text:
        There was an elevator man who stood all day long, every day.
His feet did not hurt. He didn't know if he liked his job, or if he hated it. Either way, it didn't change things. The morning had been slower than usual. The motel he worked at was wedged between two abandoned apartment buildings. It was one of those skanky little places where the rooms were unkempt and cheap, and so usually in the morning he was taking people down instead of up. Mostly they were people that had come there drunk with a loving stranger. Most of them woke up in the morning not knowing where life had led them the previous night, and were as frantic as hell to get out of there. And so he met a lot of run-down people, in the morning. A lot of half-naked people. A lot of confused, hung-over, and ashamed people, and they told him to take it down. This morning was slow. He stood. The light was gentle and the air was cold. The lights flickered, always, to a set rhythm, and he had become accustomed to it. He had composed little melodies inside of its tempo in his sleep. It was sort of a one-two-three-one-two-three dance, but not exactly in time. Like slow dancing with a corpse. He was inside of his thoughts, dancing.
	There was a shifting mechanical noise and the doors slid open. He was currently on the 9th floor, as he had been for most of the morning. A man quickly walked inside and pressed, “lobby”. The button lit up. The elevator man looked slightly offended. “That’s my job.”,
“What?”
“That’s my job, sir.”
“Shut the hell up!”
The man looked frantically around the confined universe of the elevator, his eyes were sunken in, he wore a disheveled blueish dress shirt. It was un-tucked in most places. Unbuttoned. His tie hung undone around his neck.
They descended to the 4th floor and there was a sudden slight jolt of gravity, they stopped. “Oh Fucking Christ!..”
The doors did not open.
They stayed for a long time on the 4th floor.
“You sure this thing’s working, pal?”, the disheveled man stammered and spoke unevenly.
“I don’t know”, said the elevator man, “That’s not my job.”
They stayed for a longer time.

         The lights flickered in shaky time.
The elevator man was in his head again, waltzing clumsily with a beautiful manikin. A deceased but manipulatable elegance. He danced for a long time.
The disheveled man cussed and cussed. He took out a cigarette, lit a match.
“No smoking.”
The disheveled man paused, looked up, lit match in hand.
“Look.”, He said. “Friend.”
He threw his cigarette aimlessly and slammed himself against the unopened doors.
“God damn you! Fix this fucking thing! I can’t stay here I need to get out!”
He started to cry.
“It’s not my fucking fault, you know. She was always giving me signals. She was a whore! God damn whores! I just woke up and she’s dead. That’s right buddy you get the breaking news while it’s hot. Straight from the horses mouth, I don’t god damn care. They’re gonna take me to jail.”
He slammed his fists into the door.

           The elevator man stopped waltzing. He pressed “lobby” The elevator started again.
The man was uncontrollably sobbing, sinking to the floor.
“Take me to jail! Go ahead god damn everything and my stinking fucking luck! I’m going to hell.”
They reached the lobby.
The doors opened and the man did not get up.
A few seconds passed.
The elevator man kept the door from closing.
“Sir, we have arrived at the lobby floor.”, he said calm and bored.
“Go to hell! Call the god damn police!”
The disheveled man was rolling slowly on the floor.
“That’s not my job.”

title: Straight From The Horse's Mouth.

question: Why does the man in the elevator think that he will go to jail?

answer: The man in the elevator killed a woman and disposed of the body.

critique: The man in the elevator did not kill a woman and dispose of the body.

text: It's not said in the text that the man disposed of the body. This should be omitted.

question: What type of people frequent the hotel where the elevator man works?

answer: The elevator man is used to people who are drunk and disorderly, who are partially clothed, who are disoriented.

question: How does the elevator man keep his mind occupied?

answer: He composes melodies in his head, dancing with a beautiful manikin.

critique: The elevator man is dancing with a corpse, not a manikin.

critique: The answer should mention that the manikin is deceased.

critique: The answer could be clearer in its pronoun use.

critique: It is unclear here that this dancing is something he does to keep his mind occupied-presumably because the man is having a mental breakdown and does not appear to interact with his environment. Omit the final sentence-it is not a summary of how he occupies himself, only how he further neglects to do his job.

critique: The answer should mention that the elevator man is in his head.

text: The answer should note that the elevator man is dancing with the mannequin in his head.


split: train

text:
_THE UNDERDOG_ (1999) is the first novel by Australian young adult fiction writer Markus Zusak. Along with _Fighting Ruben Wolfe_ and _When Dogs Cry_, _The Underdog_ was published in the United States in 2011 as part of the anthology _Underdogs_.[1]

Plot

_The Underdog_ is about Cameron Wolfe, a 15-year-old boy and a down-and-out character, his family, and a girl he falls for. Cameron struggles with his identity, questions his morality, and tries to overcome feelings of inadequacy. Cameron shares a room with his older brother, Ruben, who is always coming up with petty criminal activities he never follows through with, such as robbing a dentist only to be distracted by the beautiful nurse working there. His sister, Sarah, is always “going at it” with her boyfriend, Bruce. His brother, Steve, is successful and thinks he is above the rest of his family. His mother works hard all week and still manages to complete motherly duties, and his father is a plumber. Cameron starts working for his father on weekends, where he meets Rebecca Conlon, a girl who he thinks is perfect. The culminating event of the novel is Sarah and Bruce's break-up. Her emotional reactions engages and unites all of the family. Cameron is particularly affected by the fallout and questions his own treatment of women. As the break-up is unfolding Cameron is also asked to help his former best friend, Greg, with some money issues. Greg gets entangled in a drug buying fiasco and Cameron must lend him the money to get him out. Much of the emotional landscape of the novel is established through Cameron's vivid dream sequences, which allow the reader a glimpse into his deeper feelings. The story is about boys' dirty habits, family sticking together and being an underdog.

Characters

-   CAMERON WOLFE: A 15-year-old boy, he is the protagonist and first person narrator of the novel.
-   RUBEN WOLFE: Cameron's adventurous and slightly rebellious older brother.
-   STEVE WOLFE: The oldest of the Wolfe brother's. He has a successful career and looks down upon the silliness of his younger brothers.
-   SARAH WOLFE: Cameron's older sister. She begins the novel in a serious relationship with Bruce. Their relationship consists of kissing on the Wolfe family's couch. Much of the novels plot revolves around the story of her relationship.
-   MOM: Cameron's mom, famous for cooking mushrooms every night.
-   DAD: Cameron's dad. He works as a plumber and hires Cameron to work with him on Saturdays.
-   GREG FIENNI: Cameron's former best friend.
-   BRUCE PATTERSON: Sarah's boyfriend.
-   REBECCA CONLON: Cameron's crush. He meets her while helping his father work on the plumbing at her house.

Reception

In a review of _Underdogs_, _Los Angeles Times_ reviewer Susan Carpenter notes Zusak's earlier works “share many of the same stylistic hallmarks and themes of belonging and survival” with his better-known novels including the Michael L. Printz Award-winning _The Book Thief_.[2] _The Age_ commented that Zusak's writing style was “relaxed and confident” and did not "try to explore social issues.[3]

[1]

[2]

[3] “Cameron Wolfe, lost and found”, _The Age_, 14 May 2003. (accessed 15 November 2012)

title: The Underdog (novel)

question: What does the text say about how to become a successful fiction writer?

answer: No answer

critique: No answer is given, but the text does mention that Zusak's earlier works share many of the same stylistic hallmarks and themes of belonging and survival with his better-known novels.

critique: The article does not directly say anything about success in the field. It is implied by Zusak's own experience that financial success happens if the work is enjoyed.

critique: The answer is incorrect, and should be re-phrased to mention that the question is not answered.

critique: The response misses to mention that the passage is not found.

text: No explicit answer is given, but it is implied that the stylistic hallmarks and themes of belonging and survival, that appear in Zusak's better-known novels, are part of the reason for his success as a fiction writer.

category: coverage

refinement: No answer

question: What does the text say about The Underdog?

answer: The Underdog by Australian young adult fiction writer Markus Zusak is the author's first novel. It is about Cameron Wolfe, a 15-year-old boy, who falls in love with a girl and strives with his morality and emotions of inadequacy. The book is about boys' dirty habits, family sticking together and an underdog.

critique: The answer should include when the book was published.

critique: The answer should mention the plot of the book.

critique: The answer should mention that the book was published in the United States in 2011.

critique: It is omitted that the book was published in the United States in 2011 as part of the anthology Underdogs.

critique: "boys' dirty habits" is not mentioned in the text.

critique: The answer should include the novel's plot.

critique: 'TRUE' is misspelled. This should be corrected.

critique: There are two inaccuracies in this response, "Struggle with his morality" and "She falls for". The text uses a male character to describe this book, and the only girl to fall in love is Cameron. (She falls in love with Cameron, who struggles with his morality and emotions of inadequacy).

critique: The answer does not elucidate the plot that well.

critique: It is omitted that the book was published in 2011 as part of the anthology Underdogs.

critique: The book is about boys' dirty habits and family sticking together, not about being an underdog.

text: The answer could explain the plot more clearly and with more depth, namely that Cameron struggles with navigating relationships with his complicated family, his crush on a girl is called into question with his sister's breakup, and he become involves with his former best friend's money issue.

refinement: The Underdog by Australian young adult fiction writer Markus Zusak is the author's first novel. It is about Cameron Wolfe, a 15-year-old boy, who falls in love with a girl and strives with his morality and emotions of inadequacy. The book is about boys' dirty habits, family sticking together and an underdog.

question: What does the text say about Cameron Wolfe?

answer: Cameron Wolfe is the protagonist of the story, he is 15 years old and the first-person narrator. He has an older brother Ruben, and a family that includes his mother and father, Steve. Cameron's family is poor and enjoys playing practical jokes. Cameron goes to work for his father on Saturdays where he meets Rebecca Conlon.

critique: Doesn't mention Cameron's dream sequences.

critique: Item 6 is not in the text, but it is a reasonable inference based on the previous items in the text.

critique: There is no evidence that Cameron's family plays practical jokes.

critique: Cameron's family's financial situation is not mentioned.

critique: "a family that includes his mother and father, Steve" is irrelevant.

critique: The family's poverty is not mentioned in the text.

critique: " his family plays practical jokes" - this is inaccurate. The evidence suggest their brother is the family miscreant.

critique: It is not mentioned that Cameron's family enjoys playing practical jokes.

critique: The text does not say that Cameron's family enjoys playing practical jokes.

critique: It's omitted that Cameron struggles with his identity, questions his morality, and tries to overcome feelings of inadequacy.

critique: Cameron's family is not mentioned to play practical jokes.

critique: Omit the information about Cameron's family, as the passage does not provide it.

question: What does the text say about Cameron's family?

answer: Cameron has a sizable family consisting of his parents, his siblings, Steve, Sarah, Bruce, and Greg. Each of the siblings have their own separate story. Cameron's father works as a plumber, and Cameron's mother is a model on birthdays and mother's day, while Cameron's siblings seem to have a devil-may-care attitude. The sisters in particular, Sarah and Cameron, share a room together and break up at the end of the novel. Sarah has a serious boyfriend, Bruce that she shares a room with. However, when they eventually break up, Sarah and Bruce's emotional reactions engages and unites the entire family. It especially impacts Cameron, who questions his own treatment of women.

critique: This is not an accurate description of the family.

critique: There is no evidence that Cameron's mother is a model on birthdays and mother's day or that Cameron's siblings have a devil-may-care attitude.

critique: The narrator doesn't know they share a room together.

critique: The story doesn't mention Cameron's mother modeling on birthdays, or Cameron's sister breaking up with her boyfriend at the end of the story.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The answer should mention Cameron's mother.

critique: 'It especially impacts Cameron, who questions his own treatment of women.' does not reflect the story, but I think this line can be rewritten to be in accord with the story.

critique: It's omitted that Cameron's father is a plumber.

critique: The response contains a lot of non-relevant information that should be omitted.

critique:
- the answer includes information that is not referenced in the text.

- the phrasing of sentences is also confusing.

critique: "The sisters in particular, Sarah and Cameron, share a room together and break up at the end of the novel. Sarah has a serious boyfriend, Bruce that she shares a room with. However, when they eventually break up, Sarah and Bruce's emotional reactions engages and unites the entire family. It especially impacts Cameron, who questions his own treatment of women." - this is not true. Sarah's break-up with Bruce does not involve Cameron. The passage only mentions Cameron's budding crush on Rebecca.

critique: Rephrase the response to include Cameron's mother

critique: The response contains inaccurate information.

critique: The answer is too verbose. It should be reduced to just the most important details.

critique:
-The response gives a little too much detail about the family, focusing on minor characters. The fact that Cameron's father works as a plumber and that Cameron's mother is a model on birthdays and mother's day could be better avoided.
-Sarah and Cameron do not share a room together. Cameron lives in a room with his brother Ruben. If a room is being referred to, it is Sarah's.
-The comment about Cameron's siblings share a devil-may-care attitude is irrelevant.
-The model on birthdays and mother's day is irrelevant.


text:
The moon was still out in the blue-black sky when I woke up. A kerosene stove hissed gently nearby. Drops of last night’s rain had frozen on my sleeping bag and cracked softly as I withdrew.  My fingers thawed on a bowl of half-blackened soup that tasted like coal and burnt plastic. Then we left, and my headlamp blew out mercury bubbles of light against the ash and cobalt sky.

I was already scraping my feet against rock and climbing up towards the tree line by the time the orange ribbons cut the sky. I watched the day rise slowly up from behind the white-tipped mountains. It was giving me something I could look back on and say I had lived. The morning, with dawn and its sharp spikes of numbing cool, and my eyes, and the whole wide world: they were all so strong just then. The cold made me burn hotter and faster and better and it made my breath curl into  vanishing clouds. My feet were ready to etch the memory of me onto this mountain.

The last green thing was a calm lake at the foot of a white and rocky mountain. It was the last innocent thing before the peak. We left a few things and then continued on. The trail we had followed disappeared into scree and so we followed the stream up. We stopped where the incline leveled out into a rocky bowl and filled a bottle with cold stream water. We treated it with a few drops of yellow, finger-staining iodine. I saw the small and brave flowers, yellow and pink, that sprouted timidly on the rocky ground around the river.

We hiked up through snow to the sharp ridge of the bowl. All around was an algae that turned the snow crimson when stepped on. I looked back on my footprints and saw they were scarlet. I felt as if I were walking on a thin film that had been cast to disguise a sea of blood. The soles of my shoes soon became blood red and so did my pants. We all looked like murderers.

 The next thing that lay between the peak and us was a narrow strip of snow that marked the end of the bowl and the beginning of the peak. On one side the snow sloped sharply down into the bowl. On the other was nothing except air and then distant trees and rock and ice-blue lakes far below. We stayed towards the bowl side because the side of the ridge facing the drop was likely hollowed out by the wind and melting snow. Even then, I felt as though the snow beneath me would collapse and I would be swept out into the air.

The peak was somewhere up a tower of jumbled-up rock. There was a path that led up and we followed it. The jumble narrowed in one spot and the path led to a ledge at the very edge of the rock jumble and there was a drop that would kill me if I fell. I had to cling to the rock with my feet in a six-inch-wide shelf and shuffle carefully along. I looked up as I was nearly to the end and there was a spider an inch from my hand. I do not know if it was deadly. It might have been. If I had been afraid of spiders, I would have let go in fright. The jagged rocks below me would have broken me apart.

The peak came quickly after that. There was not much room, but I could sit on a rock and open the metal ammunition canister with the register in it, and sign my name and the date, and write some bad poetry next to it. But I did write something true there. I wrote I am above, on a line by itself, and that rang true. I was strung up so that all the craftwork of the earth could be seen. Cold wind blew around me and I had left my warm clothes at the lake below, but it meant nothing more to me than any of the cold winds I remembered. It was as though I had already lived through it a long time ago.

The view had the clarity that comes after a rain, with the whites and greens and cold greys of the country before me both softened and sharpened at once, and the mountains and valleys fading to pale blue as they approached the pastel clouds over the horizon. I was sitting on the jagged throne of the universe, and all that was before me was mine now, mine and no one else's, because I was the only person alive, had only ever been the only person alive, and that feeling did not make me feel lonely or frightened, but instead young and filled with life that would never fade or dissipate but stay collected until the electric reservoir in my veins finally ran dry. But that day would be a long time coming.

title: "The mountain after the rain"

question: Is the narrator a human or a robot?

answer: That cannot be determined from the passage.

critique: This response is not necessary. The narrator seems to be human.

critique: It is implied that the narrator is human.

critique: It is inferred that the narrator is a human.

critique: The descriptions in the passage are too vivid for it to be a robot.

critique: Robots do not have veins, and they can't die.

critique: The answer is wrong. The answer can be determined from the passage.

critique: The narrator is human, but the answer could be better expressed.

critique: One could gather, if the question isn't answered, that the narrator might be a robot.

critique: "That cannot be determined from the passage." - is a bit too broad. The answer to this question can be found in the story.


text:
[Jollywise]

What can we expect from the kids’ entertainment space in 2017?

The new year is well and truly upon us, and every other tech blog ready to impart their digital predictions for 2017 if they haven’t already. Whilst generally you can expect a lot of the same old – ‘this will be the year for VR’, etc. – we wanted to examine some of the things that we expect to see more specifically in the kids’ entertainment space this year.

Augmented and virtual reality

The underlying issues of accessibility and refinement prevented VR from slipping comfortably into the mainstream in 2016, while the Pokémon Go craze of the summer teased AR potential. While we might not have seen the ‘year for VR’ that we had hoped for, what we did see was a string of brands getting involved with VR just to say they’re in the VR game – regardless of whether they actually have something valuable to offer to the space. Ideally, this year we’ll see more companies offering valuable uses of the technology, rather than the ‘VR for VR’s sake’ that is born out of the fear of being left behind.

Furthermore, we’re hoping to see more defined areas for the use of virtual and augmented reality, be it gaming, education, or even live events – and we’re especially interested in how this will come to fruition in kids’ entertainment and education. However, while developers of VR work towards a tech-accessible, cost-friendly product, it’s likely that we’ll be looking more closely at AR for the time being. The challenge, we suspect, will be creating AR that outlives the initial gimmick, which means content is more important than ever.

There are a few great examples of recent children’s AR that we’d love to see more of. TILT Textiles weave their technology with animated stories in their Enchanted Duvet and Jungle Rug to create an interactive storytelling experience for youngsters, while Curiscope’s Virtuali-Tee (which got a mention in our post on augmented reality last year) is a strong example of the ways in which augmented reality might be integrated into the classroom as a tool for learning.

Web TV

As early as 2010 we’ve seen reports surfacing to indicate the shift from cable/satellite television to online show providers. Over the past few years in particular, web based TV has gained a lot of traction, but this area has been largely dominated by Netflix and Amazon Video, whose online exclusive shows (think Netflix’s recent A Series of Unfortunate Events and Amazon’s The Grand Tour) are able to pull more and more people into subscriptions. Newer or more niche services (Mubi, Twitch, Animax, Hulu) tend to be overshadowed by the bigger names and app versions of existing TV channels.

We’re excited to see what this shift could mean for kids’ TV this year, especially with the recent prototype demonstration of Disney’s own TV product at CES 2017. With tablet sales in decline, we could be looking at a resurgence of television that favours web-based, ‘watch anytime’ content. An expansion of the children’s web TV space is on the horizon.

We’re also anticipating further crossover between television and gaming in 2017. SVOD (Subscription Video On Demand) platforms like Azoomee, Sky, and Hopster currently operate as two separate services: a classic TV service, and then gaming. We’re hoping to see the lines between these two services begin to blur, as more crossover content is created. Interactivity is especially appealing to kids. So there’s no reason this can’t be geared towards younger viewers.

Live Video

As Facebook continued its attempt to undercut YouTube’s dominance in the video space, live video was everywhere in 2016. We’re seeing many kids turning away from traditional television and towards their favourite YouTube stars – the interactivity of the platform means that the viewing experience is more personal, intimate, and therefore valuable.

Web TV is allowing kids to watch what they want to, exactly when and where they want to watch it, but the appeal of the interactivity of YouTube has encouraged a flood of online video creators to start aiming their content at younger audiences. Live videos build on this to create a more ‘immediate’ interactive experience, so kids are especially engaged when consuming content from their favourite YouTubers (MirandaSings is a great example) this way.

As our Facebook and YouTube subscription feeds become more and more infiltrated with live video content, we’re anticipating an emergence of live video in the kids’ entertainment space – and we’re especially interested to see which broadcaster will be the first to truly capitalise on this demand.

AI and chat bots

While we blogged about the rise of the internet bot last year, we’re excited to see how this space will be refined in 2017, and how (if at all) the chatbot will find and secure its space in kids’ entertainment and education.

We saw the beginnings of this exploration in 2016; Unilever, for example, have used a chatbot campaign on Facebook Messenger called ‘Little Brush, Big Brush’ to create an interactive storytelling platform that encourages children to look after their teeth. Then there’s Oyoty, a bot app described as a ‘personal safety assistant’, that’s designed to connect with children’s social accounts, detect potential problems, and help them learn to stay safe online.

The trick, however, will be finding the line between being helpful/educational, and not stepping on parents’ toes.

OUR CEO JON MASON also indicates that we could see an increase in the use of bots outside of the sales and service bots that were everywhere in 2016. We’re looking, he suggests, towards,

  “Bots as entertainment, branching narratives, and stories – low cost ways of providing immersive brand extensions for entertainment companies”.

We’re ready to see interactive children’s storytelling secure a place in the chatbot game.

Fitness and educational tech

Despite the apparent need for “quality research and evidence” to support the claims of the negative impact of “increasingly screen-based lifestyles”, the media continues to be hot to report on the negative physical effects of children’s preoccupation with digital entertainment. To combat the negative association between digital entertainment and childhood obesity, we’ve seen toy companies invest in technical toys that incorporate gamification to encourage tech savvy children to take part in physical activity.

Fisher Price’s Think & Learn Cycle, for example, attempts to entice three to six years olds to exercise whilst playing screen-based games. It’s essentially a children’s exercise bike in disguise, that maintains the brand’s educational focus. This is just one example of how toy companies are shifting focus from toys that function purely as entertainment, to technical toys that provide longer-term value in the form of fitter and smarter kids. These attractive benefits could result in a surge in the production and popularity of fitness based toys this year – even the AR Jungle Rug that we mentioned encourages physical activity in the form of yoga.

We’ll also be seeing kids’ entertainment pay more attention to the development of emotional intelligence. Our upcoming game for The Next Step, for example, focuses on relationships; the player must figure out the best way to communicate with a variety of personalities to successfully navigate the story. We’re interested to see what other projects surface this year in kids’ entertainment to perpetuate values of empathy and good communication.

Overall?

In 2016 we saw a lot of digital trends extensively explored, but very few refined. This year, we’re hoping to see these trends consolidate, establishing their relevance and overall suitability to a young demographic.

OUR GAME FOR THE NEXT STEP, “TAKE IT TO THE TOP” IS NOW AVAILABLE TO PLAY HERE.

[]

Posted January 16th 2017

Steph Rathbone

Steph is Jollywise's Content Executive and resident bookworm.

question: What does the text say about VR's inability to slip into the mainstream on 2016?

answer: VR has underlying issues of accessibility and refinement. The author of the text mentions that VR might not have been the year for VR that many people hoped for.

critique: The answer should mention that VR has been around for a while, and 2016 was not the year for it.

critique: The answer could be more specific about VR's accessibility and refinement.

text: In the second sentence, replace the first "VR" with "2016"

category: coherence

question: What does the text say about growth in live video?

answer: The text shows that there was an increase in the use of live video in 2016. This was due to the increased popularity of subscription services like Netflix and Amazon. The popularity of services like Netflix and Amazon have also reduced the need for live TV.

critique: The answer should mention the popularity of live video on social media.

critique: The answer should mention the popularity of YouTube.

critique: The response is missing the part about the rise of live video on Facebook and Youtube.

critique: The answer should mention that the popularity of live video is due to the interactivity of the platform.

text: Subscription services like Netflix and Amazon are not relevant to the question.

question: What does the text say about Facebook?

answer: Facebook has become a dominant force in online streaming. The company has been undercutting Youtube with their own live videos. In 2016, Facebook was flooded with live videos. The company is anticipating an emergence of live video in the kids entertainment space.

critique: The second sentence is irrelevant and should be removed.

critique: The answer should mention the live video trend.

critique: "The company is anticipating an emergence of live video in the kids entertainment space." - extraneous information that should be deleted.

text: The answer could also mention Unilever's interactive Facebook campaign.

question: What does the text say about smartphones?

answer: Smartphones have become an important part of kids' entertainment in 2016. Some kids' content is available only on these devices and more kids' TV services are moving towards web-based content. There are several apps being developed to target kids. Developers are also looking into better ways to use AR and VR.

critique: The usage of the devices by kids isn't evidenced.

critique: The answer should mention the decline in tablet sales.

critique: The answer is too long and should be rewritten.

critique: The answer mentions content being available only on smartphones, which is incorrect.

critique: The answer is a bit too long and includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The last sentence is extraneous and irrelevant.


text:
When you were nine, your mother shot you in the chest.

At school, they called you Voodoo Boy, but as your dad, I couldn’t see the wood for the trees. I see it now. Clear as sheets of gelatine. And the way you sculpted me... well, it makes the analogy all the more appropriate I suppose.
When you fell and tore your knees, you didn’t cry like other kids. You were transfixed by the leaky, tasty goo that came out; running down your shins, and coating your fingertips. Dabbling and savouring and swallowing the copper liquid, with a grin on your face and a flutter in your concrete heart.

Your teachers would write notes in your workbook. Not pleasant ‘Well done Nicholas’es as I would’ve wanted, but ‘See me’s and red detention slips. All the time. Stabbing with pencils, painting curses on walls. You held a girl down, and stapled her tongue to her lip, Nick.

We took you out of school after that.
And your mother, she looked at you in shame, disgust. Loathing. She couldn’t understand – and this is a direct quote – why you were so fucking evil. I couldn’t bring myself to hate you. I made you, and I wanted to make your life liveable. That was my duty.

The strangest things would fascinate you; ordinarily exciting things were dashed with mundane and just discarded, like they weren’t worth the effort. You liked eyes. You drew them. You touched them and pushed them inwards to see how long it took for your vision to fog over. Once, your mother stopped you from popping it back into your skull. We need to be clear on this; it wasn’t because she didn’t want it to happen. She almost certainly did. She simply couldn’t stomach it. And when yours weren’t interesting anymore, the growing brown tedium of your irises, you looked to experiment elsewhere.
Not on me, mine were brown too. What you told me after pressing your own was that you wanted to see inside. You asked me what was there, and I said I didn’t know. Blood or something probably.

It was around eight o’clock, sometime in November. Your mother had fallen asleep on the sofa, and you were drawing, cutting and sticking. You heard her snore; ‘Mean Old Mum’, and you felt like an experiment. Mother’s pearly blues.
You tried to see inside her eyes. I think you believed me about the contents, but you were very much about finding things out for yourself, for certain.
Her eyes were loosely closed. The one on the left, the top eyelid. You snipped it right up the middle to get a closer look at the cornea, the iris, the pupil. White fluid, red fluid, and screaming, cursing, flailing mother. She said that we had to disown you, that you were a fucked up child. I couldn’t leave you, and she left me after that. I still loved her and trusted her, and she still popped by from time to time – to cry, to talk – but she never acknowledged you again.
One day, she came by, drunk. Very drunk. All slurred words and vocal gesticulations. She had a service revolver, her Dad’s I think.

When you were nine, your mother shot you in the chest.
When you were nine, your mother shot herself in the head, upwards, through the roof of her mouth.

She collapsed backwards, into the table by the front door – the one we kept the keys on, and the post – an assortment of thumping noises, and gurgling noises trickling from the hole in her head.

I loved you Nick. And for all your faults, I still love you. But I’m done now. Everyone gives me the look. The one that says ‘like Father like son’. And I don’t want to be thought of like that. I’m a good man. I have a good heart. But they’ve gone to waste.

I guess I’m trying to say that I hope all this has changed you, and I’ll see you soon.

Love you Nick,
Dad.

title: Voodoo Boy

question: Summarize the evil deeds Nicholas commits.

answer: Nicholas' teachers remarks are quite disturbing. His tendencies to be fascinated by some of the strangest things and his violent sides tend to make them feel frustrated.

critique: The answer should mention the specific evil deeds Nicholas commits.

critique: The response misses to mention that Nicholas staples a girl's tongue to her lip.

critique: The answer omits the narrator's son's evil deeds.

critique: The answer should mention the specific things Nicholas does.

critique: While his relation to his dad and his mother's abandonment is important, it has nothing to do with what he's notable for. That should be omitted.

critique: "Nicholas' teachers remarks are quite disturbing. His tendencies to be fascinated by some of the strangest things and his violent sides tend to make them feel frustrated." - this is incorrect. Nicholas' teachers wrote notes in his workbook and gave him detention slips. He held a girl down and stapled her tongue to her lip.

question: Summarize the narrator's feelings towards Nick.

answer: The narrator loves Nick, but he is also frustrated with Nick's behavior. He is frustrated because Nick is a bad influence on him and he is sick of people thinking he is like Nick.

critique: It would be clearer to state that the narrator is the father, Nick's father.

critique: The narrator does not seem to be frustrated with Nick's behavior.

critique: The narrator is not frustrated with Nick's behavior. He is frustrated with the way people see him because of Nick.

critique: The narrator is not frustrated with Nick's behavior.

critique: There is no evidence that the narrator is frustrated because Nick is a bad influence on him.

question: What does the story say about Nick's behavior as an adult?

answer: No answer

critique: The response is incorrect. There is an answer in the text.

critique: The response misses to mention that Nick's father hopes that all his bad behavior has changed him and he will see him soon.

critique: The answer should mention Nick's murder.

critique: The story doesn't say anything about Nick's behavior as an adult.

critique: The story does not mention Nick's behavior as an adult.


text:
_44 LIQUORMART, INC. V. RHODE ISLAND_, 517 U.S. 484 (1996), was a United States Supreme Court case in which the Court held that a complete ban on the advertising of alcohol prices was unconstitutional under the First Amendment, and that the Twenty-first Amendment, empowering the states to regulate alcohol, did not lessen other constitutional restraints of state power.

Background

In 1956, the Rhode Island Legislature passed two regulations restricting the content of alcohol advertisements. The first prevented both in and out-of-state manufacturers, wholesalers, and shippers from “advertising in any manner whatsoever” the price of any alcoholic beverage offered for sale in Rhode Island. The second prevented Rhode Island news media from “mak[ing] reference to the price of any alcoholic beverages” under any circumstances.[1]

In 1985, a liquormart brought a suit against the liquor control commissioner, arguing, among other things, that the first regulation, which prevented the liquormart from advertising its prices, was unconstitutional. The Rhode Island Supreme Court, however, held that the regulation did not violate the First Amendment, the Commerce Clause, the Equal Protection Clause, or the Sherman Anti-Trust Act.[2]

In the same year, the Rhode Island Liquor Stores Association filed a suit that attempted to enjoin a local Rhode Island newspaper, _The Call_, from advertising prices of liquor outside of the state. In that case, the Rhode Island Supreme Court held that the second regulation was constitutional, and enjoined the newspaper from advertising out-of-state liquor prices.[3]

In _44 Liquormart_, the company 44 Liquormart Inc. owned liquor stores in Rhode Island. The other petitioner, Peoples Super Liquor Stores, Inc., operated several liquor stores in Massachusetts, which Rhode Islanders used. The complaint original began, because 44 Liquormart attempted to run an advertisement, which the Supreme Court of the United States described as:

Because the advertisement _implied_ that 44 Liquormart had low prices, the Rhode Island Liquor Control Administrator fined the store $400.00. After being assessed the fine, the petitioners brought the suit, alleging that the regulation was unconstitutional. The District Court found the regulation banning advertisements unconstitutional, because the state did not prove that the law directly advanced its interest in reducing alcohol consumption, and because the law's reach was unnecessarily extensive.[4]

The First Circuit Court of Appeals reversed the lower court, ruling that an increase in alcohol advertisements would lead to an increase in alcohol sales and that the Twenty-first Amendment gave Rhode Island's ban a presumption of validity.[5]

Opinion of the Court

Justice Stevens, writing for the plurality, reversed the First Circuit Court of Appeals. He stated first that it was a mistake to assume that commercial speech was not entitled to protection under the First Amendment.[6] Relying heavily on the Court's decisions in _Bigelow v. Virginia_ and _Virginia Bd. of Pharmacy v. Virginia Citizens Consumer Council, Inc._, Stevens concluded that the Court's “early cases uniformly struck down several broadly based bans on truthful, nonmisleading commercial speech, each of which served ends unrelated to consumer protection.”.[7] He nonetheless noted, however, that the Court has at the same time recognized that states may regulate commercial advertising to a greater degree than non-commercial advertising.[8]

While Stevens essentially reaffirmed the principle that states have a wider latitude to regulate commercial speech, he stated that Rhode Island had gone too far. Specifically, he stated that the Court has, in the past, been wary of the “dangers” of outright content-based bans on commercial speech. He further stated:

Having described the regulation as a “paternal” one, which assumes that the public will respond badly to the truth, the Stevens court then went on to address Rhode Island's argument that it had “substantial interest” in promoting temperance. Stevens, however, did not give much weight to this argument, because the state provided no findings of fact showing that the ban actually did promote temperance.[9]

Stevens further rejected Rhode Island's argument that because the facts supporting or opposing a conclusion that the total ban did, in fact, promote temperance could “go both ways,” the First Circuit Court of Appeals was correct in deferring to the legislature. In rejecting the state's argument, Stevens called into question the Supreme Court's ruling in _Posadas de Puerto Rico Associates v. Tourism Company of Puerto Rico_, which was extremely deferential to the legislature.[10]

Finally, Stevens quickly rejected Rhode Island's contention that the Twenty-first Amendment gave the state the power to enforce the complete advertising ban. He conceded that the Amendment did give the state's greater ability to regulate alcohol without violating the dormant commerce clause, but that it did not "license the States to ignore their obligations under other provisions of the Constitution.”[11]

Concurrences

Stevens wrote for the majority as to Parts I, II, VII, and VIII. The major holdings from these sections were that the Twenty-first Amendment did not “save” Rhode Island's total ban from unconstitutionality and the result that the ban was unconstitutional.

Stevens, in Parts III and V, which were joined by Justice Ginsburg and Justice Kennedy, and Justice Souter, stated that the First Amendment allowed for greater regulation of commercial advertising than non-commercial advertising.

Stevens, in Part IV, which was joined by Justice Kennedy and Justice Ginsburg, concluded that not all commercial advertising is as protected as other types of commercial advertising.

Stevens, in Part VI, which was joined by Justice Kennedy, Justice Ginsburg, and Justice Thomas, rejected the Court's reasoning in _Posadas_.

[1] .

[2] _S & S Liquor Mart, Inc. v. Pastore_, 497 A.2d 729 (1985).

[3] _Rhode Island Liquor Stores Ass'n v. Evening Call Pub. Co._, 497 A.2d 331 (1985).

[4]

[5]

[6] _44 Liquormart, Inc._, 517 U.S. at 496.

[7] _44 Liquormart, Inc._, 517 U.S. at 497-98

[8]

[9] _44 Liquormart, Inc._, 517 U.S. at 505

[10] _44 Liquormart, Inc._, 517 U.S. at 509.

[11] _44 Liquormart, Inc._, 517 U.S. at 516.

title: 44 Liquormart, Inc. v. Rhode Island

question: What caused the United States Supreme Court to change its mind with regards to the restriction of alcohol advertisements?

answer: The Supreme Court changed its mind because it found that the ban was unconstitutional.

critique: The answer is too vague. It should be more specific about the reasons for the change of mind.


text:
MARIO DE JESÚS URIBE ESCOBAR (born 1949) is a Colombian politician and lawyer. Uribe-Escobar graduated in Law from the Autonomous University of Medellín and the University of Antioquia.[1][2]

Political career

He began his political career as councilman of his hometown; the municipality of Andes, Department of Antioquia. Between 1982 and 1986 served as deputy of the Department Assembly of Antioquia and then to the Chamber of Representatives of Colombia in representation of Antioquia, serving from 1986 to 1994, in which he was Vice President of the Chamber between 1990 and 1991 and worked as member and president of the Investigations and Accusations Commission. In 1994 Uribe-Escobar was elected to the Senate of Colombia and served until October 2007.[3][4] Uribe-Escobar quit the Senate after receiving a notification from the Attorney General of Colombia calling him to testify on regards to the Parapolitics scandal. He was President of the Senate of Colombia from July 20, 2000 to July 20, 2001.

In 2003 Uribe-Escobar participated in the foundation of the Democratic Colombia Party which was the base of the former _Sector Democrático_ movement. Uribe-Escobar was considered one of the most important allies of President of Colombia and cousin; Álvaro Uribe.[5]

Parapolitics scandal

Alleged meeting with paramilitaries

In relation to the Colombian parapolitics scandal, Uribe-Escobar was first mentioned by Jairo Castillo Peralta aka “Pitirri” who was a former member of the paramilitary group United Self-Defense Forces of Colombia (AUC) and was a personal bodyguard of former politician Álvaro García Romero also implicated in the scandal for mingling with paramilitaries. From his exile in Canada, Castillo-Peralta said that Uribe-Escobar had met with AUC top commanders in northern Colombia to negotiate cheaper land in the region of Caucasia and in the Department of Sucre.[6] Uribe-Escobar responded to this saying that he did not have any land in Caucasia or Sahagún but he did have land of his property between the towns of Sahagún and Ciénaga de Oro in the Department of Córdoba which were acquired in 1991.[7]

Testimony of Salvatore Mancuso

Imprisoned AUC paramilitary leader Salvatore Mancuso confessed during a court session that he had met with Uribe-Escobar in two occasions with the purpose of forming a political coalition with then Senator of Colombia, Eleonora Pineda for the 2002 Colombian legislative election. Mancuso said that he had asked Pineda to introduce him. Pineda was later accepted into the Democratic Colombia Party, but before the 2006 Colombian presidential election Pineda was expelled.[8]

Arrest warrant

A Delegated Attorney to the Supreme Court of Colombia found enough merits and evidence to issue an arrest warrant against Uribe-Escobar without a right to pay a fine. Uribe-Escobar was syndicated of “concert to commit crimes” consisting on agreeing to promote illegal armed groups. He had been accused by the Supreme Court but since Uribe-Escobar had renounced from his post as senator, ordinary justice could put him on trial.[9] After receiving the notification Uribe-Escobar announced to the Colombian authorities that he was going to surrender voluntarily and comply with the mandate of the Attorney General of Colombia.[10]

End of penalty

Uribe was set free of prison on November 15, 2012. He spent 54 months in jail.[11]

Asylum petition

[1]  El Pais: Mario Uribe no pudo eludir a la Fiscalía

[2]  terra.com: Mario Uribe

[3]

[4]

[5]

[6]  El Universal (Cartagena): Costa Rica negó asilo a Mario Uribe

[7]

[8]

[9]  Caracol Radio: Tras orden de captura, Mario Uribe busca asilo político

[10]

[11]

title: Mario Uribe Escobar

question: What are the reasons behind Uribe-Escobar consorting with paramilitary groups?

answer: It is not stated.

critique: There is no evidence to suggest that the reason for Uribe-Escobar consorting with paramilitary groups is not stated.

critique: It is not stated, but it is implied that Uribe-Escobar consorted with paramilitary groups for personal gain.

critique: The answer is wrong. It is stated that Uribe-Escobar met with paramilitary groups in order to form a political coalition.

critique: the is a reason related, it is stated that he was trying to form a political coalition, so that is a reason behind it.

critique: The answer is not explicitly stated, but it can be assumed that Uribe-Escobar consorted with paramilitary groups for political gain.

critique: It is not stated, but it is implied that he consorted with paramilitary groups for political gain.


text:
PRINCE FEODOR ALEXANDROVICH OF RUSSIA (23 December [O.S. 11 December] 1898 – 30 November 1968) was the second son and third child of Grand Duke Alexander Mikhailovich of Russia and Grand Duchess Xenia Alexandrovna of Russia. He was also a nephew of Nicholas II of Russia, the last Tsar.

Born and raised in Imperial Russia during the reign of his uncle Nicholas II, he followed a military career and entered the Corps of Pages during World War I. With the fall of the Russian monarchy, he escaped the fate of many of his relatives killed by the Bolsheviks fleeing to his parents estate in Crimea. For a time, he was under house arrest there with a large group of family members. They left Russia on 11 April 1919. In exile, he settled in France where he married Princess Irina Pavlovna Paley, his distant cousin. The couple divorced in 1936. Afflicted with tuberculosis, Prince Feodor moved to England with his mother spending the years of World War II there. After the war ended, he settled permanently in the south of France.

Russian prince

Prince Feodor Alexandrovich Romanov was born at the Winter Palace in St. Petersburg, Russian Empire on 23 December 1898. He was the second son and third child among seven siblings. Although a grandson of Emperor Alexander III through his mother, he was not entitled to the title Grand Duke of Russia because he was only a great-grandson of Emperor Nicholas I in the male line through his father. He spent his early years in Imperial Russia. Following family tradition, he began a military career. During World War I he entered the Corps of Pages.

At the fall of the Russian monarchy, he looked for refuge with his family in his father's property in Crimea. They lived there undisturbed until the rise to power of the Bolsheviks with the October Revolution in 1917. For some time, Prince Feodor was under house arrest in Ai-Todor and later at Dulber imprisoned with his parents, siblings, grandmother the Dowager Empress and many more Romanov relatives.

Prince Feodor, and his relatives in the Crimea, escaped the fate of a number of his Romanov cousins who were murdered by the Bolsheviks when they were freed by German troops in 1918. He left Russia on 11 April 1919 abroad the Royal Navy ship HMS Marlborough and moved to England and later to France.

Life in exile

During his first years in exile, Prince Feodor lived in Paris in the apartment of his sister Princess Irina Alexandrovna of Russia and her husband Prince Felix Yusupov. He worked as a taxi driver, and later as an architect.

Prince Feodor married on 21 May 1923 in St. Alexander Nevsky Cathedral in Paris, Princess Irina Paley (1903–1990), his first cousin once removed. She was a daughter of Grand Duke Paul Alexandrovich of Russia and his morganatic wife Princess Olga Paley. The couple had one son:

-   Prince Michael Feodorovich (Paris 4 May 1924 – 22 September 2008); married 1st Paris 15 Oct 1958 (divorced 1992) Helga Staufenberger (born Vienna, 22 August 1926); m. 2nd Josse 15 January 1994 Maria de las Mercedes Ustrell-Cabani (b. Hospitalet, Spain 26 August 1960). Michael died on the same day as his cousin, Prince Michael Andreevich of Russia.[1]

Prince Feodor and his wife lived separated in 1930. Princess Irina began a relationship with Count Hubert de Monbrison (15 August 1892 – 14 April 1981) and had a daughter with him while still married to Prince Feodor, who recognized the child as his.[2]

-   Princess Irene Feodorovna (born 7 May 1934 in Fontenay, France); married 1st Biarritz 23 December 1955 (divorced 1959) Andre Jean Pelle (born Biarritz 29 November 1923); married 2d Le Pin 26 December 1962 (divorced) Victor-Marcel Soulas (born Saint-Méen-le-Grand 26 August 1938).

Prince Feodor Alexandrovich and Princess Irina divorced on 22 July 1936.[3] He did not remarry and spent World War II in England at the home of his mother. By 1941 he was seriously ill with tuberculosis and had to stay for long periods in sanatoriums to recuperate.[4] During the war years, he had sporadic contact with his son who remained in the south of France with Feodor's ex-wife. After the war ended, to improve his health and to stay closer to his son, Prince Feodor settled in the south of France at the villa of his sister Princess Irina Alexandrovna.[5] He lived there for the rest of his life. With very limited income of his own and too ill to work, his ex-wife and his sister helped with the medical bills.[6] Prince Feodor Alexandrovich died on 30 November 1968 in Ascain, France.[7]

Title and style

-   _His Highness_ Prince Feodor Alexandrovich of Russia

Notes

[1] Willis, ''The Romanovs in the 21st Century, p. 175

[2] Willis, ''The Romanovs in the 21st Century, p. 96

[3]

[4] Van Der Kiste & Hall, _Once a Grand Duchess_, p. 216

[5] Van Der Kiste & Hall, _Once a Grand Duchess_, p. 224

[6] Willis, ''The Romanovs in the 21st Century, p. 97

[7]

title: Prince Feodor Alexandrovich of Russia

question: What does the text say about Alexandrovich during and after WWII?

answer: Prince Feodor fell seriously ill with tuberculosis in the early 1940s but recovered for a few years in a sanatorium. He then began to settle in the south of France in 1941, where he died in 1968. As an exile from Russia, he had sporadic contact with his son, who remained in the south of France with Feodor's ex-wife.

critique: It is omitted that he moved to England with his mother during the war.

critique: The response inaccurately mentions that he died in 1941, however he died in 1968.

critique: The text does not mention that he recovered for a few years in a sanatorium.

critique: It is unnecessary for this text to mention the death of Alexandrovich when it talks about before and during WWII.

critique: The question asks about the time period between WWI and his death, not about his life before WWII.

critique: The answer omits that he was in England during the war.

critique: The text does not say that he recovered for a few years in a sanatorium.

question: What does the text say about Alexandrovich before the October Revolution?

answer: Alexandrovich was born and raised in Imperial Russia during the reign of his uncle Nicholas II. He followed a military career and entered the Corps of Pages during World War I. At the fall of the Russian monarchy, he escaped the fate of many of his relatives and fled to his parents' estate in Crimea, where he was under house arrest. From there, he escaped to England during World War I and later settled in France.

critique: "escaped to England during World War I" could be replaced with "escaped to England"

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: "From there, he escaped to England during World War I and later settled in France." - this is inaccurate because he settled permanently in the south of France and did not escape anywhere else.

critique: "From there, he escaped to England during World War I and later settled in France." - this is inaccurate. Alexandrovich escaped to England before the Bolsheviks freed him and his family. He settled in France after the war.

critique: The response should include the year he escaped to England.

critique: The response should include that Alexandrovich was born in 1898.

question: What does the text say about Alexandrovich's marriage?

answer: Prince Feodor Alexandrovich married Princess Irina Paley, his first cousin once removed. They had one son, Prince Michael Feodorovich. The couple got divorced in 1936. Prince Feodor never remarried and lived with his son in the south of France.

critique: The response misses to mention that Princess Irina began a relationship with Count Hubert de Monbrison and had a daughter with him while still married to Prince Feodor.

critique: The answer omits that Irina had a daughter with another man while still married to Feodor.

critique: The answer should mention that Irina had a daughter with another man.

critique: The text does not say that Prince Feodor Alexandrovich lived with his son in the south of France.

critique: The response should include that Irina had an affair and had a daughter with Count Hubert de Monbrison.

critique: Doesn't mention his wife's extramarital daughter.

critique: It's omitted that Irina had a daughter with another man while still married to Alexandrovich.


text:
_A HEAVENLY VINTAGE_, also called _THE VINTNER'S LUCK_,[1] is a 2009 internationally co-produced romantic drama film co-written and directed by Niki Caro. It is loosely based on the novel _The Vintner's Luck_ by Elizabeth Knox. The film had its international premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival on 12 September 2009.

The film stars Jérémie Renier, Vera Farmiga, Gaspard Ulliel, and Keisha Castle-Hughes. The film marked the second time Caro worked with Castle-Hughes, a New Zealand actress and Academy Award nominee.[2]

Plot

The film is the story of Sobran Jodeau (Jérémie Renier), an ambitious young peasant winemaker, and the three loves of his life – his beautiful wife Celeste (Keisha Castle-Hughes), the proudly intellectual baroness Aurora de Valday (Vera Farmiga), and Xas (Gaspard Ulliel), an angel who strikes up an unlikely but enduring friendship that borders on eroticism with him.

Under Xas' guidance, Sobran is forced to fathom the nature of love and belief and in the process grapples with the sensual, the sacred and the profane – in pursuit of the perfect vintage.[3]

Cast

-   Jérémie Renier as Sobran Jodeau
-   Vera Farmiga as Aurora de Valday
-   Gaspard Ulliel as Xas, The Vintner's Luck
-   Keisha Castle-Hughes as Celeste
-   Vania Vilers as Jodeau Senior
-   Eric Godon as Father Lesy
-   Patrice Valota as Comte de Vully
-   Jean-Louis Sbille as Henri
-   Lizzie Brocheré as Sabine

Production

The film was directed by Niki Caro and co-written by Caro and Joan Scheckel. The film is based on the novel _The Vintner's Luck_ by Elizabeth Knox. Knox was disappointed at the direction the film took as she felt Caro “took out what the book was actually about”, referring to the romantic homosexual relationship between Sobran and Xas, which was a core aspect of the novel and was very noticeably toned down in the film version, though it still hints at it. Knox said that she “laid in bed and cried for days” after being shocked and upset by how much it departed from her story.[4]

The film was shot in Auckland, New Zealand, Belgium, and France – including in the medieval castle of Berzé.[5]

Release

The film premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival on 12 September 2009. It was later released in New Zealand on 12 November 2009, Australia on 14 January 2010, and Japan on 23 October 2010. In the United States, the film opened at the Sedona Film Festival on 23 February 2011. It was released to French cinemas on 25 January 2012. The film was released on DVD in the UK on 20 September 2010, in Germany on 16 March 2012, and in the United States on 17 April 2012.[6]

Reception

Critical response

The film has received polarized responses since the Toronto Film Festival. Positive reviews included Paul Fischer of _Dark Horizons_ who said: “A film about humanity and spirituality, Caro directs this film with an exquisite sense of detail. Gorgeous in all facets of visual detail, _The Vintner's Luck_ is also a fascinating romantic melodrama, and at its core, comprises a cast that is spot on”;[7] and Kate Rodger of 3 News who said, “For me, _The Vintner's Luck_ was a gorgeous collection of imagery, sound and movement, with moments of intoxicating beauty.”[8] Other reviewers criticised the film. Peter Brunette of _The Hollywood Reporter_ wrote, “It's difficult to believe that the same director who made the simple and affecting _Whale Rider_ in 2002 is responsible for _The Vintner's Luck_, an overblown work of amazing silliness.”[9] Justin Chang for _Variety_ wrote, “Caro never finds the emotional pulse of the story” in an adaptation he described as “drearily literal-minded”. However, he praised the “lyrical widescreen cinematography.”[10]

Accolades

  Year                                 Award                                       Recipient(s)   Category                              Result
  ------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------- -------------- ------------------------------------- --------
  2010                                 New Zealand Film & TV Awards                Vera Farmiga   Best Lead Actress in a Feature Film
  Grant Major                          Best Production Design in a Feature Film
  Beatrix Pasztor                      Best Costume Design in a Feature Film
  Denis Lenoir                         Best Cinematography
  Keisha Castle-Hughes                 Best Supporting Actress in a Feature Film
  2011                                 Houston International Film Festival         Niki Caro      Gold Remi Best Directing
  _A Heavenly Vintage_                 Special Jury Award – Best Foreign Film
  Sedona International Film Festival   Best Period Film

[1]

[2]

[3]

[4]

[5]

[6]

[7]

[8]

[9]

[10]

title: A Heavenly Vintage

question: What does the text say about the organization of the Toronto International Film Festival?

answer: No answer

critique: The answer should mention that the film festival is international.

critique: The response misses to say that the festival is international.

critique: The answer should mention that the festival is international.

critique: The response misses to provide an answer to the task.

critique: Answers are dragged into the response without providing any.

critique: The answer should mention the festival's international nature.

question: Summarize the critical response to the film.

answer: The film has received polarized responses since the Toronto Film Festival. Positive reviews included Paul Fischer of Dark Horizons who said the film is a fascinating romantic melodrama, and Kate Rodger of 3 News who said the film is a gorgeous collection of imagery, sound, and movement. Other reviewers criticized the film. Peter Brunette of The Hollywood Reporter wrote that it's difficult to believe that the same director who made the simple and affecting Whale Rider in 2002 is responsible for The Vintner's Luck, an overblown work of amazing silliness. Justin Chang for Variety wrote that Caro never finds the emotional pulse of the story in an adaptation he described as drearily literal-minded. However, he praised the lyrical widescreen cinematography.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

question: What does the text say about Niki Caro?

answer: Niki Caro is the director of the film A Heavenly Vintage. She co-wrote the film with Joan Scheckel. Caro is also the director of Whale Rider, a film that received positive reviews. Caro's work on A Heavenly Vintage has received polarized reviews.

critique: The response inaccurately mentions that Caro is also the director of Whale Rider, however the text only mentions that Caro directed the film.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

question: Summarize the author's reaction to the screen adaptation of The Vintner's Luck.

answer: Elizabeth Knox was disappointed at the direction the film took as she felt the director, Niki Caro, took out the romantic homosexual relationship between her characters that was a core in her book. She felt Caro took out what the book was actually about. Knox never saw the script for the film. The film completed and was released in New Zealand on November 12, 2009. The author felt that this version was "a gorgeous collection of imagery, sound, and movement" and felt that the director did an exquisite job at capturing the imagery of the book in an intoxicating romantic.

critique: The film was released in New Zealand on November 12, 2009, not completed.


text:
In this new age, technology was expanding at a rate that we could hardly comprehend. At the turn of a new decade, we ventured into space once more. By half a century, we had expanded beyond our Mother Earths loving arms, into the cold and foreboding expanse of our solar system. Luna Novis was prospering. Aries One was establishing a foothold on the blood-red sands of Mars. Eyes settled on asteroids, and on Jupiter. Wealths of knowledge and resources lay in wait. Our greed, and our ignorance was immeasurable. Humanity established new industries, and individuals rose into great power.

In all of our prosperity, and all of our progress, we could not free ourselves from the shackles of belief. There were those that opposed the progress. They warned against returning to the void beyond our world. They spoke out against our settlement of foreign worlds. We did not listen. We shunned these malcontent individuals. We blissfully exploited our home solar system for decades. We had no idea...

We had no idea how wrong we were, to ignore the warnings of our brothers. No idea at all.

At the turn of the century, progress began to stabilize. We established the first actual cities on Mars, and had spread across most of our Moon, as well as Ganymede and Titan. Our society was as united as it had ever been. War was a thing of the past. The last conflict had been settled early in the previous century. We grew complacent. We truly believed we had ascended beyond conflict entirely. We fancied ourselves a generation of scholars. We could not comprehend the magnitude of our folly. Nobody could predict that the reality that we had created for ourselves was so fragile.

In the second decade of this new century, we received a signal unlike any we had ever received, save for one, late in a previous century, for a mere moment. It was directed, sustained, and clear. We were being observed. We had always been observed. These forces beyond comprehension settled eyes on us. We expected tides of praise, of commendation for our progress towards peace, and prosperity. These hopes were shattered. These observers condemned us. They damned us for all of our faults. Our strife, our hatred of old. Our abuse of the mother that so thanklessly gave us life, and held us up. They spat upon our feeble veil of progress. We pleaded for answers, but all words fell upon unhearing ears.

One final transmission came to us. It came in the form of a single sentence. And that one, solitary sentence was delivered to all men, and all women, and all children. No eyes failed to see this message. They delivered this unto us, and brought down all that we worked so hard for.

"Your time has come to an end."

Our panic was like no panic before. We knew not how long we had. We knew not how we would prepare. We awoke a beast within ourselves that had long been slumbering, deep in our psyche. That brotherhood of prophets that had warned us, pleaded to us to forgo the stars, rose up once more. They heralded the end of us. They spoke down upon us and damned us, and gave us no forgiveness. We smote them from the soil, and the sky, and the void. We removed them utterly. We erupted into a broiling projection of desperation. We constructed machines of strife. Factories that lay dormant for generations were stirred. We forged the instruments of death once again.

For ten decades, we prepared. We were directed, and determined. We were furious, that some entity shall so easily dismiss everything we worked towards. We made ready, for generations. All of our progress was directed into a speartip, ready to be thrust into the heart of this beast that was now at our doorstep. We massed these vessels of our anger. All souls capable were enlisted, and all those prepared did lead. These armies of Man marched towards the gates of Oblivion, to meet their judgment.

And lo did these Men march, in their ships, and with their weapons in hand. They would meet this force that made itself their enemy, and would dash them from the very universe. And so meet them they did, these Judges, in the space between Giants, in the far reaches of our solar system. They met them with teeth bared, and weapons made ready. They borne unto them stars of solar fury, and lances of broiling hatred, and rattling flames of absolute wrath. They spilled upon this enemy their discontent. For days, they did do battle with these Judges, and for days, it would appear that they were to be victorious.

On the first and second day, they met them in space. They barraged those dark vessels, and those reaching tendrils of doom with nuclear detestation, and ionized beams of abhorrence. They smote them from the void with such ease. Surely these cannot be those who damned them a century ago. With great eagerness, they drove their campaign on, and such this enemy crashed at their gates without relent.

On the third and fourth day, they met them aboard their ships, and on the surface of moons, as this enemy began to gain foothold on our beloved solar system. They did battle furiously, bringing devastation upon this crepuscular foe in great volumes, fearing nothing as they did battle. Surely they can deliver their fellows from this great nightmare that seethed at them. With no amount of trepidation, they committed these acts of strife.

On the fifth and sixth day, they wove among the tumbling boulders between Mars and Jupiter. Surely this force of Mankinds greatest power shall not be defeated by this foreign foe, this tenebrous animal which thrusts itself against the spear of the warriors. Ships were dashed upon the rocks, and lives vanished among debris without a trace. This great nebulous foe was upon us. Our greatest warriors failed us utterly. Hulls of ships spun in the void of space, smoldering wrecks a testament to our arrogance. Blood of men was spread across a dozen worlds, and across millions of miles of void. Billions of eyes gazed into the sky, and saw the billowing shade that was their reckoning.

On the seventh day, our greatest downfall was upon us. Inky tendrils grasped out towards our worlds, first to Mars. As the dark tentacle reached this crimson planet, the sky flared red, burning away as the surface was cleansed of the lives that had called it home for nearly two centuries. Two billion lives cried out in fear, as their world was scoured by this great evil. This beast consumed the world utterly, sheathing it in a seething blackness for a day. When it passed on, the red planet was dead once more, its surface scorched and black as the force that had consumed it.

As the billowing shade approached humanities last bastion, our leaders cried and pleaded and begged to it for forgiveness. There was no reply. They threatened with nuclear fury, and once again, there was no reply. Finally they begged for an answer. What were they. Their Judge replied to them at last, solemnly "We are your hatred. We are the sins of your fathers."

In our final moments, we gaze upon our finality. We see with our own eyes the true price of our arrogance, and our ignorance, and our strife. All of our crimes against our fellow man led to this moment of great annihilation. As our sky burned away, and one by one our lives were torn from this plane, and as our mortal forms were extinguished, we truly know the cost of Sin. In our transience, we truly know retribution.

The Sins of our Fathers, are visited upon their Sons.

title: [SF] Sins of Our Fathers

question: Summarize everything relating to the progress of society.

answer: At the turn of the new decade, humanity ventured into space once more. By half a century, they had expanded into the solar system. Luna Novis was prospering. Aries One was establishing a foothold on Mars. Wealths of knowledge and resources lay in wait. Humanity established new industries, and individuals rose into great power. At the turn of the century, progress began to stabilize. They established the first actual cities on Mars, and had spread across most of the Moon, as well as Ganymede and Titan. Their society was as united as it had ever been. War was a thing of the past. The last conflict had been settled early in the previous century. They grew complacent. They truly believed they had ascended beyond conflict entirely.

critique: The answer should mention the observers.

critique: They established the first actual cities on Mars, and had spread across most of the Moon, as well as Ganymede and Titan.

critique: The answer is a summary of the entire story, not just the progress of society.

critique: The answer should mention that the society was united, but the observers condemned them.

question: What does the story say about humanity's contact with aliens before the attack?

answer: No answer

critique: The response misses to mention that humanity received a signal that they were being observed.

critique: The answer should mention the first contact with aliens.

critique: The response misses to provide an answer to the task.

question: What does the story say about space exploration?

answer: Humanity ventured into space again, expanded our solar system and established new industries. Luna Novis was prospering and Aries One was establishing a foothold on the blood-red sands of Mars. We also had eyes on asteroids and Jupiter. However, what sets the story in the future is that we had established the first actual cities on Mars. At the turn of the century, progress began to stabilize. We established the first actual cities on Mars, and had spread across most of our Moon, as well as Ganymede and Titan.

critique: The second sentence is irrelevant to the question.

critique: The response should include that humanity was expanding through the solar system and was being watched by unknown observers.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: The answer is irrelevant and should be removed.

critique: The answer should mention the observers.

question: What does the story say about the alien civilization's culture?

answer: No answer

critique: The response doesn't really reflect the passage.

critique: The response misses to provide an answer to the task.


text:
THOMAS ALLSTON BROWN (January 16, 1836 – April 2, 1918) was an American theater critic, newspaper editor, talent agent and manager, and theater historian, best known for his books, _History of the American Stage_ (Dick & Fitzgerald: New York, 1870) and _A History of the New York Stage from the First Performance in 1732 to 1901_ (Dodd Mead: New York, 1902).

Life and career

Brown was born in Newburyport, Massachusetts, to Thomas James Brown (1800–1867) and Lucretia Hamsly Brown _(née_ Lucretia Hamsly Milton; 1810–1872).[1] He began his career as the Philadelphia correspondent and theater critic for the top entertainment journal of the time, the _New York Clipper_. He freelanced for other show-business publications and published his own paper, called _The Tattler_.[2][3]

In 1860, Brown entered show business as the advance man for the Cooper English Opera Company, managed by virtuoso violinist Henry Charles Cooper (1819–1881). He later worked for Gardner & Madigan's Circus (re: the Gardner and Madigan families, including Dan Gardner and John Madigan) as treasurer and manager of the box office.[4] During one circus performance, the assistant to the ropewalker Blondine went missing. Blondine's opening stunt was to walk a tightrope from the stage to the balcony with a person on his back. T. Allston Brown filled in for the missing helper, and the _Baltimore Press_ dubbed him “Colonel” for the deed. Brown adopted the honorary title and used it for the remainder of his career.[5]

In 1863, Brown was named editor of the _New York Clipper_. He kept the post until 1872, when he retired from journalism. He next pursued a career as an agent and manager for entertainers. His clients included the famous female impersonator Ernest Byne (1848–1904), the Hanlon Brothers, and Mlle. Marie Aimée (sv) (1852–1857). On May 7, 1879, Brown became partner with Morris Simmonds (1839–1896) in Simmonds & Brown, Dramatic Agents, and continued to run the company after Simmonds died.[6]

As early as 1858, Brown had begun compiling stories and biographies of theatrical performers in the United States.[7] Much of his material came from players in the field, who supplied biographical sketches.[8] He began to write a book on the subject, and in 1870 he published the exhaustive _History of the American Stage_.[9][10] In 1906, he retired from show business to devote more time to history and writing.[11] Brown died in Philadelphia in 1918. _The New York Times_ wrote in Brown's obituary that _A History of the New York Stage_, published in 1903, “was said to be one of the most complete accounts of the development of the stage in America that has been written”.[12][13]

Notes

[1] Thomas Allston Brown, Massachusetts, Town Records, 1620-1988, Ancestry.com

[2] Cullen 147.

[3] Sentilles 122.

[4]

[5] Cullen 148.

[6]

[7]

[8]

[9]

[10]

[11]

[12]

[13] “Col. T. Allston Brown”, _The New York Times_, 1918-04-04, p. 13.

title: T. Allston Brown

question: Describe Hamsley Brown's career trajectory from critic to historian and author.

answer: Brown began his career as a Philadelphia correspondent and theater critic for the New York Clipper. He later freelanced for other show-business publications. He published his own paper, called The Tattler. In 1860, Brown entered show business as the advance man for the Cooper English Opera Company. He then worked for Gardner & Madigan's Circus as treasurer and manager of the box office. In 1863, Brown was named editor of the New York Clipper. He kept the post until 1872, when he retired from journalism. He then pursued a career as an agent and manager for entertainers. In 1906, he retired from show business to devote more time to history and writing.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: "He then worked for Gardner & Madigan's Circus as treasurer and manager of the box office." - this is inaccurate. Brown was never the treasurer or manager of the box office. He was the advance man.

critique: The answer omits that he published his first book, History of the American Stage, in 1870.

critique: The response misses to mention that Brown began compiling stories and biographies of theatrical performers in the United States as early as 1858.

critique: It is omitted that he published a book on the subject, and in 1870 he published the exhaustive History of the American Stage.


text:
*I KNOW YOU'RE EXCITED, BUT YOU REALLY NEED TO WATCH THE GRAMMAR, SIR. REGARDLESS, I THINK THIS IS THE ONE. GREAT SPEECH, SIR, AND GOD BLESS YOU"

From the Desk of the President of the United States of America:

People of this sovereign nation, I must first apologize to the children pulled out of their daily studies, and to the adults pulled out of their work for this day of celebration. I'm sure you were very busy, but now you must prepare yourselves for grand and wonderful news. Today, will be a day marked in history. In the future, those that come after will look upon today as a day of gratitude. The honor of the first thanks that we must give, belongs to none other than our military. We have employed the bravest men and women to uphold the peace of this nation and those that were too weak to defend themselves, and with the blessings of all of our branches of government, the clergy, and the other world leaders, we can declare their mission accomplished. Perhaps for our ancestors, war was a necessity, who's to say? We, however, are a new people in a new age, and the discoveries that we are making have given us ample tools to end the need for war altogether. We have too much to look forward to that we must prepare for, and can not distract ourselves with such useless practices. No more will we create armed drones, or nuclear weapons. Consider our drones in retirement, used only for mapping undiscovered regions of our planet, and making deliveries. Consider our nuclear weapons as warnings that we will leave to our children, and decommissioned. Those who have died in the travesty of war have not died in vain, for they have shown us the horrors that man is capable of that we must rise above within ourselves, as it is the destiny of man to elevate himself beyond the confines of what even nature imposes on him. There will still be those that feel hatred, and greed, but we, the leaders of the world, agree that at this time the earth is also blessed to have enough people that can elevate themselves, and live life the positive way. Those that are left behind from the rest of us due to their ways are welcomed to join this global fraternity at any time. We are a patient people, and have much busy work to do. Please don't take too long, however, we'd very much like your participation in these wonderful plans. It is at this moment, we offer thanks to the countless victims of hatred in a time when it was uncontrolled, and request a moment of silence.

 Now, we will use more than 3/4 of the annual military budget in the peaceful exploration of our oceans and outer space. On this historic day, with the blessed alliance with other sovereign leaders, the United States of America has formed the Brotherhood for the Exploration, and the Advancement of Mankind. Kinda long winded, isn't it? BEAM is comprised of only the best leaders in these stunning fields, the best scientists, the bravest men, the most daring engineers who refuse any limits imposed on them based on what others believe is "possible." When I was a boy, I wanted to be an astronaut, but didn't have the maths. Now, no child will have to be turned away from this dream due to a letter on a report card. BEAM will open schools for the most dedicated pupils, and any may be accepted, provided they pass the public tests that the instructors agree upon. Keep in mind, however, that admission to these schools is free.

The ocean harbors many secrets from us, and the time has come to learn from the wonders it has to offer us. For all that we know, every answer that we could seek is enwrapped within it's cozy waters. Fairly recently, our wonderful scientists have discovered enough freshwater aquifers beneath the ocean to hold off, if not prevent, a global water crisis. Who's to say that the cure for cancer isn't down there as well? Or a previously unheard of clean energy that will help aid us in this new era of peace? Who's to say that the answer to man's oldest enemy: time, will not be discovered in it's inky depths? We have given billions to fund new schools for underwater exploration, which will select only the best and bravest explorers to undertake this grand journey. Have at it, boys. You have our full trust, and monetary backing any time you require it.

Now that marijuana is legal, unprecedented numbers of you have looked to the stars and wondered. Well, we have listened.  We have all felt the stars beckoning, and we will answer their call. Our droogs from the motherland have been the ushers into the wonderful age of space exploration, and have offered us many insights into this sublime development. One of such was provided by one of the greatest men to have ever lived, Konstantin Tsiolkovsky, who had this to say: "The Earth is the cradle of humanity, but mankind cannot stay in the cradle forever." We have listened, Konstantin, rest well friend. It has been fulfilled, man has finally outgrown our cradle, and upon completion of the proper blueprints, we will begin construction on the first interstellar vessel in man's long history. We will use the latest advances in technology, including 3d printing to begin constructing this ship, and with the advances of modern medicine available to all the citizens of the world, many of us will live to see it's completion, and perhaps even become the pioneers which will lead our kind to new worlds. We will take the fittest and brightest men and start training to begin the making of this vessel. We will need many, and if you are dedicated enough, then we ask for little else. In this new age, you will not be compensated much in money (which will soon become obsolete), but fear not. You shall be remembered as heroes for all of time. We will build new societies, inhabited by the most tranquil and loving that our world has to offer. Let us now extend our gratitude to God, for making perseverance and thirst for adventure such core concepts of the human spirit.

To those that doubt our new conquest, allow me to point to the Outer Space Treaty, which, since it's inception in 1967, has banned the use of weapons in space. We have been able to uphold it thus far, and the time for the ban of weapons on earth has finally been initiated. The time has come to rise together as one people. Everything that our fathers, and our father's fathers have lived through has led to this. Countless individual experiences has led to the day when mankind comes together, and claims his ultimate destiny. Today, let us give thanks that greed selfishness has been abolished for the greater good of all our brothers, that there will be no more policing of world matters, as the world is now an open platform that any man, woman or child, can change with the proper ideas, that there will be no more secrets held from the people of the world by their governments now, or ever, only surprises that will make them feel ten times the gratitude that we of the world feel today. Go forth, and celebrate the beginning of the day that will lead to adventures that are impossible to imagine. Let me extend my personal gratitude to all of you, my brothers, this is the start of when we live as such for always and eternity. Tomorrow we begin, but today...we shall celebrate! Prepare well, friends. Our destiny is at hand. God Bless.

title: "From the Desk of the President..."

question: Summarize why this day will be marked in history.

answer: In the future, markers in history will note this date as a day of gratitude. The President of the United States of America states that it is a day of exoneration. The President states that they will ending armed drones, and characterizes the nuclear program of the United States as warnings to future generations. The President announces that they will allot more than ¾ of the annual military budget to exploring outer space and the oceans. They have also called these funds the Brotherhood for the Exploration and Advancement of Mankind.

critique: The President is not the one who states that the day will be marked in history.

critique: The President does not state that the day will be marked in history as a day of exoneration.

critique: There is no mention of the President's stating that it is a day of exoneration.

critique: This sentence is confusing, and has very little to do with the reason this day could be marked in history.

critique: The President does not state that it is a day of exoneration.

question: What does the story say about weaponry?

answer: The President announces that all weaponry must now be retired and is no longer useful, and the money allocated for war will now be used for peaceful space exploration and exploration of the ocean. Man should now look to the stars and be guided by the dreams and wonder of the abyss and space. Humanity, they say, is ready to conquer those places, and earn its destiny.

critique: The response includes extraneous information not useful for the task.

critique: It is not clear that the money allocated for war will now be used for peaceful space exploration and exploration of the ocean.

critique: The answer should mention the Outer Space Treaty.

question: What does the story say about the ocean?

answer: The ocean harbors many secrets from us, so it's time to explore those secrets. Fairly recently, scientists discovered freshwater aquifers under the ocean that can save the world from a global water crisis. They also discovered that it's possible to cure cancer and find clean energy beneath the ocean. Countless individual human experience has led to the day when mankind discovered billions to fund new schools for exploration beneath the ocean that's available to all. Now, it's time to answer the stars and explore outer space.

critique: The sentence about answering the stars and exploring outer space is irrelevant.

critique: The answer is irrelevant to the question.

critique: The answer should mention the Outer Space Treaty.

critique: "Now, it's time to answer the stars and explore outer space." - this part is irrelevant and should be removed.

question: What does the text say about population control?

answer: No answer

critique: The text does not mention population control.

critique: The response misses to provide an answer to the task.

critique: The text doesn't mention population control.


text:
I hated that ancient pair of shoes.  Supporting a wife and child meant I had to make them last.  The backs had fallen apart and the metal cut into my heels with every goddamn step I took.  They had been digging the same holes into my feet all week but, as I walked to my car after a long day of work, it was especially intolerable.  Maybe that was why I was so short with that girl when she approached me.

My eyes were on the ground as I walked through the outdoor parking lot.  I couldn't wait to be home.  I took solace in the fact that my wife and daughter would be asleep.  I could sneak in and clean the cut on my forehead and stop the bleeding from my knuckles before they saw me.

Behind me, I heard someone call out, "Hey, Mister."

Knowing my city, the odds were high that anybody approaching me in a parking lot at night was about to stab me and take my wallet.  I snapped to attention, swiveling my head around and balling my hands into fists.  I flinched in pain as I remembered my hurt knuckles.

To my relief, there was only a hooker behind me.  She held her hands together and shook as if she was cold.  But I knew why she was actually shaking.

"No thanks," I said as I turned and started to walk back to my car.

"Actually, I, uh, I was wondering if you were, you know, carrying," she said, teetering up behind me on her high heels.

"No."

"Oh.  Well, you know, I'm really in need of a fix, Mister."

"Sorry to hear that," I lied.

"Well... can I at least suck your dick, Mister?  I need some money."

"Don't say that," I said without turning around.

"Who are you, my dad?"

"No, just don't say what service you're offering.  If I were a cop I'd be able to arrest you.  Just tell guys that you want to party."

"Oh.  Sorry, Sir."

Her accent was gone but manners like those didn't come from the city.  She still had her Southern charm.

"Well, actually, mister, maybe you could give me a ride."

"No."

"Oh, please.  It's only a few blocks.  I really need a fix.  Really bad."

"I have to get home," I said as I spotted my car.  Justa  few more steps in those goddamn awful shoes.

"It's a dangerous walk, Mister.  Please, Mister.  Please."

"It's even more dangerous to get in a car with a stranger, you dumb bitch!" I snapped as I turned to face her.  "You don't know a goddamn thing about me but you're still trying to climb into a car with me!"

"You have a kind face, Mister," she said meekly.

I turned to walk to my car, laughing.  "Really?  You think so?  Well you're a shitty judge of character."

I was infuriated when I could still hear her steps behind me.  As I reached my car, I faced her again.  She was sobbing.  Underneath the running makeup I saw her face for the first time.  Her lifestyle made her age twice as fast, but I could see her youthful eyes glistening with tears.  She couldn't have been out of her early-twenties.  Her eyes reminded me of my daughter's.  That unsettled me.

"Can you please take me home, Sir?" she sobbed.  "The bus station isn't far from here.  I just wanna go home to my daddy.  I never wanna see this city again."

"You have a father and a home?" I asked in disbelief.  "Then why the hell did you leave them for this shithole of a city?"

"Please, Mister.  Don't make me walk over there at this time of night.  The bus station is just a few blocks away."

The bus station was on the other side of town and I had no interest in staying out any later than I had to.

"Can't you see that I have blood pouring out of my head and my knuckles!  I'm a violent person!  I make a living through violence, for God's sake!  And you're trying to jump into a car with me because you think I have a kind face?  I hope my daughter grows up to be a better judge of character than you."

I froze when I realized the implications of what I had just said.  I was a violent man.  The kind that I wouldn't want my daughter anywhere near.

I was hypnotized by my realization when I felt the girl put her hand on my shoulder.  I did not know how to respond to affection.  So I responded with violence.

I backhanded her across the face.  I swore as I remembered my injured knuckle and held my hand to fight the pain.  The hooker backpedaled, holding her face.  She looked back to me one last time and yelled, "That's why!  That's why I left my father for this shithole of a city!"  Then she stormed off into the darkness.

At last, I sat in my car.  I didn't start the engine, though.  I looked at myself in the rear-view mirror.  I studied myself, trying to see why anybody would think I had a kind face.  To this day, I still can't see what that hooker saw in my face.

Maybe it was because I saw what became of that girl from the South.  Maybe it was because of the violence in my job.  Maybe it was because I wanted to get a new pair of fucking shoes.  Whatever the reason, I didn't go home that night.  I never saw my daughter again.

title: Why I Abandoned My Daughter

question: What does the story say about the narrator's relationship with his daughter?

answer: The narrator is a violent man and he fears he would be a bad influence on his daughter. He fears he would be a bad influence on her because he is a violent man. He is a violent man who makes a living through violence. The narrator is also a man who doesn't go home to his wife and daughter after work. He doesn't want to go home and see his daughter because he fears he would be a bad influence on her.

critique: The narrator's relationship with his daughter is not discussed in the story.

critique: The narrator's relationship with his daughter is not explicitly stated.

critique: The narrator's actions are not necessarily a reflection of his feelings about his daughter.

critique: The narrator fears he would be a bad influence on his daughter because he is a violent man. He is a violent man who makes a living through violence. The narrator is also a man who doesn't go home to his wife and daughter after work. He doesn't want to go home and see his daughter because he fears he would be a bad influence on her.

critique: The narrator doesn't go home because of the actions in the story. He is a violent man and he fears he would be a bad influence on his daughter. He fears he would be a bad influence on her because he is a violent man. He is a violent man who makes a living through violence.

critique: The last six sentences are unnecessary and extraneous, redundant, and confusing

text: It is omitted that he abandoned his daughter.

question: Summarize the requests the hooker makes of the man.

answer: The hooker first requests that the man give her a ride. The man does so. After a short distance, the hooker tells him she is in urgent need of a fix and requests that the man give her money. She requests that the man pay for a specific service.

critique: The man does not give the hooker a ride.

critique: The response inaccurately mentions that the hooker requests that the man give her money.

critique: "After a short distance, the hooker tells him she is in urgent need of a fix and requests that the man give her money. She requests that the man pay for a specific service." - this is not the man's response and is inaccurate. The request for a ride was denied. The girl never asked for money for a drug fix. The man never paid for any service and made it clear that he was not a cop. Delete this section.

question: What does the story say about the city the characters are in?

answer: The city is known for being dangerous, with a reputation for people being stabbed and robbed.

critique: "People being stabbed and robbed" is not stated.

critique: The story does not mention that the city is known for people being stabbed and robbed.

critique: It is omitted that the city is described as a shithole.

critique: It is omitted that the city has the reputation of being a shithole with drug problems.

critique: It's omitted that the city also has a reputation for having a large number of drug addicts.

critique: The response could use clearer language.

question: What does the story say about the daughter's reaction to being abandoned by the narrator?

answer: No answer

critique: The response misses to provide an answer to the task.

critique: The article does not explicitly state what the daughter's reaction was, but it can be inferred that she was very upset, as evidenced by her lack of communication with the narrator from then on.