of the Year.[7]

Discography

Albums

  Year   Album                       Label
  ------ --------------------------- ------------
  1988   _Pat McLaughlin_            Capitol
  1992   _Party at Pat’s_            Appaloosa
  1994   _Unglued_                   Dos
  1995   _Get Out and Stay Out_      Dos
  1996   _Wind It On Up_             Appaloosa
  2000   _Uncle Pat_                 Evangeline
  2003   _Next Five Miles_           Creamstyle
  2006   _Horsefly_                  Creamstyle
  2011   _Live in 09_                Creamstyle
  2011   _Live at the Coupe_ (DVD)   Creamstyle

[1] Pat McLaughlin :: Official Website

[2] [ allmusic ((( Pat McLaughlin > Credits ))) ]

[3] BMI.com

[4]

[5]

[6] Summer's End video

[7] Official Website of The Americana Music Association

title: Pat McLaughlin

question: Summarize Pat McLaughlin's experiences playing with other musicians.

answer: He was raised in Waterloo, Iowa, but moved to San Francisco, California in the early 1970s and there played alone at open mic nights and in the streets near the bay. He moved to Nashville in the early 1980s where he formed a band and released his first album in 1980. He experienced mainstream country music success in the late 1980s when Steve Wariner recorded McLaughlin's song "Lynda." In 1997, McLaughlin formed Tiny Town with former Subdudes band members Tommy Malone and Johnny Ray Allen, as well as drummer Kenneth Blevins. As a studio musician he has contributed guitar to projects by Jamie Hartford, Rosanne Cash, Julie Roberts, Don Williams, Al Cooper, Shawn Camp, Cowboy Jack Clement, Neil Diamond, Johnny Cash, and many more.

critique: The response mentions McLaughlin's experiences playing alone in San Francisco, however there is no evidence supporting this.

critique: The response contains irrelevant information.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The only mention of collaborating with someone is with Gary Allan, who recorded McLaughlin's "Songs About Rain" in 2003. This song won a BMI prize, so it's probably the most prominent collaboration McLaughlin has experienced. Include this song in the list of collaborative players.

critique: The answer should mention McLaughlin's co-writing credits.

critique: The answer should mention McLaughlin's work with John Prine.

question: Summarize McLaughlin's career during the 1980s.

answer: McLaughlin moved to Nashville in the early '70s, where he formed a band. He released his first album in 1980. Two consecutive projects for Capitol Records followed. He experienced his first mainstream success when Steve Wariner recorded his song "Lynda," which climbed to the top of the charts.

critique: The answer omits McLaughlin's first major label album.

critique: It's omitted that he received his first BMI Country Award for "Lynda".

critique: Doesn't mention the other songs he wrote that were recorded by other artists.

critique: "He experienced his first mainstream success when Steve Wariner recorded his song "Lynda," which climbed to the top of the charts." - this is incorrect. It was in the late 1980s when McLaughlin experienced his first mainstream country music success.

critique: The answer should mention McLaughlin's BMI Country Award.

question: What does the article say about McLaughlin's musical inspirations?

answer: No answer

critique: It is omitted that there is no information given in the article about where McLaughlin's inspirations draw from.

question: Summarize the different venues McLaughlin has played at.

answer: In his early years he has been playing at open mic nights, playing street music in San Francisco, and had a brief stint in Boston. Since moving to Nashville he has been performing regularly. These days he can be seen playing at Douglas Corner Cafe and he frequently performs on public television. He was also part of the songwriters Shawn Camp and Al Anderson on the band The World Famous Headliners.

critique: The answer should mention the John Prine concert.

critique: "These days he can be seen playing at Douglas Corner Cafe and he frequently performs on public television. He was also part of the songwriters Shawn Camp and Al Anderson on the band The World Famous Headliners." - this is incorrect. McLaughlin was never part of the songwriters Shawn Camp and Al Anderson. He was part of The World Famous Headliners.

critique: Remove the detail "he can be seen playing at Douglas Corner Cafe and he frequently performs on public television" as it is not a proper venue for his description.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The answer should mention his appearance as an opening act for John Prine.


text:
I look down at my feet, swinging them back and forth because my legs can’t reach the ground. It’s dark, and my seat is wet with a mixture of old rain and early-morning dew. I’m tired; I’ve been awake all night. I’m cold; there’s a slight breeze that I hadn’t noticed before now. But I am not afraid. Back to the West, over my shoulder, the sky is dark as night. Clouds that drenched the previous day with rain are passing off into the distance, leaving a shining trail of puddles and wet pavement like an enormous snail. Toward the horizon in front of me, however, I see the sky is clear, and just starting to brighten.

I feel the cool breeze again, and I shift uncomfortably. I hear the faint crinkling of paper. I reach into my jacket and pull out the incomplete letter. I unfold it carefully, making no sudden movements, and press it flat against my thigh. I pull a pen out of my other jacket pocket, and study the blank space after the word “Dear.” I wrote this final letter after two rough drafts, but I can’t think of who I wrote it for. My parents are long dead. I have no friends, no other family. No one to apologize to. I can’t say goodbye to any loved ones, but hopefully I’ll get to say hello to a few.

I glance at my watch. Twenty minutes after five. I set my pen down beside me and fold my letter, placing it back in my jacket pocket, the salutation still incomplete. I look down at my swinging legs again. I remember when I used to climb the tree in our back yard, and sit with my feet dangling. In my young imagination I’d always thought that tree was as tall as a skyscraper. I lean forward a few inches and look down through my dangling feet at the sidewalk forty-two stories below. I hope I get to see my parents again.

I very carefully hold the edge of the building as I get my feet under me, and very slowly stand up. The sun will be rising soon, and I want to see it one more time.

I stand up very carefully and look forward, toward the East. I can see the rim of the bright orange sun peeking over the horizon, drawing long shadows from all the buildings. I sigh and say a silent prayer. I ask God to understand why I want this. Why I need this. I hope he’ll forgive me, or at least let me see my family, just once, just for a moment. I miss my mom, and my dad.

I can feel tears starting to flow; not for me, but for my family. I want to tell them I love them, and that I’m sorry for what I’m doing. Maybe I’ll get to.

I can’t see the sun anymore, my tears have blurred it too much, but I can still feel its warm rays on my face. I turn slowly away from the light. I extend my arms straight out on either side, then immediately feel stupid and lower them again. I settle for keeping my hands about six inches from my pockets, palms facing forward. I wipe my eyes and look down to see the heels of my shoes are hanging off the edge, before my eyesight blurs again. I lift my gaze again, wipe my eyes one last time, and slowly lean backward, inch by inch. When gravity finally takes hold, it catches me by surprise and I hunch forward as my body instinctively tries to save itself, but it’s too late. I can only face up toward the clear sky, which is framed by buildings that seem to be shooting upward. And then I’m gone.

title: My first short story

question: What is the narrator preparing to do?

answer: Jump off a building

critique: The narrator is not jumping off the building. He is preparing to do so.

critique: The narrator is not preparing to jump off a building. He is preparing to commit suicide by jumping off a building.

question: What is the purpose of the letter and why does the narrator not complete it?

answer: The letter is a suicide note. The narrator does not complete it because they are unsure who to address it to.

critique: The narrator is not unsure who to address the letter to.

critique: It is not stated that the letter is a suicide note.

critique: The narrator is not unsure who to address the letter to. He has no one to address it to.

question: How did the narrator's parents die?

answer: That information can't be found.

critique: "That information can't be found." - is incorrect because it can be found: the narrator says their parents are long dead.

critique: Atheist parents aren't really dying, so the question is if it was suicide (or simply something like old age). The narrator committing suicide does not answer that question.

critique: The information is not given in the text, but it is implied that their parents died in the past.

critique: The information is not found in the passage, but it is implied that they died in a car accident.


text:
MYKHAYLO FOMENKO (; born 19 September 1948) is a Ukrainian former association footballer and former head coach of the Ukraine national team.[1] As a player, he was capped 24 times for the Soviet Union,[2] and, as a head coach, became the second ever manager – after Oleh Blokhin – to take Ukraine to an international finals tournament, reaching UEFA Euro 2016.

Fomenko was famous for his coaching in Dynamo Kyiv, winning its first Ukrainian gold medals for the club, first Ukrainian Cup for the club and most notably, defeating Barcelona in the first leg of the Champions League tournament. Barcelona, under Johan Cruyff and with such star players as Ronald Koeman and Pep Guardiola, ended up to be finalist of that UEFA Champions League season.

Career

Playing

Fomenko was an integral part of Dynamo Kyiv's achievements in the 1970s at the club level, which included hoisting the 1975 Winners Cup and Super Cup.[3]

Coaching

After graduating the Higher School of Coaches in Moscow in 1979, Fomenko has coached numerous Ukrainian clubs, most notably Dynamo Kyiv. With Fomenko the club won its first Ukrainian gold medals, first Ukrainian Cup both in 1993 and most notably, beating Barcelona in the very first leg of the Champions League tournament. Barcelona ended up to be finalist of that 39th season of the UEFA Champions League. Before that success, in the end of 1989, he promoted Georgian club Guria Lanchkhuti to the Soviet Top league and in 2001 reached Ukrainian Cup final with CSKA Kyiv what is the best result in club's history.

On 26 December 2012, Fomenko was given a one-year contract – with a possible second-year extension – as head coach of Ukraine national team[4] after the Football Federation of Ukraine had failed to retain Harry Redknapp and Sven-Göran Eriksson for the role.[5] Fomenko coached Ukraine to six 2014 FIFA World Cup qualification wins, coming against Poland (twice), Moldova, Montenegro, San Marino and France, as well as one draw against England.

After placing second in their qualifying group, Ukraine was matched against France in the second round of UEFA qualifiers. Despite winning the first leg 2–0 at home, Ukraine fell 3–0 away to lose 3–2 on aggregate, thus failing to make the 2014 World Cup finals. Despite this, Fomenko indicated he would like to continue is his role and lead Ukraine in its UEFA Euro 2016 qualifying campaign, and on 6 February 2014, the Football Federation of Ukraine announced it had extended his contract until the end of 2015.[6]

Fomenko ultimately led Ukraine to successful qualification to the Euro 2016 finals in France after finishing in third place in its qualifying group, setting up a playoff matchup against Slovenia. Here, Ukraine won 3–1 on aggregate to ensure the nation's spot in France. Fomenko subsequently extended his contract to coach Ukraine up to Euro 2016 until 30 July 2016, though he was promised another extension should Ukraine perform well at Euro 2016. Ukraine, however, had a disastrous tournament, losing all three group stage matches, including a defeat against the then world champions Germany (0–2) and, most shockingly, a loss to Northern Ireland (0–2), which sent Ukraine to an early exit.

Honours

Player

Club

-   Soviet Top League (3): 1974, 1975, 1977
-   Soviet Cup (2): 1974, 1978
-   UEFA Cup Winners' Cup: 1975
-   UEFA Super Cup: 1975

International

-   UEFA European Championship

:* Runner-up: 1972

-   Olympic Games

:* Bronze: 1976

Manager

-   Ukrainian Top League: 1993
-   Ukrainian Cup

:* Winner: 1993

:* Runner-up: 2001

Managerial statistics

    __

  Team      From            To        Record
  --------- --------------- --------- -------- -------
  G         W               D         L
  Ukraine   December 2012   present
  Total

[1] Ukraine's football federation taps Fomenko to coach national team, Kyiv Post (26 December 2012)

[2]

[3]

[4]

[5]

[6] Fomenko to continue working with Ukraine's national football team until end of 2015, Interfax-Ukraine (6 February 2014)

title: Mykhaylo Fomenko

question: Describe Mykhalo Fomenko's sports career.

answer: Fomenko was an integral part of Dynamo Kyiv's achievements in the 1970s at the club level, which included hoisting the 1975 Winners Cup and Super Cup. He has coached numerous Ukrainian clubs, most notably Dynamo Kyiv. He promoted Georgian club Guria Lanchkhuti to the Soviet Top league and in 2001 reached Ukrainian Cup final with CSKA Kyiv. Fomenko became the second ever manager to take Ukraine to an international finals tournament, reaching UEFA Euro 2016.

critique: The italicized text is not relevant enough to the question.

critique: The response should include the fact that Fomenko was capped 24 times for the Soviet Union.

critique: The answer should mention his time as a player.

critique: "He promoted Georgian club Guria Lanchkhuti to the Soviet Top league and in 2001 reached Ukrainian Cup final with CSKA Kyiv." - this is irrelevant and should be removed.

critique: The answer should mention that he was capped 24 times for the Soviet Union.

question: Describe the team Fomenko coached for.

answer: In the 2012-2014 period of time where Fomenko coached the Ukraine national team, the team failed to make it to the 2014 World Cup finals. It was at this same period that Fomenko made it to the UEFA Euro 2016.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: It is irrelevant that Fomenko made it to the UEFA Euro 2016.

critique: The response is missing some key details about the team Fomenko coached.

critique: The second sentence is irrelevant to the question.

critique: The response is missing the part where Fomenko led the Ukraine national team to qualify for the UEFA Euro 2016.

critique: The second half of the answer describes Fomenko's career, not the team

question: Describe Fomenko's coaching.

answer: He coached numerous Ukrainian clubs, most notably Dynamo Kyiv. He won the club's first Ukrainian gold medals, first Ukrainian Cup, and most notably, beating Barcelona in the first leg of the Champions League tournament.

critique: Does not mention defeating Poland or France in 2014 World Cup qualification..

critique: Doesn't mention the Ukrainian national team.

critique: Does not mention the Ukrainian national team.

critique: Doesn't mention his coaching of the Ukraine national team.

critique: The answer should mention his coaching of the Ukraine national team.

critique: Doesn't mention the UEFA tournament he took Ukraine to.


text:
PAUL JOANNIDES (born 4 November 1945, London) is Professor in the History of Art in the University of Cambridge.[1]

Career

Joannides is employed by the Dept. of History of Art at the University of Cambridge. He was Assistant Lecturer 1973-1978, lecturer 1978-2002 and reader in art history 2002-2004. He has been working as Professor of art history since 2004. He was chargé de mission of the Musée du Louvre from 1991 to 1992. He is member of the Société de l'Histoire de l'Art Français.

Work

Joannides completed his PhD on the French Romantic painter Eugène Delacroix under Professor Lee Johnson.

He is best known for his numerous academic articles on Italian renaissance artists and on the French romantic painters in specialist art magazines like The Burlington Magazine and Apollo.

Books published by him

-   _The Drawings of Raphael_, Phaidon Press 1983.[2]
-   _Masaccio and Masolino_, Phaidon Press, 1993.[3]
-   _Titian to 1518: The Assumption of Genius_, Yale University Press, 2001.[4]

Books co-edited by him

-   _Reactions to the Master: Responses to Michelangelo in the sixteenthcentury_, co-edited with Francis Ames-Lewis, Ashgate Press, 2003.[5]

Exhibition catalogues

-   _Michelangelo and his Influence_, exhibition of 68 drawings for the Royal Collection, circulated in three venues in the United States and two in the UK, October 1996-April 1998, The National Gallery of Art, Washington and Lund Humphries, London, 1996.[6]
-   _Raphael and His Age - Drawings from the Palais des Beaux-Arts, Lille_, exhibition of 57 drawings shown at the Cleveland Museum of Art, and the Palais des Beaux-Arts, Lille, 2002-2003. Published in English and in French by the Cleveland Museum of Art and the Réunion des Musées.[7][8]
-   _Late Raphael_, (co-curated with Tom Henry), exhibition at the Prado and Musée du Louvre 2012-2013.

Collection Catalogues

-   _Michel-Ange, Ecole, Copistes, Inventaire des Dessins Italiens_, Musée du Louvre, Réunion des Musées Nationaux, 2003.[9]
-   _The Drawings by Michelangelo and his followers in the Ashmolean Museum_, Oxford, CUP, 2007.[10][11]

Personal life

His second wife was art historian Marianne Ysobel Joannides, née Sachs, who died of cancer aged 61 at home in Saffron Walden on 23 March 2007.[12] She had taught history of art at the University of Kent at Canterbury, and was latterly employed at Bonhams auctioneers in London as a consultant in old master drawings. Whilst working at Phillips Auctioneers in 1994 she arranged a loan exhibition in London of Master Drawings from the De Pass Collection, Royal Cornwall Museum, Truro (Catalogue ).

[1] University of Cambridge (2008). _Paul Joannides_. Cambridge: University of Cambridge. Accessed 27 April 2008.

[2]

[3]

[4]

[5]

[6]

[7]

[8] Book Country (2008). _Raphael and His Age - Drawings from the Palais Des Beaux-arts, Lille. _. Mount Vernon: Book Country. Accessed 27 April 2008.

[9]

[10]

[11] Book Country (2008). _The Drawings Of Michelangelo And His Followers In The Ashmolean Museum. _. Mount Vernon: Book Country. Accessed 27 April 2008.

[12] http://announcements.telegraph.co.uk/deaths/56726/joannides

title: Paul Joannides (art historian)

question: Summarize Joannides' career.

answer: He was Assistant Lecturer from 1973-1978, Lecturer from 1978-2002, and Reader in art history from 2002-2004. He has been working as Professor of art history since 2004. He was chargé de mission of the Musée du Louvre from 1991-1992. He is member of the Société de l'Histoire de l'Art Français.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

question: What books has Joannides' published?

answer:
- The Drawings of Raphael, Phaidon Press, 1983
- Masaccio and Masolino, Phaidon Press, 1993
- Titian to 1518: The Assumption of Genius, Yale University Press, 2001
- Reactions to the Master: Responses to Michelangelo in the sixteenth century, co-edited with Francis Ames-Lewis, Ashgate Press, 2003
- Late Raphael, co-curated with Tom Henry, exhibition at the Prado and Musée du Louvre, 2012-2013

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

question: Describe Joannides' personal life.

answer: Joannides' second wife was art historian Marianne Ysobel Joannides, née Sachs. She died of cancer at home in Saffron Walden on March 23, 2007. She had taught history of art at the University of Kent at Canterbury, and was employed at Bonhams auctioneers in London as a consultant in old master drawings.

critique: The text doesn't say Joannides was married before he was.

critique: The answer should mention that Joannides' wife was 61 when she died.


text:
The image of investing needs a makeover. On May 9, 2017, a group of determined and motivated peers met at The Battery in San Francisco for the first ever SHATTER SUMMIT. Hosted by the influential entrepreneur Shelly Kapoor Collins of the Shatter Fund, this gathering focused on one simple yet bold move: _investing in women_. Here are key takeaways from the groundbreaking event that gathered the Bay Area's most influential women under one roof.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - May 9 - Chrystine Lawson, Kara Goldin, Samantha Walravens and Suzanne... [+] DiBianca attend Shatter Summit on May 9th 2017 at The Battery Club in San Francisco, California

Photo - Drew Altizer Photography

DO THE MATH! HOW EMPOWERING WOMEN IN LEADERSHIP PAYS OFF.

Shockingly, merely 30 years ago, women needed a male relative to co-sign for a business loan. The Women’s Business Ownership Act of 1988 proclaimed the long overdue gender equality in access to capital required for business ownership. Unfortunately, there is still a serious deficit in the number of women getting investments and women investors in the market.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - May 9 - Shelly Kapoor Collins and Tina Sharkey attend Shatter Summit on... [+] May 9th 2017 at The Battery Club in San Francisco, California

Photo - Ando Caulfield for Drew Altizer Photography

According to Shelly Kapoor Collins, Principal of the Shatter Fund, of the top 100 ventures and micro-venture firms, only 7% have women as investing partners. In 2010-2015, only 10% of venture dollars and 15% of seed dollars went to startups with at least one woman founder. A 2007 Catalyst study showed that when a woman is on the executive team of a startup, the returns are 66% greater than those credited to an all-male team. These numbers do not add up! There is clear economic advantage and incentive in empowering women in business leadership.

START EARLY! HOW ENTREPRENEURIAL MINDSET IS SHAPED.

Several “women who shatter” shared their stories to inspire future gender-unbiased investments. Jennifer Siebel Newsom, the Stanford graduate and co-founder of The Representation Project, delivered the keynote address. She told the story of how her two sons had received special birthday presents, including a note from the White House encouraging them with the idea that they could be future presidents.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - May 9 - Jennifer Siebel Newsom attends Shatter Summit on May 9th 2017 at... [+] The Battery Club in San Francisco, California

Photo - Ando Caulfield for Drew Altizer Photography

Meanwhile, her two daughters got no such grand rhetorical gestures, but were showered with a “pool of Pepto-Bismol pink” gifts. The goal is to rewrite this limiting and damaging narrative and teach girls that they are equal from day one. It is a basic idea that is catching more and more traction in the business world. For example, Craig Newmark, founder of Craigslist and supporter of Girls Who Code and the Global Fund for Women, vowed to “stand up for it and to do so relentlessly, for as long as [he] lives.”

IT TAKES A VILLAGE! HOW GENDER-NEUTRAL NETWORKING POWERS SUCCESS.

Despite many signs of social progress, the number of women among venture capitalists has decreased from 10% to 6% since 1999. Two powerful discussions addressed this disconcerting turn of events. Nancy Pfund of DBL Partners, Linnea Roberts, advisory director to _Goldman Sachs_, and Kim Rubey, Head of Communications at _Airbnb,_ championed the notion of encouraging women to be door openers, not gatekeepers for each other in the industry. The sentiment was echoed by Hare Goldin, founder of Hint Water, journalist Samantha Walravens, and Suzanne DiBianca, the EVP of Salesforce. “Not all unicorns are Uber and not all tech entrepreneurs are white guys out of Stanford”. Smart investment is not just about the money, but also about time commitments and mentorship opportunities.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - May 9 - Shelly Kapoor Collins, Nancy Pfund, Kim Rubey and Linnea Roberts... [+] attend Shatter Summit on May 9th 2017 at The Battery Club in San Francisco, California

Photo - Drew Altizer Photography

SAY IT OUT LOUD! HOW AFFIRMATIONS EMBOLDEN LEADERS.

Nurturing is inseparable from growth. The principle applies to nature, relationships and business. Nurture and self-care were a common denominator for presenters Dave Morin and Tina Sharkey. Morin is launching Sunrise, a project to help people “have their minds taken as care of as much as their bodies”. It’s mission to is tackle depression and reduce suffering (among business professionals as well), and work holistically with natural brain powers.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - May 9 - Alison Pincus and Dave Morin attend Shatter Summit on May 9th... [+] 2017 at The Battery Club in San Francisco, California

Photo - Drew Altizer Photography

Tina Sharkey, founder of Brandless and former president of BabyCenter and Sherpa Foundry, focused her presentation on access to non-monetary resources like people, tool and knowhow. The important thing is to have the courage to speak up and ask. Sharkey offered a powerful affirmation: “Remember, you can have your values and have great value.”

P.S. ABOUT THAT MILE IN HER SHOES…

Leading by example is the surefire way to make a lasting impact. Tamara Mellon, co-founder of _Jimmy Choo_ and now of her eponymous shoe line, saw an opportunity in the market and had the confidence to go after it. As the accessories editor for _British Vogue_, she was tired of limited shoe options for styling during photo shoots, so she convinced Jimmy Choo to launch one of the most successful footwear companies to date. Her own line is by women, for women and sold direct-to-women, meaning it has no markups.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA - May 9 - Tamara Mellon and Alison Pincus attend Shatter Summit on May 9th... [+] 2017 at The Battery Club in San Francisco, California

Photo - Drew Altizer

Her main takeaway from prior business ventures is “what is incredibly important is having the right people around you, who want to execute your vision.” Learning from one’s own experience and constantly striving for more equal footing is an honorable goal for the global business community.

_This story was co-authored with Justice McNeil, MA Fashion Journalism, the Academy of Art University._

question: What does the article say about inequality between men and women?

answer: In the past, women needed a male relative to co-sign for a business loan. The Women’s Business Ownership Act of 1988 proclaimed the long overdue gender equality in access to capital required for business ownership. However, there is still a serious deficit in the number of women getting investments and women investors in the market.

critique: The answer should mention that only 7% of the top 100 ventures and micro-venture firms have women as investing partners.

critique: The answer should mention the numbers of women in venture capital.

critique: The answer should mention the statistics.

critique: Incorrectly refers to it in the past tense (it was thirty years ago).

question: Summarize the historial context the article provides.

answer: The article provides a summary of the past 30 years of gender equality in business loans. It states that women needed a male relative to co-sign for a business loan 30 years prior. The article then discusses the Women's Business Ownership Act of 1988, which provided gender equality in access to capital required for business ownership.

critique: The response is in a made-up historical context. It is inaccurate that 30 years after the act women still needed a male relative for signatures for a business loan.

question: What does the article say about racism in the business world?

answer: No answer

critique: The answer should mention that the article does not mention anything about racism in the business world.

critique: No answer is given, but there is evidence in the article that suggests that racism isn't uncommon in the business world.

question: What does the article say about specific businesses?

answer: No answer

critique: The article mentions a few specific businesses.

critique: The article mentions the founders of two businesses.

critique: The answer should mention that the article does not mention any specific businesses.

critique: The answer could mention that Tiffany's Sunrise and Brandless are introduced as businesses run by inspiring women.


text:
It was a cold, dark night…

	I lay in the corner of the street, my head in a puddle, a smell of what can only be described as death circling my very presence. I had lost count of how many days it had been, of how many faces I’ve seen pass me, of how many feet I’ve watched shuffle aside, trying their hardest to avoid my very existence. Of how many eyes had looked at me, and burnt hatred so deep it became almost intolerable. Sheer disgust, seeping out of the breath of everyone who passed. That is what my life had become. Ever since that one day. When everything I thought I knew was ripped apart in front of me.

	It was the youngest who took me in. He seemed kind, welcomed me. One of those people that deep down you can tell had a good heart even if they hid it beneath a rough, silent exterior. I lived in his room free to do what I felt, unless the others were around, the older ones. When their voices carried through the door, I was hidden under the bed, its so our friendship will be ours alone I would convince myself, that he wanted me to be all his. But I suppose that should have been the first warning sign. Can a place truly be called your home if you have to hide from its very inhabitants? But sadly, I was naive… no, I chose to ignore it, I was too obsessed, too caught up by this newfound friendship to ever even consider the truth. I thought everything was perfect. Then it happened.  It was late at night, the door slammed behind him as the boy tumbled in. Raised voices instantly burnt through the very walls that surrounded me, through the doors, through everything. I had heard anger in those voices before, the times when I hid, but nothing like this, this was… new. The door crashed open, the boy collapsing to the ground. Eyes bloodshot, his mouth lined with dry, cracked vomit, his shirt, blooded, torn and stained. A sight that I wished I would never see again. As he hit the ground, he looked up at me, but there was no affection any more, just pure emptiness. I heard the voices come closer. There was no time to hide, no time to be hidden. Voices entered the room; eyes were cast down the decrepit shell lying on the floor, then to me. Hatred. Rough hands were placed on me, words crying out that I was to blame, that somehow, this was my entire fault. My protests, my cries of defense, all fell on deaf ears. No matter how much I pleaded, no matter how many times I cried out to them that there was more to me, more I could give to them, it was all to no avail. I was tossed out on the street, my once home fading in my eyesight as I tumbled, seemingly forever, sinking in to my own personal abyss.

	An icy wind blew threw me, bringing me back from the horrid memory. I rolled onto my side, no longer sure if it was by my own personal doing or if I simply lacked the strength to offer any resistance. This is it, I thought to myself. This is how it is going to end. All the things I could have done, the places I could have seen, and now this will become my final resting place, a blotch in the street, surrounded by the ear wrecking sound of traffic and drunks. Some rest indeed. Through all the noise, I heard footsteps walking towards me. No doubt to impose some form of abuse towards me in my final moments I had thought. But no, a hand rested on my body. Warmth that I had not felt since… the boy? I turned around and stared up, locking eyes with an unfamiliar face. It was irrelevant. This man has picked me up in my time of need. He had saved me.

	He took me to some form of haven for my kind. After I adjusted to the contrast of light, I looked around and saw countless amounts of those in the same position as me. It was amazing. I was no longer a freak. No longer an outcast, I was amongst my own kind at last. The time I spent there was the happiest of my life. On occasions, members of our private little community would be taken away by strangers from the outside, I had lost a few good friends through that, but even then the kind man would always bring in new members, new friends to be made, stories to be heard, connections to be formed. I should have learnt. All good things must come to a pass.

	The horrendous noise sounded, the noise that sounded the arrival of a stranger. As usual, our host welcomed the man with open arms, allowing him to take his pick of who he wanted. The stranger cast his eyes along the crowd, passing by everyone I knew, his gaze nonchalant to all. All that is, except me. He looked straight at me, and stopped. Eyes bloodshot, his mouth lined with dry, cracked vomit, his shirt, blooded, torn and stained. The memory flooded through me. It was then I realized just how blind I had been. The night that changed it all, it had not been emptiness in the boy’s eyes. It had been lust! And it was lust again the bore its way inside my soul. The stranger had chosen. I wouldn’t be saying goodbye to a friend this time. I would be saying goodbye to everything.

	The door opened to his building. And a building it would always be, never a home. No place with so much vile hatred seeping out of every crack in the wall, so much murk and gloom pouring out of every shadow, could ever be called a home. He sat in front of me, breathing his horrid breath over my neck, running his fingers down my body, inhaling my breath. I knew straight away, this was never going to end well. He lifted me, I felt weightless and powerless under his grasp. He put his lips around me, and it felt like he drank the very life force from my body. His brown, crusted teeth scraping against me, as his course tongue brought him to the satisfaction he had desired for so long. After what felt like an eternity in the lowest ring of hell, he was done. The door was opened, and for the second time in my life, I was cast out. This time however, there was no remorse. There was nothing. I was resound to my fate.

And that’s how I arrived here, lying once again in a gutter. This time, I know there will be no retribution. I can see my life flowing from my body. It’s coming to an end. If only things had been different. If only we really did have medicinal qualities, then maybe, just maybe, this wouldn’t be the end of just one more bottle of Buckfast.

title: The first story I wrote, 1196 words. Creative criticism is welcome. :)

question: What does the story say about the narrator's supposed friend and his family?

answer: The narrator was taken in by the youngest of the house, a boy who seemingly seemed kind and welcomed the narrator to his home. However, the narrator lived in the boy's room free to do what he felt, unless the others were around, the older ones. The narrator was hidden under the bed whenever the older ones were around. The narrator had heard anger in the voices of the boy's family before but nothing like this, and the narrator realizes that the boy's lust led him to want to abuse the narrator.

critique: The narrator was hidden from the older ones (presumably his family).

question: What does the story say about why the narrator was homeless and what happened to his own family?

answer: No answer

critique: The answer should mention that the story does not mention anything about the narrator's family.

critique: There is no direct statement; however, a source of homelessness is established: the narrator had been taken off the streets and hidden out of concern of anger and being judged by the other people within. The source of the domestic arguments is not gleaned.

critique: The answer should mention that the story does not mention the narrator's family.

critique: The answer is incorrect. The story does not mention anything about the narrator's family.

critique: The narrator was homeless and living with a boy. The boy's family cast him out after they found out about the narrator.

question: What does the story say about homosexuality?

answer: The narrator is a bottle of Buckfast. The narrator is hidden from the boy's roommates, but one day the boy comes home drunk and vomits blood. The boy's roommates blame the narrator for the boy's condition and throw it out. The narrator is picked up by a man who takes it to a shelter for its kind. The narrator feels happy and no longer an outcast. One day, a man picks the narrator up and takes it to his home. The narrator realizes the man is a homosexual and that the narrator was used to fulfill his sexual desires.

critique: The answer should mention the narrator's fate.

critique: The first sentence is irrelevant to the question.

critique: The answer is poorly written and doesn't answer the question.

critique: The question asks about homosexual not just the gender of the boy the narrator lived with and his sexuality.

critique: The narrator is not a bottle of Buckfast.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: The answer is a summary of the story, not a description of homosexuality.