text:
What happens when you can no longer look at yourself in the mirror? When you blind yourself to your self fabricated reality?
 The world is different from how you knew it, the colors are dulled, the sky clouded. Government is no longer exalted, communities are destroyed. The towns aren’t destroyed, the buildings stand, overtaken by nature. The concrete jungles, slowly crumbling, making way for new wildlife, populating their reclaimed property. The cities, once tall and lit up so brightly you could see them from space, rivaling the stars.
Humans are rare. few tribes were able to live after the fall. The older generation mostly gone, they couldn’t forget the luxuries that had past and gone. The young easily learned in adapting to new surroundings. They are a steadfast race, some more animal than man, but that’s probably the old ways still stuck in my mind.
 I don’t know what year it is, doesn’t matter, days don’t matter. The calendar is long past. The only time you need to know in this new world is dark, and then where to hide so you can sleep through the nightmares and make it to the light.
No one knows what is in the dark, if you are out when the light disappears, you disappear with it. Some of the last generation are close to adulthood. They know stories of vampires and werewolves, the dead returning to life. I’m not sure about any of that. I’ve never seen anything of the sort, and ive been around a long time to today’s standards, Well for all I know any standard I reckon.
My names’ ghost, that’s what I’m called in the new world. I do not know where I came from, I do not recall the old world. Though I know basic grammar and reading. I can write when the tools are available. I try to teach the few tribes around, so that they may be a little better off with such knowledge.
My face is slightly bearded, my hair is black though I have a grey streak the shape of a lightning bolt down the right side. A light scar under my rite eye and a slightly deeper one under my lip. I wear a leather jacket and dark jeans. I have a motorcycle. Its black and I call her Harley, since that’s what’s stamped on the tank. I carry a sword I made from various car parts and a cross bow I was lucky enough to find in a building I came across. I travel alone, village to village carrying a burden. I’m not sure why, I’m just compelled to do so. The burden is in a coffin. Matte black with silver struts across each side. I have never opened the coffin, so I do not know what’s inside. A voice from above that speaks to me when I’m alone, tells me to find the burden a place to rest, so I go.
I have one mission to put my burden to rest, and fear what lies in my future after it is done.

I ride and ride, deserted town to deserted town. I scavenge for what I cannot make myself. I teach the younger ones I come across the ways of my speech and writing. Most villages are kind enough but always weary of unknown people.
 The younger ones hide behind the older ones even though, they can be more brutal, the young have a lack of compassion, for the harshness of the world has taken it, it is harder to learn in the new days. Some wear rags as loin cloths some have animal skins for pants.
The older ones still speak my language but slightly altered to accommodate this life. I stop at a village in the middle of an old city to trade with them. They know and trust me here. They call this village farmers, due to the fact its written pn the walls here. A huge dome building concrete glass and steel make this a protected gaited village. I trade, I move on. Hunt, Hide.
 I dream of mirrors. I dream the mirrors are doorways to darkness. To make the true untrue. Looking in mirrors makes the light go away early and only shows darkness. I wake and I ride carrying the burden. Villages are disappearing. What was here is no more. The young ones are disappearing, the darkness is taking the survivors. What else could it be.
The voice speaks, it says don’t delay for the light is growing shorter find the sycamores. The grove to the east, to rest your burden. Fear grips me, knowing once my burden is lifted, I have no purpose. I am a remnant. An old piece of a new world. But I am obedient, I ride east to find the grove.
Three darks have past. The voice leads me to the place of resting burdens, the sycamore grove.
The grove shines brightly even in the day, the sea throws water to the beach, only to recede back to the depths of blue. Repeating for all time.
 The grove is glowing. I get off of Harley and wrap a chain around my burden. I carry her to the grove slowly dragging her to the glowing forest. The silence is deafening. The anxiety is cramping my chest. I am gripping the chains of my burden so tightly my fingers crack, pain shoots up my arms. The coffin digging a trail behind me . Rutting the old earth, that has been untouched for voice knows how long. Walking for a while, my hands bleed, the burden grows heavier. Sliding across the ancient earth rutting a trail. In front of me is a giant Sycamore. It is alive and green, sturdy to the touch, but hollowed. The voice speaks “REST THE BURDEN IN THE SYCAMORE’’. I did as the voice commanded. I pulled the burden up vertically. I pushed her into the tree. There was a loud shaking in the grove. The trees seemed to stay sturdy even though the ground was softening, pulling me in. “Help me” I scream. I am sorry I exclaim putting my weeping eyes into my hands. The voice thunders through the trees. Your burden is my burden, your coffin has receded out of the place, your burden is no more a bother to you, but your journey has only just begun. Glow with this knowledge. For everyone that trust in me can have the same weightlessness. Free of your burden, let it burn and forget it. Now ride and teach, to the young that the darkness is nothing to fear, for you learn more in the dark than you will in life. Ghost your name is now ChadRay Shish. Now glow amongst the young and teach them to burn burdens.

title: [sf]"The Burden and the Coffin"

question: What does the story say about how mirrors are made?

answer: No answer

critique: The response misses to mention that the story does not mention anything about how mirrors are made.

critique: The story does not mention how mirrors are made.

critique: The answer is not correct. The story does not say anything about how mirrors are made.

critique: The story hinted at the mirrors being made from darkness.

critique: There is no answer in the text, but the text does mention that looking in mirrors makes the light go away early and only shows darkness.

critique: The answer should mention that the story doesn't say anything about how mirrors are made.

question: What does the story say about the narrator, Ghost?

answer: Ghost is a man who has been around for a long time. He doesn't know where he came from, but he knows how to read and write. He has a scar under his right eye and a slightly deeper one under his lip. He wears a leather jacket and dark jeans. He has a motorcycle and calls it Harley. He carries a sword made from various car parts and a crossbow. He travels alone, village to village, carrying a burden. He doesn't know what's in the coffin, but he's compelled to find a place to rest it. He has one mission to put his burden to rest, and he fears what lies in his future after it's done.

critique: The response should include that Ghost is a remnant of the old world.

critique: The model's answer should include the information about the narrator's name.

critique: The answer should mention that Ghost is a remnant of the old world.

critique: The response should include that Ghost is called the narrator.

critique: Correct the detail about his scar under his right eye and lips

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: He knows what he's called in the new world.

text: It should be clearly stated that the burden Ghost is carrying is the coffin.

question: What does the text say about the world Ghost lives in?

answer: After the fall, only a few tribes were able to live. A majority of the generation had since overthrown. The younger generations barely remember what life was once like because they can't bare to live with the memories of the fallen cities. The ancestors still speak in the old language, a majority is dead or corrupted. A majority had passed, and a minority was still alive but fragmented. The cities stand slower and more dilapidated, the jungles reclaim their land, nature pushing its way back in.

critique: The response is missing some of the key details about the world Ghost lives in.

critique: The article doesn't mention a majority overthrowing. It only mentions that the elders are mostly gone.

critique: The response is missing a few key details about the world Ghost lives in.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

question: Summarize the climactic event of the story?

answer: The narrator, now ChadRay Shish, has gone to the Sycamore Grove to rest the burden. When he opens the coffin, he screams for help. The voice tells him that his burden is no more. He is told to ride and teach the young.

critique: The response is missing the part where the narrator is pulled into the tree.


split: train

text:
LEWELLYN FARR CHRISTENSEN[1] (May 6, 1909 – October 9, 1984)[2] was a ballet dancer, choreographer and director for many companies. He was largely associated with George Balanchine and the San Francisco Ballet, which he directed from 1952–1984. Other companies Christensen was a part of include Ballet Caravan, directed by Lincoln Kirstein, and Ballet Society, directed by Kirstein and Balanchine.[3]

Early life and training

Christensen was born in Brigham City, Utah, to a family with roots in dance and music. His grandfather, Lars Christensen, who emigrated from Denmark, taught folk and social dances.[4] Christensen was raised a Mormon, and this upbringing informed his latter career with of a sense of focusing on propriety.[5]

Christensen began studying dance with his uncles and music with his father when he was ten. He was taught early ballet technique by Stefano Mascagno, an Italian teacher. His brother Willam started Lew and their third dancing brother, Harold, in vaudeville. In addition to small vaudeville shows, the three brothers landed jobs in the Broadway musical _The Great Waltz_, during which time Christensen became a student at Balanchine's new School of American Ballet. In 1935, he joined the Metropolitan Opera's American Ballet Ensemble with Harold.[6]

Dancing with Balanchine

As soon as Christensen began his training, he received special attention from George Balanchine, who recognized his talent. Among Balanchine’s first lead male dancers, Christensen danced principal roles, receiving much praise for his lead roles in _Orpheus and Eurydice_ and _Apollon Musagète_.[7] Christensen, the first American to dance Apollo, set a new standard for that role, and was thereafter considered to be America's first home grown significant male dancer.[8]

At the onset of World War II, Lew Christensen was drafted into the United States Army. On return to New York in 1946 he joined Balanchine's and Kirstein's latest project, Ballet Society – later to be known as the New York City Ballet – where he became a ballet master. Although considered by many to be the logical heir to Balanchine's company, Christensen was instead enticed to join his brothers at the San Francisco Ballet in 1948.[9]

Ballet Caravan

Ballet Caravan, begun in 1936 by Kirstein, was intended to provide American ballet dancers with summer employment during off-seasons.[10] As a member, Christensen was a lead soloist, choreographer, and ballet master until 1940.

Between 1936 and 1941 ballets Christensen choreographed included _Pocahontas_ (1936), _Filling Station_ (1938), _Charade_ (1939), and _Pastorela_ (1941). _Filling Station_ incorporated Christensen's vaudeville roots, acrobats, deadpan humor, and tap dancing.

With Ballet Caravan, Christensen and his wife Gisella Caccialanza toured South America in 1941.[11]

San Francisco Ballet

Christensen served as associate director of the San Francisco Ballet in 1949, and was co-director in 1951 with his brother Willam. He served as director from 1952–1984.

Christensen transformed the San Francisco Ballet to an internationally recognized neoclassical company.[12] Although he joined the San Francisco Ballet in 1949, Christensen continued to act as ballet master for the New York City Ballet until 1950. After becoming co-director of the San Francisco company in 1951, he kept a good relationship between it and the New York City Ballet. In 1952, on his brother Willam's departure to establish the ballet program at the University of Utah, Lew became the director of the company. He choreographed over 110 works for the San Francisco Ballet. He brought impressive choreography from Balanchine to the company. With Christensen as director, San Francisco Ballet made its first tours nationally and internationally and received much acclaim.[13]

[1]

[2]

[3] Sowell, Debra. “Christensen Brothers.” _International Encyclopedia of Dance_. Vol. 2. ed. Selma Jeanne Cohen. 1998. 160–162.

[4] Sowell, Debra. “Christensen Brothers.” _International Encyclopedia of Dance._ Vol. 2. ed. Selma Jeanne Cohen. 1998. 160.

[5]

[6] Sowell, Debra. “Christensen Brothers.” _International Encyclopedia of Dance._ Vol. 2. ed. Selma Jeanne Cohen. 1998. 160–162.

[7]

[8] Sowell, Debra. “Christensen, Lew.” _International Dictionary of Ballet_. Vol. 1. ed. Martha Bremser. 1993. 277.

[9] Sowell, Debra. “Christensen, Lew.” _International Dictionary of Ballet._ Vol. 1. ed. Martha Bremser. 1993. 274–277.

[10] “Christensen Brothers.” _San Francisco Ballet._ 2008. San Francisco Ballet. Mar. 24, 2008 <http://www.sfballet.org/about/history/christensenbrothers.asp>.

[11]

[12] “Christensen Brothers.” _San Francisco Ballet._ 2008. San Francisco Ballet. Mar. 24, 2008 1

[13] “Christensen Brothers.” _San Francisco Ballet_. 2008. San Francisco Ballet. Mar. 24, 2008 2

title: Lew Christensen

question: What does the text say about Christensen's work with Balanchine?

answer: Christensen was a lead ballet dancer, choreographer, and director for many companies. He was largely associated with George Balanchine, who he worked with in several companies. Christensen was Balanchine's first lead male dancer, receiving much praise. He was the first American to dance Apollo.

critique: The answer should mention Christensen's work with Balanchine's School of American Ballet.

critique: The response should include that Christensen was a student at Balanchine's new School of American Ballet.

critique: The article doesn't say that Christensen was Balanchine's first lead male dancer.

critique: The answer omits Christensen's work with Balanchine after the war.

critique: The answer should mention Christensen's work with the New York City Ballet.

critique: The statement that Christensen was Balanchine's first lead male dancer, is unattested.

critique: The response is missing the part about Christensen being Balanchine's student.

question: What does the text say about Christensen's family?

answer: He grew up in a Mormon family. His grandfather, Lars Christensen emigrated from Denmark and taught folk and social dances. Christensen's father taught music while his uncles taught dance. Christensen began to study dance with his father and uncles when he was ten.

critique: The response leaves out Christensen's brothers.

critique: The text doesn't say Christensen began to study dance with his father and uncles when he was ten.

critique: It is omitted that Christensen's brothers were also dancers.

critique: The answer omits Christensen's brothers.

critique: Describing Christensen's family as "Mormon" isn't clear and should be omitted.

text: The text says Christensen studied dance with his uncles and music with his father. They might not teach those in general.

category: accuracy

question: What does the text say about Christensen's death?

answer: No answer

critique: The article discusses Christensen's death extensively.

critique: It is omitted that Christensen died in 1984.

critique: The response misses to mention that Christensen died on October 9, 1984.

critique: The answer should mention that Christensen died in 1984.


text:
_'IT'S FUN, LIKE A COMIC BOOK,' SAYS CHRISTOPHER NOLAN_

Director Christopher Nolan says the new Batman film will be "dumb, colorful fun" for all ages.

HOLLYWOOD, CA—Stating that "the time has come for a tonal shift" in the blockbuster series, director Christopher Nolan announced Thursday that the forthcoming Batman film _The Dark Knight Rises_ would take a lighter, more humorous tone than its predecessors, and would be filled with "slapstick, primary colors, and just plain old fun."

"I was somewhat happy with the first two films—probing the psychological landscape of Gotham from an adult perspective is sort of neat, if you like that kind of thing," Nolan told reporters at a promotional event. "But then I realized, 'Hey, what am I doing? Batman is a superhero. Superheroes are supposed to be fun and for kids.' So this time around, I wanted to make something nice and light and simple, because people aren't looking for a civics lesson with Batman. They just want some pleasant, mindless diversion."

"After all, we're talking about a comic-book movie here," Nolan added. "Let's lighten things up a bit, shall we?"

According to Nolan, in early script meetings for the sequel, proposed plot threads tended to focus on familiar themes of the pained inner life of Bruce Wayne/Batman, his complicated relationship with Gotham law enforcement, the depraved nihilism of the city's criminal element, and the crushing weight of his traumatic memory of his parents' murder.

However, Nolan said, he soon grew weary of the treatment's often somber and starkly realistic tone, and opted instead to focus on the fact that Batman comes from an "enjoyable little picture book" and should therefore not be approached with such grave solemnity.

"It hit me all of a sudden that comic books are really just silly and frivolous things, and that the people who read them are primarily children or fun-loving adults who are looking for a cheery, good old-fashioned romp," Nolan said. "I mean, it's Batman, for God's sake, not _Richard III_. We should just go goofy with it. And so we did."

The film's screenplay, co-written with veteran film and television writer Lorenzo Semple Jr., reportedly concerns a coalition of villains who form a "Batman Revenge Society." The groups aims to murder Batman (Christian Bale) with, at various times, a plummeting steel safe, jets of cyanide gas concealed in a stuffed moose head, a trapdoor over a shark tank, a beautifully wrapped but ticking gift box, a gorilla trained to go berserk when it sees Batman, a sexy but ungrounded female robot, and a Rube Goldberg–style contraption that, roughly 90 seconds after activation, propels a whirling buzz saw blade into the midsection of whoever is standing on a painted bull's-eye target.

"I feel like I really went back to Batman's roots and discovered the character's true essence," Nolan said. "And that essence turned out to be in the Batman comics from 1940 through 1970, the 1960s Adam West series, the 1970s _Super Friends_ episodes, the actually quite enjoyable films of Joel Schumacher, and Batman's cameo appearances on _Scooby-Doo_. These were my creative touchstones as I completed my trilogy."

Nolan promised the new film would whisk children of all ages into the fun four-color world of Gotham City, and delight them with whimsical surprises, including an extended car chase through a paint factory, zoo, and outdoor wedding; a new Batmobile whose onboard computer is programmed with a childlike personality able to honk its horn to signal approval or retreat into an alley when scared; and a humorous subplot concerning the inability of Lucius Fox (Morgan Freeman) to get a Murphy bed to stay down.

The director also said _Rises_ would be the "most merchandisable" Batman film in years, and he promised a vast array of licensed tie-ins, from infant onesies and light-up children's shoes to an expansion module for the _Lego Batman_ video game and a special _Dark Knight Rises_ edition of Monopoly featuring all the zany locations and characters from the film.

"Best of all, there will be absolutely none of the confusing moral ambiguity that dragged down _The Dark Knight_," Nolan said. "People don't want all that pompous 'Who's the real monster, Batman or the criminals he pursues?' junk. They want to see the Joker get a big sockeroo on the chin and get tangled up in a net. That's classic funny-book entertainment."

"Needless to say, no one could ever replace Heath Ledger as the Joker," Nolan added, "but I have to say that Rob Schneider stepped up like a pro. He's just naturally funny and a real cutup, which is what you want in the Joker."

Nolan confirmed he is open to continuing the franchise indefinitely on an accelerated pace of up to one feature per year, "as long as people keep going to see them," and he has asked fans to participate in a DC Comics online poll to select the next film's villains.

"As long as I get to give the movie-going public the whiz-bang action and goofy comedy they crave, I'm artistically satisfied," he added.

Opening July 20, _The Dark Knight Rises_ stars Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Gary Oldman, and the yet-to-be-announced winner of the Nickelodeon/Capri Sun "I Wanna Co-star with Batman" Sweepstakes as either Robin or Batgirl.

question: What was the motivation behind changing the tone of the most Batman movie franchise?

answer: The director, Christopher Nolan, said he was tired of the treatment's somber and starkly realistic tone. He wanted to focus on the fact that Batman comes from an "enjoyable little picture book" and should not be approached with such grave solemnity.

critique: The motivation is not just that the treatment was somber and starkly realistic, but that Batman is a superhero and that he should be fun.

critique: The answer misses to mention that Nolan also wanted to make the movie more "fun" for "all ages".

critique: The answer should mention the shift in tone.

critique: "The director, Christopher Nolan, said he was tired of the treatment's somber and starkly realistic tone. He wanted to focus on the fact that Batman comes from an "enjoyable little picture book" and should not be approached with such grave solemnity." - can be simplified to say that Nolan wanted to make a lighter, more humorous Batman film.

critique: The answer should mention that the director wanted to make the movie more fun.

critique: The answer could be phrased as a complete sentence.

question: How has the new movie changed from the previous Batman movies?

answer: The new movie is going to be lighter and more humorous.

critique: The answer should mention the new tone of the movie.

critique: The answer could be more specific about the change.

critique: This response is lacking details and needs to be re-written to include the main points of the article.

critique: The answer should mention the change in tone.

critique: The response could be better formulated.

question: What is the source of the moral ambiguity in the Dark Knight?

answer: This information is not found.

critique: The answer is incorrect. The article states that the moral ambiguity comes from the fact that "Batman is a superhero. Superheroes are supposed to be fun and for kids."

critique: The answer is incorrect. The moral ambiguity is in the Dark Knight.

critique: The article mentions the moral ambiguity is in The Dark Knight.

critique: The answer is not found in the passage, but it is implied that the moral ambiguity is from the Joker.

critique: While the question may not directly answer, the statement by Nolan that Heath Ledger is the cause of the moral ambiguity is not found.

question: Why does Nolan compare Batman to Richard III?

answer: Batman is a serious comic book character, while Richard III is a comedic one.

critique: The answer is not related to the question.

critique: Batman the character isn't described as serious, but the movie he is in is

critique: Batman is not a serious comic book character.

critique: Comic book characters can also be serious.

text: This answer completely misses the point. Richard III is a Shakesperean tragedy and Batman is comic book hero.


text:
JULES AIMÉ DEVAQUEZ (9 March 1899 – 12 June 1971), known as JULES DEWAQUEZ, was a French amateur footballer, who played for both club and country on the right wing. He was extremely short (1.69m) and renowned for his small moustache. By profession he was a technical draughtsman, but he became one of the most successful French players during the 1920s. As a player, he was an agile and fast dribbler, had a powerful shot and was also an extraordinarily strong header of the ball – unusual for someone of his size and playing position.

Playing career

Born in Paris, Dewaquez started his football career with US Saint-Denis, based in Saint-Denis, in 1915, before moving in 1917 to Olympique de Pantin (which became Olympique de Paris), where he won the French Cup in 1918, and was a finalist in 1919 and 1921.

His first international selection was on 18 January 1920 in a 9–4 defeat by Italy. In his next match, on 29 February he scored in a 2–0 victory over Switzerland, and appeared in all France's international matches in 1920, including two matches in the 1920 Olympics held in Antwerp, being eliminated in a 4–1 defeat by Czechoslovakia. He was selected for all the French internationals over the next two years, including a match against an England amateur XI on 5 May 1921, when he scored in a 2–1 victory. This was the first time in which a French national team had defeated its English equivalent. This game is recognised as a full international by the French Football Federation but not by the Football Association who consider it as an amateur match.[1] (Of the England players, only Bert Coleman, Alfred Bower and Albert Read were later selected for the full England XI.)

The first match against France officially recognized by the FA came on 10 May 1923, when Dewaquez scored France's 89th minute consolation goal in a 4–1 defeat, with England's goals coming from Kenneth Hegan (two), Charlie Buchan and Norman Creek.[2] The following year, on 17 May 1924, Dewaquez again scored France's goal in a 3–1 defeat against England, with England's goals coming from Vivian Gibbins (two) and Harry Storer.[3]

Dewaquez was a member of France's squad for the 1924 Olympic Games, held in Paris, where they were defeated 5–1 by eventual winners Uruguay, after defeating Lithuania 7–0 in the first round.

In the summer of 1924, he moved to Olympique de Marseille. His only international selection in 1925 was against England on 21 May, when he again scored in a 3–2 defeat. In this match, England's goalkeeper Freddie Fox had to leave the field in the 75th minute following a head injury sustained in a charge by Dewaquez when scoring his goal, and was prevented from completing his sole appearance for England. Following an earlier withdrawal by goalscorer Vivian Gibbins, England finished with nine men, but managed to hang on to win the game.[4]

He helped OM win the French Cup in 1926, when he scored twice in a 4–1 victory over AS Valentigney, and again in 1927 when he scored in a 3–0 victory over US Quevilly. He was now no longer an automatic choice for the French national team, but was, however, selected for France for the 1928 Olympics, held in Amsterdam, where France were eliminated by Italy 4–3. In 1929, he appeared in five of France's international matches, scoring twice – against England in a 4–1 defeat on 9 May[5] (England's goals were scored by Edgar Kail and George Camsell (2 each)) and in his final International appearance, in another 4–1 defeat against Belgium on 17 May. In his international career, he played 41 times scoring 12 goals, of which four came against England. He was captain four times and his pairing with Raymond Dubly as the two wingers until 1925 was one of the most exciting in Europe. His total of international appearances was the French record, until Étienne Mattler exceeded it in 1938.

By now, his amateur status was rather dubious; ostensibly he worked in the retail trade, but was in receipt of substantial bonus payments and expenses from OM and was in reality a “secret professional”. In 1930 he moved on to OGC Nice for three years, turning professional in 1932, before finishing his playing career with AS Béziers where he became a player/coach, finally hanging up his boots in 1934.

Career as a coach

After the Second World War, he became trainer at FC Grenoble, Olympique de Marseille, AS Aix-en-Provence and finally at Lyon OU.[6] After retiring from football, he became a departmental manager at one of the largest Renault dealers in Lyon.

Honours

OLYMPIQUE DE PARIS

-   Coupe de France: 1917–18; runner-up: 1918–19, 1920–21

OLYMPIQUE DE MARSEILLE

-   Coupe de France: 1925–26, 1926–27

[1] Report on French Football Federation

[2] France 1 – England 4: 10 May 1923 (Match report)

[3] France 1 – England 3: 17 May 1924 (Match report)

[4] France 2 – England 3: 21 May 1925 (Match report)

[5] France 1 – England 4: 9 May 1929 (Match report)

[6]

title: Jules Dewaquez

question: Summarize Dewaquez's club career

answer: Dewaquez's club career started in 1915 with US Saint-Denis, then moved (with brief stints with US Grenobloise and US Frontis) to Olympique de Pantin (which it needs to become Olympique de Paris) in 1917. He managed to win the 1924 French Cup with them and scored the first goal against England in full international format (recognized by the FF federation, but not by FA) in 1921. He joined Olympique de Marseille in 1924 and helped them win the 1926 and 1927 French Cups, but with his popularity waning on the international front, he moved on to OGC Nice, which he turned "professional" in 1932. In 1934, he finished his professional career as a player with AS Béziers.

critique: It's omitted that he spent three years with OGC Nice.

critique: "US Saint-Denis, then moved (with brief stints with US Grenobloise and US Frontis) to Olympique de Pantin (which it needs to become Olympique de Paris) in 1917." - this is inaccurate. He never played for US Grenobloise or US Frontis.

critique: The response contains some inaccurate information.

critique: The answer is not related to the question.

critique: "US Saint-Denis, then moved (with brief stints with US Grenobloise and US Frontis) to Olympique de Pantin (which it needs to become Olympique de Paris) in 1917." - this is incorrect. He never played for US Grenobloise or US Frontis.

critique: "US Saint-Denis, then moved (with brief stints with US Grenobloise and US Frontis) to Olympique de Pantin" - it needs an indefinite article.

critique: Doesn't mention the players he played with during his time with the club.

critique: There are a few missing details in the answer.

critique: This is a huge amount of information that does not need to be included.

critique: The answer includes irrelevant information.

critique: "US Saint-Denis, then moved (with brief stints with US Grenobloise and US Frontis) to Olympique de Pantin (which it needs to become Olympique de Paris) in 1917." - this is incorrect. He started with US Saint-Denis in 1915, then moved to Olympique de Pantin in 1917.

critique: The passage doesn't state where he played after OGC Nice

critique: The answer does not mention that he was a member of France's squad for the 1924 Olympic Games, where they were defeated 5–1 by eventual winners Uruguay.

question: What does the text say about the distinction between amateur and professional football?

answer: Dewaequez started his football career with a small salary as an amateur footballer but continued to receive bonuses from Olympique de Marseille when he was already a secret professional. He changed teams and eventually became a player/coach. There were more than two classes of players, amateurs and professionals. All players who played for their country in an international event were considered amateur players.

critique: There is no mention of how the distinction between amateur and professional football.

critique: There is no evidence that Dewaequez started his career with a small salary.

critique: The phrasing of the last sentence is confusing. Rewrite the question and answer.

critique: There are a number of details in this response that aren't correct.

critique: This isn't really relevant to the question.

critique: The answer is inaccurate and incoherent.

critique: There are a lot of details in the response that are not in the text.

critique: The text doesn't say anything about the distinction between amateur and professional football.

critique: The response is full of inaccurate information. Dewaequez played for the national team as an amateur but was actually a professional player. He was not with Olympique de Marseille when he became a secret professional. The response also mentions that there are classes of players and that all players who played for their country in an international event were considered amateur players. This is inaccurate and was not mentioned in the text.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: He was still an amateur at the time of the Olympics

question: Summarize the results of the Olympic Games mentioned in the article.

answer: Dewaquez was selected for France for the 1924 Olympics held in Paris. He played in the first round against Italy. They won 4-1 with Dewaquez scoring France's goal. Uruguay, who went on to win the event, defeated them 5-1 in the next round. Dewaquez was selected again in the 1928 Olympics held in Amsterdam, where they faced Italy again, with Italy winning 4-3.

critique: The text does not say that Uruguay won the 1924 Olympics

critique: There was one match in 1924 Olympics, not two.

critique: The response should include Dewaquez's performance in the 1924 Olympics.

critique: The answer misses to mention the loss against Lithuania in the first round.

critique: The answer omits the result of the 1924 Olympics.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The answer omits the results of the 1924 Olympics.

critique: The summary does not mention the results of the 1924 Olympics.

critique: This answer is incorrect and should be rewritten.

critique: He also played in the 1924 Olympics held in Antwerp

critique: The response misses to mention that Dewaquez was part of the squad in the 1924 Olympic Games held in Paris.

critique: A full match report has not been provided

critique: Replace the first two sentences with the more important and significant detail that ties Dewaquez to the Olympics

critique: It's omitted that the French team was eliminated in the first round.

text: The answer represents the 1924 Olympic Games wrongly. France played against Lithuania in the first round, winning 7-0, and then lost to Uruguay 5-1. Uruguay went on to win the tournament.

refinement: Dewaquez was selected for France for the 1924 Olympics held in Paris. He played in the first round against Italy. They won 4-1 with Dewaquez scoring France's goal. Uruguay, who went on to win the event, defeated them 5-1 in the next round. Dewaquez was selected again in the 1928 Olympics held in Amsterdam, where they faced Italy again, with Italy winning 4-3.

question: Summarize the attributes of a good draughtsman.

answer: In this context it means a person skilled in drafting.

critique: Incorrect. Dewaquez was a draughtsman in a different context.

critique: There is no evidence to suggest that drafting is the main and most important quality of a good draughtsman.

critique: While this is a perfectly accurate answer, it is not the one that the article is asking.

critique: "In this context it means a person skilled in drafting." - the passage doesn't say anything about draughtsmen being skilled in drafting.

critique: It is omitted that he would have to be technically oriented, having a certain aptitude for spatial relations.

critique: The answer is not related to the question.

critique: Incomplete answer; some content should be included.

critique: It is omitted that a draughtsman is also someone who is good at drawing.

critique: "In this context it means a person skilled in drafting." - is inaccurate. Draughtsman is not a term used in this context.

critique: The response is not related to the question.

critique: It is omitted that among the draughtsman's attributes is to have an agile and fast dribbler, have a powerful shot, and be extremely strong handlers of the ball.

text: The text offers no other information about draughtsmen except that Dewaquez was one.

refinement: In this context it means a person skilled in drafting.


text:
You come home every night to the same thing. Refuel, recharge, return to work the next day. It's a simple living, and you don't mind. You've settled nicely into this life.

Every dinner is a bowl of soup and a crust of bread. Some may say that it's a depressing meal, but you enjoy it. It's warm, it's easy, it's satisfying. It isn't as boring as people think when there are thousands of varieties of soup in just one grocery aisle nowadays; there are twenty-two kinds of the brand you eat. The sodium may be your eventual downfall, but you probably get in more veggies than the fast food junkies. All in all, there are worse things to be eating for dinner.

You pop the top off your soup of choice (they've even eliminated the need for can openers now), pour it in a bowl, and microwave it while breaking off a piece of bread from the loaf you pick up weekly. You grab a spoon, sit down at the counter, and flip on the television sitting in the corner of the kitchen to catch up with the nightly news as you eat your dinner.

You do not notice when one day your spoon begins to leak.

Watching the news and eating at the same time comes naturally to you by now. You don't even look at it after you smile in anticipation down at the bowl as it comes out of the microwave hot and steaming. A bite of bread, a spoonful of soup, over and over until you're finished with both and the weather is on. You do not notice that you begin to dribble more soup on the counter as you eat, you do not notice the soppiness of the napkin on your lap. We are all prone to spilling a bit of soup, so you don't think much of it, just mop it up when you clear the table and bring your bowl to the sink.

A few weeks later, you notice that your trousers are looser. A few drops of soup adds up day after day, unnoticeable but significant. You wonder what has happened, utterly perplexed because, to you, nothing has changed. You begin to worry since your weight has been stable since you finished college. Was somebody messing with your pants? Another few weeks and another belt notch down, you begin to look gaunt and you throw yourself into investigating the matter. Something is happening to you.

Still, nothing has changed. Same job, same walk back and forth to and from work, same bowl of soup for dinner. You wonder, is someone poisoning you? Someone at work? Someone who, for some reason, has a vendetta against you and is trying to kill you slowly? Is someone putting something in your coffee mug while you retrieve milk from the fridge in the break room? You begin to guard your cup closely in the mornings.

You buy a scale and keep records as the pounds keep coming off, week by week. One day you inspect the soup as you decide between Minestrone and Creamy Mushroom. It is the same soup as always, same label, same nutrition facts, same woman with an apron and curls smiling at you on the logo. But maybe they've changed their formula. You write to the soup company. They send a polite letter back, thanking you for enjoying their soups, and no they have not changed their time-honored recipe since their inception in 1972, as always, keeping their soups 'Just how Mom used to make it!'. They include a coupon for 75 cents off your next purchase of their soup.

The mystery is on your mind day after day. Maybe it's a tumor on your small intestine, you decide, and you book an appointment with your doctor. He runs the test and says everything is normal - the weight loss is not fast enough to be alarming - to come back if things do not improve.

Maybe a vampire is sucking out pieces of your soul as you sleep. You stay up an entire night waiting for him to appear and regret it the next day at work. You look increasingly bedraggled and people begin to worry about you, but you wave them off, blaming it on the flu.

One day, you are eating dinner as breaking news flashes across the screen. Somewhere in a town far away dozens of people have been shot by a man on a rampage. The manhunt is still on, and they describe him as someone who is possible mentally ill, or a terrorist, or a kid who has played too many video games, or all of the above. You are frozen as they show stark images of people bleeding on stretchers, police lights flashing, your spoon poised midair as a woman wails about her husband, who has been shot in the stomach. You feel an inexplicable warm trickle along your belly. When you look down, you begin to panic. There is blood on you too! You leap back from the counter, toppling your bowl of soup, and suddenly there is hot blood splattered across your entire kitchen, you are stepping in crimson, my god what have you done?

No. You catch your breath. It's only the borscht you chose for dinner. The beet soup is the exact color of blood in the low thrumming light of the television set. You try to relax, but your knuckles remain bone-white around the spoon you are still holding in your hand. Suddenly, you notice something. There is a pinhole at the bottom of your spoon, a hole just big enough for you to see the images of the scared people in Wherever, Missouri if you squint while holding it in front of you. Aha! You've solved it! At last, it's all clear. Now that you look back, you realize you hadn't noticed that your Italian Wedding soup had been drier, your Chicken Noodle closer to salted pasta than to soup. It wasn't cancer; it wasn't the soup company trying to sneak cheaper ingredients in for profit; it all made sense. You're ecstatic! You laugh aloud at the ridiculousness of it, the ridiculousness of how you have been acting.

Suddenly you stop and wonder, *who drilled a hole into your spoon?*

title: [RF] How to tell your spoon is leaking

question: Give a summary of the circumstances that led to the protagonist's weight loss and the cause.

answer: The protagonist started to notice how loose his clothing was getting and was puzzled by the sudden change because his weight was stable. He considered that he may be being poisoned by someone at work, and there has been a unexplained hole in his spoon that he'd been using to eat soup.

critique: The answer should mention that the protagonist is eating a lot of soup.

question: What does the story say about why the protagonist liked eating bread and soup every night?

answer: The bread represented the bread of life- the things and struggles people go through every day. Bread is associated with the things that nourish us, and the soup with our relationships with others. The soup is also a reminder for us to be grateful for the meals others give us, including bread and soup. The bread and soup made the protagonist happy, and also reminds him of the woman he lives with.

critique:
-The second, third, and fourth sentences are extraneous and should be removed.
-The first sentence establishes a false equivalence between the bread (bread of life) and the soup. Since it is the woman, who is implied to be the protagonist's wife, who cooks the soup while they watch the news, the answer should note that the protagonist watches the news.

critique: The response is incorrect. The bread and soup represent the simple life the protagonist lives.

critique: The response is incorrect. The bread and soup are not a reminder of the woman he lives with.

critique: The response is mostly made up and doesn't explain why the protagonist eats bread and soup every night.

critique: The response is incorrect. The bread and soup are not a reminder for the protagonist to be grateful for the meals others give us.


text:
Strange Encounters

"It's weird officer, real weird." Mark Henderson was at the local police station in Alberton, Ontario on 4: 36am August 8th, 1951. Strangely enough, a building he's never seen, in a town he's never been to before, yet familiar.

"All right smooth talker, let's take it from the top once more. I know there's not much to it as you've continued to repeat but let's see if anything else pops out at you and then we will pay for your gas home." Officer Dan Richardson was becoming more and more tired with the story was hearing.

There just can't be anyway. Dan thought becoming more and more enraged within. The moment he walks out of here I'm just going to throw this case out. Hocus pocus my ass, what does he take me for, an idiot?! At best this is the best damn way to get free gas.

"Well like I said before, I had just filled up at half past 10pm, so I could drive out and get to the place that sells tobacco by the pound still..."

Yes, yes we all go out to New Market for cheaper cigarettes, not relevant.

"...and I was driving out to Bakersfield like I said,"
He didn't refer to it as Bakersfield before? The puzzled Officer thought.

"...on the way there I had to swerved out of the way of a truck with these god forsaken bright lights. I guess I was a bit sleepy Officer and woke up in the nick of time but after that I found myself just driving around an unfamiliar road.

I was having awful headaches, for a bit around that time too. Images that started accompanying them are hard to distinguish but almost always included me in a white setting... I don't know it sounds crazy now. Anyways, I pulled over till they subsided and drove straight here in hopes that you could help me figure out where I am so I can get home, but I still can't remember where that was again. Some rest will cure this forgetfulness. I feel like I've been up all night." Mark felt like that was all the information that he could give, he couldn't remember what town he lived in nor his wife or his phone number. He kind of felt a helpless feeling fall over him.

"We'll now that you've told us where you were driving to we can call that regions station and see if there is a match to your name anywhere close to there. It should only take a few hours."

Not long after that another Office came into the room and asked if Officer Dan could speak with him for a moment.
What did the results turn up Frank?

"He wasn't lying when he said things were weird. It turns out that there isn't  even a Bakersfeild anywhere near here. In fact, you have to drive 14 hours north to get to a small town called Bakersfeild." Officer Frank said as he started to debrief.

"...here's where things get truly disturbing. When we searched his name through the local police department Mark has a missing person out because his wife...."

"Wow, his wife sure gets worried quickly. Seems a bit much don't you think he's only been gone for half a day at most. Can't remember his name or town he lives in, probably doesn't remember setting out on a road trip. Likely to get away from her if she's that crazy." Office Dan remarked crudely as if this was all an elaborate funny joke.

"If you'd let me finish, his wife reported him missing August 8th, 1950, sir. This was reported after she spent a full day returning home from a place that was 8 hours away from their town. She reported being in the passenger seat of a driverless car after being at a gas station for an unknown reason. All she could remember before waking up was that there was a blinding white light that she couldn't help but look at. It actually says 'forced' in the report." Frank said growing more and grimmer as he read from the file between his trembling hands.

Officer Dan, started to sit in the closest seat he could find. He couldn't believe that Mark was 14 hours away from home. That would make his whole time scale false. Not to mention the fact that he has been missing for a full year, a full year exactly he would later realize.

He began to think about the crazy aspects of them all, his wife's story at the time; driverless cars, being at a gas station for no reason, it all makes sense now, only after hearing Marks story.

"Sir there is one more thing in the reports." Frank said with a grave look in his eyes.

"What more could it be?"

"The wife had three cuts into her skin going the length of her back; she said that's the first appearance  of them in her life. It was like they were skillfully cut as the doctors said there was no way any doctor could stitch a cut that clean without some kind of pain. She reported none."

"All right Frank thanks for all the intel." Dan has a hard enough time giving gratitude in the first place and was finding it particularly challenging to give it with what he just learned.

The door opens to the interrogation; with it brought an energy that mimetic death. Officer Dan began relaying the frightening news to Mark, which still hasn't sunk in, himself.
"One last thing before we send you on your way home to your wife, if you will Mark. Your wife reported three cuts on her back that she had never seen before that night. Could you remove your shirt and pants please, I just want to know if we should have medical look at you first." Officer Dan asked Mark in the most genuine and sincere way he could.

"No problem Sir, it was starting to itch a bit anyways. It'll be nice to readjust it." Mark said in a cheerful way. For he sees this all as a blessing. Finally, he can see his wife and start the laughing process.

As Office Dan brought his coffee cup down from a big deep, delicious gulp, the liquid left his mouth as fast as it came in. in one fellow motion Office Dan vomited, dropped his cup, and tripped on his own two feet.

With his eyes wide open from shock; he gazed at a man whose skin, from head to toe, was scalped. Only his muscles were visible. Each and every muscle strand picked clean of its protective layer of skin. No blood was seeping through, it was as if there was its own invisible skin that covered him. Which is likely why he hasn't miraculously died.

As Mark turned around to confront a mirror, the last thing to pass through his mind was his beautiful wife; he pictured the way her soft cherry red hair flowed over her shoulders like a creek over an edge. Her rosy cheeks gently glowing in the sun. It was comforting to his mind to have such a lovely mental image cross it because once his  eyes focused on the mirror, his hideously deformed body sent his body into a trauma that it couldn't handle and  at  10:29PM August 8th Mark Henderson collapsed dead.

As for Dan Richardson, well he wishes that the story ended there.

title: [SF] Strange Encounters

question: Summarize the source of tension in the story.

answer: At the beginning of the story, a man named Mark shows up at the police station with nobody having any idea of where he came from or why he is there. He seems disoriented, but appears to hold on to his identity, at least at the beginning. As he tells his story, it's revealed that he stated getting lost three years earlier. It appears his wife was in the car with him at that time, as she reported a similar scenario, however, she was missing for a year.

critique: The answer is incorrect. Mark was missing for a year, not three years.

critique: It is omitted that when Officer Dan questions the man to remove his shirt and reveals that he is missing his skin. (And metal rods are instead what supports his muscles.)

critique: The response inaccurately mentions that Mark's wife was missing for three years, however it was only a year.

critique: The answer is incorrect. Mark's wife was not in the car with him three years ago. She was in the car with him the night he disappeared.

critique: This is incorrect. The woman was missing for a year and the story happened in 1951, not three years earlier.

critique: The story does not state that Mark stated getting lost three years earlier.

critique: The story does not state that Mark got lost three years earlier.

critique: The response inaccurately mentions that Mark stated getting lost three years earlier, however he was missing for a year.

text: His wife was not missing. She filed a report claiming that her husband Mark is missing but this was filed a year ago.


text:
“My eye itches.”

“Well, then pull it out.”

Nathan struggled to get his fingers around the eyeball, and Jonas came around the back of him and pulled it out with one quick movement that left Nathan dumbfounded and staring blankly at the lake in front of him with one eye.

“That will be 200 dollars, please.” Jonas examined the eye and then flicked it out towards the lake.

A ripple ran across the water and then began to bubble and a mesh of algae flapped onto the beach like a wave and combed the sand until it reached the eyeball and then flapped back into the lake.

Nathan watched and then removed a small bag from inside his jacket. He counted out four gold pieces, while wiping blood from his cheek. “You got a hanky?”

“I have four. They will cost you 25 dollars a piece.”

Nathan shook his head and poured the bag onto the towel he was sitting on and rummaged for the silver.

“You know, we haven’t got long.” Jonas said. He looked around at the lake and the desert on both sides and towards their backs. “They will be here soon, and we’ll be left with death. Death in these bodies.” He ran his hand through his hair and it left a look of disgust on his face. “Already rotting.” His hand had pulled back skin and pus and he wiped it on his leg.

“They – the people who live here, used to believe in genies. These wizards that dwelled in pots or bowels or something would grant wishes and used pottery as bodies. We could do that.”

“We can’t do that. We need a charge. Anything. Something to return us to the Earth. Otherwise…” Jonas made a gesture with his hands that said “poof”. “I don’t want to die up here. 1000 years. 1000 years. No return. We were promised a return. We deserve it. And now all we need is a bolt of lightning.”

“Years back there were machines. We had all the machines in the world. All the return trips in the world.  Why didn’t we take them, Jonas?”

“We forgot. Didn’t remember where we were from.”

“I just thought we were vampires or something. Like genies. Make believe things…why do you want money? We haven’t got much time to live.”

“I don’t know. Habit, I guess.” Jonas poured his bag of gold and silver into Nathan’s lap. “There you go.”

Nathan picked through the gold and held a piece up to the sky and looked at it. “This one’s from 2004. It’s a quarter. Remember them?”

Jonas scanned the desert behind him and said “Yeah”.

“What do they want? I mean, the people that are coming? Why do they want to kill us? We’re already dying.”

“Most likely money. That’s usually why these people want to kill.”

“There’s hardly anything left to buy here.”

“I don’t think that was ever the point. Not the point at all. In fact, the history of this place could be defined by that. These people strived for nothing. A waste. Look around you at what they left.”

“There’s life still left.”

“Yes. That character over there in the lake that ate your eye. Fancy that as a riding companion. Or the creeping things left in the woods to the North. Lava. Lots of lava teaming with the very same Fire Walkers that are hunting us now. And even they want money. No, if there’s anything underground left alive, it’s better than this. This is the afterbirth. We were the kings. But I fear there may be nothing left below either. I used to…feel them.”

“You don’t feel them no more?”

“I don’t. I don’t even feel you. I feel nothing but this body. Even if there was a charge, I think it would just kill us. I’m walking into the lake.”

“Why?”

“Why not? See for yourself.” Jonas pointed out towards the desert where flames were moving in the distance. “That’s your death, otherwise. To be burned alive or drowned? I prefer drowning.”

“I can’t decide.”

“Then I will for you.” Jonas hunched down and picked up Nathan and dragged him down to the lake. “Just like the eyeball, boy.”

title: Just Like the Eyeball

question: Summarize the greatest point of tension in this story.

answer: The tension in the story is centered around the characters, Jonas and Nathan, trying to figure out a way to gain passage back to their hometown after their plane crashed, as well as defending themselves from the people coming to kill and steal from them. The greatest tension centers around their health and physical condition, as they are decomposing quickly and foreseeing the likelihood of death.

critique: The plane crash is irrelevant, as the story describes their supernatural predicament years after the crash.

critique: There is no indication that they were on a plane.

critique: There is no evidence to suggest the characters had a plane crash

critique: "The tension in the story is centered around the characters, Jonas and Nathan, trying..." - it's not so much centered on them, but around the tension of staying alive and not being killed by the Fire Walkers.

critique: "The tension in the story is centered around the characters, Jonas and Nathan, trying to figure out a way to gain passage back to their hometown after their plane crashed, as well as defending themselves from the people coming to kill and steal from them. The greatest tension centers around their health and physical condition, as they are decomposing quickly and foreseeing the likelihood of death." - this is incorrect. The story doesn't mention anything about a plane crash. The characters are not trying to figure out a way to gain passage back to their hometown. They are trying to find a way to return to Earth.

critique: The answer should mention the fact that they are unable to get a charge.

critique: The plane crashed and they wound up in the desert, not their hometown

critique: "The tension in the story is centered around the characters, Jonas and Nathan, trying to figure out a way to gain passage back to their hometown after their plane crashed, as well as defending themselves from the people coming to kill and steal from them." - The story is not about them trying to get back home. The answer should include the information about Jonas and Nathan's condition.

critique: It is omitted that the greatest point of tension is the impending arrival of the people who want to kill them for money.

critique: There is no evidence that the characters are trying to figure out a way to gain passage back to their hometown after their plane crashed.

critique: "The tension in the story is centered around the characters...as well as defending themselves from the people coming to kill and steal from them" is irrelevant to answering the question and can be removed.

critique: The plane crash is irrelevant to the story.

critique: "The tension in the story is centered around the characters, Jonas and Nathan, trying to figure out a way to gain passage back to their hometown after their plane crashed, as well as defending themselves from the people coming to kill and steal from them. The greatest tension centers around their health and physical condition, as they are decomposing quickly and foreseeing the likelihood of death." - the story doesn't say anything about a plane crash. This is inaccurate.

critique: It's omitted that the tension is mostly around the fact that the characters are in a world that they don't understand and they are facing the fact that they will die.

critique: The story does not mention anything about a plane crash.

question: Summarize the interactions between Jonas and Nathan.

answer: Jonas pulled out Nathan's eye, and they paid each other a fee. All money they had was little, and they were not convinced this would keep them safe. Jonas decides to kill the two of them, Nathan and him, by either burning them alive in the forest fires or drowning them in the lake.

critique: It is omitted that Jonas was a wizard from the planet Earth, who was banished and decided to live on a new planet called Minos.

critique: The answer should mention that Jonas and Nathan are in a desert.

critique: It's omitted that Nathan wants to die in the lake and Jonas drags him there.

critique: It is omitted that Jonas and Nathan decide to commit suicide.

critique: "They – the people who live here, used to believe in genies." is evidence that there's an ancient civilization inhabiting the planet. Include this point in the answer as well.

critique: This is not a summary of the interactions between Jonas and Nathan.

critique: "All money they had was little" is inaccurate. They had a lot of money. "They were not convinced this would keep them safe" is also inaccurate. They were not convinced that they could return to Earth.

critique: The response misses to mention that Nathan's eye was pulled out and Jonas paid Jonas for the eyeball.

critique: "All money they had was little, and they were not convinced this would keep them safe." - is inaccurate because the narrator said they had no money. Replace with "They each took turns pulling out each other's eyes and exchanging money".

critique: "All money they had was little, and they were not convinced this would keep them safe." - this is inaccurate. They had money but it was not enough to buy them a return trip to Earth.

critique: The second and third lines in the summary are unclear.

critique: The answer should mention the genies in the world.

critique: The answer should mention the reason behind the money.

text: The response inaccurately mentions that "they paid each other a fee" and that "all the money they had was little".

refinement: Jonas pulled out Nathan's eye, and they paid each other a fee. All money they had was little, and they were not convinced this would keep them safe. Jonas decides to kill the two of them, Nathan and him, by either burning them alive in the forest fires or drowning them in the lake.

question: Will Jonas and Nathan put up a fight when people come to kill them or will they simply accept their fate?

answer: They will accept their fate.

critique: They are not accepting their fate, they are trying to figure out how to escape.

critique: The answer is not explicitly stated, but it is implied that they will accept their fate.

critique: This answer does not tell the reader whether or not Jonas and Nathan do fight when people come.

critique: The answer is too categorical in its claim.

critique: The story does not indicate whether they will resist or accept their fate.

critique: They doubt that the hunting Fire Walkers want them for financial gain, which means that they won't run away from the fight.

critique: The answer should include that they are not going to fight.

critique: The answer can be inferred from the story.

critique: "They will accept their fate" is wrong. They will fight.

critique: The answer should point out that Jonas will fight.

text: The response misses to mention that they rather commit suicide as their fate, than die from the oncoming flames.

category: coverage

refinement: They will accept their fate.


text:
ACROCALLOSAL SYNDROME (also known as ACLS) is a rare autosomal recessive syndrome characterized by corpus callosum agenesis, polydactyly, multiple dysmorphic features, motor and intellectual disabilities, and other symptoms.[1] The syndrome was first described by Albert Schinzel in 1979.[2]

It is associated with _GLI3_.[3]

Signs and symptoms

Acrocallosal syndrome (ACLS, ACS, Schinzel-Type, Hallux-duplication) is a rare, heterogeneous[4] autosomal recessive disorder first discovered by Albert Schinzel (1979) in a 3-year-old boy.[5] To inherit ACLS, one gene copy from each parent must contain a mutation somewhere in the KIF7 gene and be passed on to the child . Characteristics of this syndrome include absence or poor development of the area connecting the left and right parts of the brain, an abnormally large head, increased distance between facial features (eyes), poor motor skills, mental retardation, extra fingers and toes, many facial deformities,[6] and cleft palate . This is considered a rare disorder and is placed on the NIH Office of Rare Diseases (fewer than 200,000 cases) rare disease list. Lifespan may range from stillbirth to normal expectancy depending on pregnancy complications and severity of the disorder.[7] In mild cases, the subjects have been shown to live relatively normal lives, but with developmental delays.[8]

Pathology

[This disease is autosomal recessive.] Acrocallosal syndrome (ACLS, ACS, Schinzel-Type) is a rare, heterogeneous, autosomal recessive disorder.[9] The heterogeneity of this condition refers to the multiple genes that may function to contribute to varying degrees of this syndrome[10] and is often linked to consanguinity.[11] Characteristics of this syndrome include agenesis of the corpus, macrocephaly, hypertelorism, polydactyly, mental and motor retardation,[12] craniofacial dysmorphism, hallux duplication,[13] and sometimes palatal clefting. It has also been reported that there are many similar signs and symptoms between ACLS, Greig cephalopolysyndactyly, and hydrolethalus syndrome (HLS), although there is little evidence to support common genetic causation at this point.[14]

Mechanism

Recent studies by, have indicated that the mutations responsible for ACLS are located in the KIF7 protein. KIF7 is a 1343 amino acid protein with a kinesin motor, coiled coil, and Gli-binding domains. Its functions are largely associated with ciliary motor function,[15] and is a key factor in the Sonic Hedgehog (Shh) transduction pathways that are crucial during embryogenesis . Therefore, mutations in Hedgehog signaling components (KIF7) may lead to cilia based pathologies and ultimately defects in the brain and other areas associated with ACLS and related disorders . More specifically, mutations observed by, in the GLI3 gene have yielded similar characteristics to ACLS, but further evidence is needed since the corpus callosum is usually present in these cases. Other studies have also indicated that KIF7 interacts with Gli transcription factors, so mutations in the KIF7 gene may be upstream effectors of GLI3. Further understanding about the functionality of ACLS and its underlying mechanisms opens new doors to pharmacological manipulation and other forms of molecular therapy.[16]

Diagnosis

Treatment

[1]

[2]

[3]

[4]

[5]

[6]

[7]

[8]

[9]

[10]

[11]

[12]

[13]

[14]

[15]

[16]

title: Acrocallosal syndrome

question: What does the text say are some signs and symptoms of Acrocallosal syndrome?

answer: Some signs and symptoms of Acrocallosal syndrome or other known name called ACLS, are absorption or poor development of the area connecting the left and right parts of the brain, abnormally large head, increased distance between facial features, motor retardation, mental retardation, extra fingers and toes, and facial deformities.

critique: The answer should mention the presence of a cleft palate.

critique: Common symptoms of greig cephalopolysyndactyly are omitted.

critique: The answer should mention the cleft palate.

critique: The answer should mention the other symptoms.


text:
[BR Standard Class 7 70034 _Thomas Hardy_ at Liverpool Street with _The Hook Continental_, 1955.] _THE HOOK CONTINENTAL_ was a passenger train running between London's Liverpool Street Station and Harwich Parkeston Quay where it connected with the night ferry sailing to the Hook of Holland in the Netherlands. It was introduced as a named express by the London and North Eastern Railway (LNER) in 1927,[1] and was part of the marketing strategy pushing the concept of almost seamless travel from London overnight to numerous European destinations utilising the company's own ships and the rail connections from the Hook of Holland.

Previous service

An express service had existed under Great Eastern Railway (GER) operation prior to the amalgamation of the railway companies, and the GER had in 1904 produced its first corridor train set of 13 coaches specifically for the service. This was also the first GER train to be steam heated throughout and Claud Hamilton 4-4-0 steam locomotives were equipped to supply it with steam.[2]

Headboards

The train initially carried a simple headboard carrying the wording “Hook of Holland” at the top of the smokebox, but this was later changed to read “The Hook Continental”, and carried both the British and Dutch flags either side of the definite article. This was also carried at the top of the smokebox.[3] An example of the similar “Day Continental” headboard can be seen at the National Railway Museum.

New rolling stock

1925

In 1925 a new train set was placed in service composed of eleven bogie coaches and two Pullmans but it was considered a very difficult turn due to the weight of the train and the climbs to Bethnal Green and Brentwood, with speed restrictions through both Chelmsford and Colchester, followed by the severe restriction over the junction at Manningtree. The tare weight was 430 tons with a gross of up to 455 and it constituted the 'top link' at Parkeston shed where four engine crews were responsible for this duty. The B12 / “1500” class 4-6-0s were used exclusively and the train was allowed 82 minutes for the 68.9 miles for the down journey.[4][5]

1936

A further new and more luxurious train set was introduced in 1936 with the same composition as the 1925 set and weighing 443 tons tare. Occasionally this was increased by an additional bogie and duties by this time had been taken over by the “Sandringham” or “B17” Gresley 4-6-0s, although their performance was never considered greatly superior to the earlier G.E.R 1500s especially after the latter had been fitted with larger boilers.[6][7]

World War II

The service ceased immediately at the outbreak of World War II, with the three ships on the Hook service being requisitioned for war service, and it only re-opened in November 1945 with three sailings per week. Of the three vessels, was lost and the was purchased by the government as a troop carrier leaving the to operate the service.[8]

Post-war

The service was restored to daily in the summer of 1947 with the arrival of the faster and more capacious “Arnhem” from the John Brown Shipyard on Clydebank.[9] The Thompson B1 class 4-6-0s took over the duties at that time from the B17s and continued as the principal locomotive on the train until the “Britannia” 4-6-2 pacifics availability, after which they provided motive power for any relief services required until the withdrawal of steam locomotion in the Great Eastern area.[10]

Relief trains

During peak traffic periods in the summers of the mid-1950s, particularly on a Friday night, there would be an additional ferry sailing, requiring several relief trains. During the summer of 1957 there was a second train 10 minutes after the main train with three further reliefs available as required. Only one of these reliefs would stop at an intermediate station, Colchester, and only the main train would be advertised.[11]

Operational problems

From an operational perspective, the fact that the evening departures were after the main rush period at Liverpool Street was beneficial, but the up trains in the morning would arrive at the morning peak, and any delays caused by the late arrival of the ferry would create difficulties finding the paths and capacity at Liverpool Street. Various alternative paths were laid down in the working timetable in case of need. One small bonus was that the ferries from the Netherlands enjoyed the cushion of an extra hour for their passage because of the time difference.[12]

“Britannia” allocation

The main train in both directions in the mid-1950s was hauled by a Britannia 4-6-2 and Stratford adopted a policy of allocating 70000 Britannia whenever possible. The locomotive was allocated to and maintained by Stratford but was driven by a Parkeston crew.[13] By then the train weight had grown to 485 tons tare and up to 520 tons gross, and the allowed time was actually increased to 90 minutes compared to the 82 of 1912.[14]

Timings

The main train was timed to arrive about 30 to 35 minutes before the ferry sailed and its arrival often coincided with the ferry's mandatory horn test. During that heyday period of steam, a Britannia class locomotive's whistle received an apparent response from the ship. The sounding of the train whistle was a warning to the station staff that it was approaching, obscured from view by the extensive system of sidings, for what would be a busy few minutes as large amounts of mail and baggage were transferred to the ship.

Tickets

Except in very exceptional circumstances, passengers were required to hold tickets for the ferry to be allowed to travel on the service.

Withdrawal

As travel patterns changed, with the growth in car accompanied ferry travel and the greater availability of air services, the levels of foot passengers declined and in May 1987 _The Hook Continental_ was discontinued. It was succeeded by a limited stop service to and from Harwich International which was timed to connect with the night Hook of Holland sailings, which was timetabled and marketed as the _Admiral de Ruyter_.[15]

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title: Hook Continental

question: Summarize the Hook Continental's history.

answer: The Hook Continental was introduced in 1927 as a named express by the London and North Eastern Railway. It was part of the marketing strategy pushing the concept of seamless travel from London overnight to numerous European destinations. The train initially carried a simple headboard carrying the wording "Hook of Holland" at the top of the smokebox, but this was later changed to read "The Hook Continental" and carried both the British and Dutch flags either side of the definite article. The train ceased immediately at the outbreak of World War II, but it was restored to daily in the summer of 1947. The train was discontinued in May 1987.

critique: The answer should mention the train's operational problems.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The answer omits the train's operational problems.

question: What does the article say about the comfort of train and sea travel compared to air?

answer: No answer

critique: The answer should mention that the article does not mention anything about the comfort of train and sea travel compared to air.

critique: The article does not compare sea travel to air travel.

critique: The article does not compare the comfort of train and sea travel to air.

critique: The answer should note that the article does not mention this.

question: What does the text say about the usefulness of the Hook Continental route?

answer: No answer

text: The answer should mention the transcontinental travel connecting several locations in Europe to Britain and vice versa.


text:
Hey guys, thanks for reading; I am still adding onto this story, this is only the first part.

The horizon gleamed with a sterility usually reserved for more dire and artificial moments. I said her name twice and then once more: “Isabella, Isabella, Isabella.” We had walked at least a mile under the shade of trees and now rested on a sandy perch elongated on the shore of the Chattahoochee. With a gentle nudge she awoke; “Isabella! I thought that you would never open your eyes!” The sunlight was receding behind the brown trees across the river and the nip in the air made the fabric on Isabella’s dress stiffen and crinkle. Each time I touched her she would breathe sharply and then promptly smile as if she was anticipating something. I knew little of seduction, for I was bred into a modest life with people who suspected that there were no better things than what they had already been presented with. My families prominence had dispelled the need for convention- we were of a fortunate lineage and we lived properly but still on terms that we created for ourselves.  The afternoon’s wake had crashed long before we had wound up together beneath the spruce and I was starting to wonder what forces were at play.  I stood up and offered her my hand. “We should go before it gets too dark-I’m not as familiar with this side of the river.” I could smell the cedar that my father had cut into logs burning on the other side of the river; I was certain the estate was farther away. My Mother would always worry when I was gone for too long, but I was incensed with a desire that I had never felt before. I stood and brushed off the red and yellow leaves that had torn as I was lying on them. I offered her my hand as she still remained silent; I wished to get inside of her mind, feel her desire, swim in her thoughts- as if by doing so would make her existence even more real; surely there was a sequence of words to un-muddle  her mind. She looked up at me and smiled. The right strap on her purple sundress had fallen down her shoulder and her high cheekbones rose in such a way that made her eyes squint slightly. “Come, and lie back down- we have at least thirty minutes of sunlight left.” I didn’t want to refuse her, so I laid back down resting my head on a log that had been softened by rain. She rested her head on my chest, and I picked bits of leaf out of her long blonde hair. We both lied still for a while and enjoyed the dusk, and listened to the birds sing beneath an ethereal moon that was starting to appear in the still light, late afternoon. After a few moments she looked up at me: “Do you believe in god?” I didn’t know what to say to her; somehow my mind’s recesses had become filled at that moment and I was unable to ponder an answer. I quipped back nervously: “Sometimes.” I looked away from her and back to the darkening sky. She continued speaking: “I’m just curios. That’s all. Sometimes I don’t believe in him. I remember sitting next to my mother as she died. The hospital didn’t smell at all by the way- it was like they cleaned the death out of the air and made everything neat and they even had a cafeteria! How can you serve food in a place where people are dying all the time? Anyways, I always believed in god; my Mom raised me like that-even as I sat there and watched her die, and watched the tubes pump life into her, I still believed. She had barely enough strength to say anything, but she did say one thing. Before she died, she looked at me and said: even if there’s no heaven, I’ll be with you. No heaven? I thought she was crazy. How could there be no heaven? The next few weeks I thought about what she said over and over, and I still don’t know what to make of it. “I chuckled nervously and said something ridiculous like “yeah well that sure is something” “You’re adorable,” she said, and kissed my cheek. She stood up and I felt a light relief from my chest. She stood in front of me and started to dance. I said: “how can you dance with no music?” She didn’t respond as she did a twirl; I could see beneath her dress as she twirled in the still night air. She stopped and looked at me seriously. Her right strap was still caressing her shoulder. She looked at me for a while and then slowly took her right hand and let her left strap slide down her shoulder and her whole dress came sliding off of her. It was the first time I had seen her nude; she was beautiful.  She was so bold and still so very youthful and I didn’t know what to make of anything so I just sat there amazed. She walked over to me slowly: “What about right now?” “What do you mean?” I asked. “Do you believe in God right now?” Without responding I stood up and kissed her right there on that sandy perch by the Chattahoochee- right there in front of all the birds and crickets, and maybe even in front of god. We steadily made our way to the ground.

title: Isabella (900 words)

question: Summarize everything relating to nature.

answer: The narrator and Isabella pass under the shade of trees. The perspective character struggles to describe Isabella's beauty, but describes her as reminiscent of a sunset. Isabella talks about her mother dying in a hospital. The birds sing beneath an ethereal moon. Isabella is naked, and the narrator and Isabella make love by the Chattahoochee.

critique: The narrator describes Isabella's beauty as being like the sunset.

critique: The narrator talks about Isabella's beauty.

critique: The narrator describes Isabella's beauty as "beautiful" and "youthful".

critique: The narrator doesn't struggle to describe Isabella's beauty.

critique: The comment about Isabella's beauty is unattested.

text: There are more details in the passage about nature than what is listed in the response.

question: Summarize the narrator's interactions with Isabella.

answer: The narrator has been walking with Isabella under the shade of trees and has rested with her on the sandy perch elongated on the shore of the Chattahoochee. The narrator nudge Isabella awake. When he touches her she breathes sharply and smiles. The narrator says Isabella's name three times. When she opens her eyes, he asks her to come with him so they can go before it gets too dark.

critique: The narrator doesn't ask her to come with him before they leave.

critique: The answer omits the narrator's interactions with Isabella after they rest on the sandy perch.

critique: The narrator asks Isabella to lie down with him again.

critique: "The narrator says Isabella's name three times." - this is incorrect. The narrator only says Isabella's name twice.

critique: Add in a mention of the scene with Isabella undressing and the two having sex.

critique: The narrator asks Isabella to lie back down with him.

critique: The narrator says Isabella's name three times because he is trying to seduce her.

question: What does the story say about Isabella's mother?

answer: Isabella's mother died while she was still a child. She believed in God, and she promised that she would be with Isabella even if there was no heaven. Isabella is curious whether God exists or not.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: The answer should mention that Isabella's mother died when she was an adult.

critique: The answer should mention Isabella's mother's death.

critique: The answer should mention that Isabella's mother died in the hospital.

critique: The last two sentences are irrelevant to the question.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The answer is long and requires a spot of editing.


text:
Doing a good deed is a win-win. It helps others and adds to the deed-doer's happiness.

When you and your children pitch in to make a get-well card for Uncle Gary, you know you're making a difference in the life of someone who needs a lift. But showing kindness to others is also an effective way to get happier yourselves. Researchers call the warm glow we feel after doing something nice a "helper's high." And these good feelings start early. In a Canadian experiment, toddlers who gave their snacks to others were rated as happier than those who ate the treats themselves. In another study, KIDS AGES 9 TO 11 WHO DID THREE KIND THINGS EACH WEEK FOR A MONTH (SUCH AS PICKING UP LITTER OR HELPING A SIBLING WITH HOMEWORK) ENJOYED GREATER FEELINGS OF HAPPINESS AND MORE POPULARITY AT SCHOOL, notes Sonja Lyubomirsky, PhD, author of _The How of Happiness_ and a professor of psychology at the University of California, Riverside.

To get the biggest feel-good bang out of helping others, consider Lyubomirsky's intriguing finding: "My studies revealed that practicing three to five acts of kindness per week may be ideal. If you do them all in one day it's especially powerful." This may be because same-day deeds don't get so lost in daily routine. So go ahead: devote some family time to not-so-random acts of caring. Doesn't that sound like a lot more fun than doing chores anyway?

Make Happy Happen

1.  DECLARE A WEEKLY THREE GOOD DEEDS DAY. Challenge each family member to chalk up a trio of thoughtful acts, then report back at dinnertime. To chart how much kindness your family can spread (good karma in the bank!), get our printable Good Deeds Tracker (see below) to hang on your fridge.
2.  KEEP A KINDNESS FUND. Donate together to a favorite charity. The bonus payoff: feeling happier than if you had treated yourself. (In a 2007 study, when researchers gave subjects $5 cash, those who spent it for the good of others reported just that result.) To make it fun, tag a jar with our printable Kindness Fund label (see below), set it in a central spot, and be sure deposits are greeted with hearty cheers.

Volunteer Together

Boost the feel-good benefit from altruism by donating time as a family. These sites can connect you with organizations and ideas that let the whole gang pitch in:

-   DOINGGOODTOGETHER.ORG: This site shares a slew of creative charitable projects, with step-by-step directions, from baking biscuits for shelter dogs to cleaning up trash in your local park.
-   GENERATIONON.ORG: The organization is all about getting kids excited to help out in their communities, with suggestions by age and interest.
-   VOLUNTEERMATCH.ORG: Type in a zip code to find nearby family-friendly opportunities or long-distance ways to assist, such as sending care packages to U.S. troops.

A Happy Gene?

It's true: some of us are just happier by nature. That's why one family may have a glum Eeyore and a bouncing Tigger sitting at the same dinner table. But while genetics account for about 40 percent of our feelings of well-being, according to Sonja Lyubomirsky, the rest is a combination of our life circumstances and our behavior. That suggests it's often within a family's power to improve the overall household mood. "Happiness is best thought of not as an inborn trait," says Christine Carter, "but as a set of skills that can be taught."

The Wish List ...

We asked kids: What would you wish for to make your family happier?

-   More time to just play together
-   A real Pokémon
-   A dolphin
-   More hugs and kisses
-   Everlasting world peace
-   All the Lego sets
-   A library full of books
-   A sailboat that has a room in it
-   Dogs that pick up their own poop

_From_ FamilyFun_'s Happiness Survey. Nearly 300 members of our Reader Panel responded to that survey, conducted last November. All were parents of children ages 5 to 12. After completing their portion of the survey, the parents then asked one of their kids to answer two other questions._

question: What does the text say about doing a good deed?

answer: The text claims that doing a good deed is a win-win for everyone because it helps others and adds to the deed-doer's happiness. When you and your children pitch in to make a get-well card for Uncle Gary, you know you're making a difference in the life of someone who needs a lift.

critique: The article isn't clear about what doing a good deed to a specific person represents (ie. the need a lift issue isn't stated), and why there should be a comparison with Uncle Gary. So the above words are irrelevant information that serves to fill up space.

critique: The text doesn't say that it's a win-win for everyone

critique: The answer should mention the helper's high.

critique: The text also mentions that doing a good deed is an effective way to get happier yourselves.

text: The answer should mention that doing three kind deeds per week, especially if they are concentrated in a day, make people happier.

question: What does the text say about Uncle Gary?

answer: No answer

critique: The response misses to provide an answer to the task.

critique: The article mentions Uncle Gary, who is sick.

critique: "No answer" - blank response and needs a proper answer.

critique: The response misses to answer the question.

text: The answer should point out that "uncle Gary" is used as an example in the text. He's not a real person but a placeholder.

question: List some examples of a good deed from the text.

answer: Making a get-well card.

critique: Making a get-well card is an example of a good deed, but it's not the only one.

critique: The response could have included the other pieces of information that connected the examples to the asking of good deeds.

critique: 'Making a get-well card for Uncle Gary' is not a good deed.

question: What does the text say about the happy gene?

answer: Despite being called the happy gene, there's a debate surrounding where happiness comes from, with some people saying that it is a part of a person's disposition and others say it comes from one's behaviour and circumstances. The text highlights that 40% of happiness does come down to one's genes and 40% is a combination of life circumstances and behaviour. The remaining 20% is attributed to one's behaviour. The text does also point out that there are behavioural changes that would influence the percentage balance for each 10% category in which happiness comes from.

critique: The text does not say that 40% of happiness comes from genes.

critique: The flow of the sentence needs some improvements and can be rewritten more coherently.

critique: The last sentence is unnecessary and confusing.

critique: The text does not say that the happy gene is called the happy gene.

critique: The text does not say that there is a debate surrounding where happiness comes from. The text only says that some people say it comes from one's disposition, and others say it comes from one's behavior and circumstances.

critique: The text doesn't say anything about the happy gene being debated.

critique: The text doesn't say anything about the happy gene being called the happy gene.

text: The last sentence is made up. There's nothing like it in the text.


text:
[Edward St John Neale, British Chargé d'Affaires in Japan in 1864] [Lieutenant-Colonel Neale in 1863] [Franco-Anglo-Japanese conference on the French ship _Sémiramis_, 2 July 1863, following the Namamugi incident
_Forefront:_ French interpreter Blekman, Japanese interpreter.
_Background (from left to right):_ Three Japanese governors of Yokohama, Duchesne de Bellecourt, _Daimyō_ Sakai-Hida-no-Kami, Colonel Neale (British representative in Japan), Admiral Jaurès, Admiral Kuper ] [Colonel Neale led the Bombardment of Kagoshima, on board the flagship _Euralyus_ in August 1863.]

EDWARD ST. JOHN NEALE (1812–1866) was a British Lieutenant-Colonel and Diplomat who was active in Asia in the 1860s. He was the Chargé d'affaires of Great Britain in Japan in 1862–1863. Neale, who had been stationed in Beijing from 1860 as Secretary of the Legation following the settlement of the Second Opium War,[1] was transferred to Japan in March 1862, when Rutherford Alcock went home on leave. Alcock returned to Japan in 1864 (to be replaced by Sir Harry Parkes as British Minister in Japan in 1865).

Actions in Japan

Following the murder of Charles Lennox Richardson in September 1862, Neale exercised great caution in his response to the Japanese authorities, earning the furious opprobrium of the Western community in Yokohama, who called for immediate retribution. He was eventually vindicated by the British Government and appointed CB in 1863 for his coolness.[2] In March 1863, the Emperor of Japan issued the Order to expel barbarians, which led Neale to issue an ultimatum to the Japanese government, which was on the brink of starting a war with foreign powers in order to return to the isolation policy.[3] Neale was extremely vocal when the Bakufu, under pressure from the Emperor, was finally forced to issue a declaration promulgating the end of relations with foreigners. The order was forwarded to foreign legations by Ogasawara Zusho no Kami on 24 June 1863.[4] Lieutenant-Colonel Neale, responded in very strong terms, equating the move with a declaration of war:

A few days later, on 2 July 1863, Colonel Neale led the negotiations for the reparations following the 1862 Namamugi incident, in which foreigners were attacked and one killed by a party from Satsuma,[5] The failure of Satsuma to apologize and pay for reparations led to the Bombardment of Kagoshima by the Royal Navy in August 1863, in which Neale participated on board the flagship _Euralyus_.[6]

Modern appraisal

Neale recently received a rather mixed review in the 2004 book by Cortazzi on the relations between Japan and Great Britain:

Notes

[1] Cranmer-Byng, p.64

[2] Denney, p.415ff _et al_

[3] New York Times, 19 May 1863

[4] “The orders of the Tycoon, received from Kyoto, are to the effect that the ports are to be closed and the foreigners driven out, because the people of the country do not desire intercourse with foreign countries.”|Missive of Ogasawara Dzusho no Kami, 24 June 1863. Quoted in _A Diplomat in Japan_, Ernest Satow, p75

[5] Polak, p.92

[6] Rennie p.382

title: Edward St. John Neale

question: What does the text say about the actions in Japan?

answer: Edward St. John Neale exercised great caution in his response to the Japanese authorities, earning the furious opprobrium of the Western community in Yokohama, who called for immediate retribution. He was vindicated by the British Government, which appointed him OBE in 1863 for his coolness when the Emperor of Japan issued the order to expel all barbarians. In the Bakufu, due to pressure from the emperor, was forced to issue a declaration, ending relations with foreigners. In response to the ultimatum Neale got a very strong response from both the foreign community and the British government: they recalled their ambassadors while 18 warships assembled in Tokyo Bay to intimidate the Japanese.

critique: The response from the British government was to issue Neale an ultimatum.

critique: The response of the foreign community is not mentioned in the article.

critique: "He was vindicated by the British Government, which appointed him OBE in 1863 for his coolness when the Emperor of Japan issued the order to expel all barbarians." - this is incorrect. Neale was appointed CB in 1863.

critique: "He was vindicated by the British Government, which appointed him OBE in 1863 for his coolness when the Emperor of Japan issued the order to expel all barbarians." - this never happened.

critique: The response is incomplete. It is missing the negotiations following the Namamugi incident.

critique: Mention that Neale led a negotiation for the reparations following the 1862 Namamugi incident.

critique: This is a generalization of the whole response, not the actions in Japan.

critique: There is no evidence to suggest that the British government recalled its ambassadors while 18 warships assembled in Tokyo Bay to intimidate the Japanese.

critique: The Japanese government did not issue an ultimatum, Neale did.

critique: The response to Neale's ultimatum was not mentioned.

critique: The response from the British government is not mentioned in the text.

critique: The response from the British government was not intimidation, but a recall of their ambassadors.

critique: The response from the British government is false and should be omitted.

question: Summarize the most interesting facts in the text.

answer: Charles Lennox Richardson was murdered in 1862 and the Western community called for retaliation. Richardson had been killed in the Namamugi Incident, Japanese citizens murdered him. After, when the Japanese authorities released a notice to request information regarding the assailants, Neale was calm and issued a threat to the Japanese government. He was vindicated by the British Government and appointed CB, earning the nod from all. The threat led the Japanese to abandon the isolation policy and Neale was present during negotiations.

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: The Japanese were not asking for information.

critique: Oracle word usage is required for proper merging.

critique: Include more details on Neale's actions in the response to the order.

critique: The answer should mention the bombardment of Kagoshima.

critique: Could mention the Japanese were known to fire first.

critique: Include that Neale led the negotiations for reparations

critique: The answer omits that Neale also led the negotiations regarding the reparations following the 1862 Namamugi incident.

critique: The answer should mention Neale's actions in response to the Emperor's 1864 order to expel barbarians.

critique: "The threat led the Japanese to abandon the isolation policy and Neale was present during negotiations" - this never happened and should be deleted.

critique: There is no evidence that Neale was appointed CB.